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Original poster

Can manager prevent me from going to HR?

95 replies

hairup · 06/03/2023 17:15

I have started a new job and my line manager is best friends with 2 toxic colleague, who say horrible things about all the other colleagues.

Today my line manager disclosed something to them about an email I had sent her which encouraged them to start slagging me off in front of all my colleagues. One told me what was being said.

One of the comments amounted to how she is going to "fuck with me". I think she is going to try to sabotage my work from what I can gather.

I have been encouraged to complain to HR about the three of them, as they feel that the are bullies and get away with disclosing personal info about colleagues.

My line manager much to everyone's dismay, is being given a role soon that will make her privy to the mental health of all of us. Nobody wants to go to her for any well being ambassador, due to her indiscretions and because she is part of the bully group,

I have tried to call a meeting with her manager, but I get the feeling that I am being fobbed off. I am only allowed a group meeting with my team which includes one of the bullies tomorrow.

I do not want to stand for this as I feel I am being bullied. Can I report it to HR without the managers blessing?

OP posts:
trampoline123 · 06/03/2023 17:17

Of course you can.

Original poster
hairup · 06/03/2023 17:17

Do I say I want to put in a grievance?

OP posts:
MrsWobble3 · 06/03/2023 17:19

Does your company have a whistleblowing email or phone number? I’d report it via that.

drpet49 · 06/03/2023 17:19

I would be lodging grievance with HR asap. Your manager cannot stop you doing this.

GenuinelyDone · 06/03/2023 17:20

I'd suggest following your company's grievance procedure.

If there isn't one email HR to request support in raising one.

Keep it factual and include witness names.

SilverGlitterBaubles · 06/03/2023 17:20

Appalling unprofessional behaviour, I would report to HR immediately.

Sagittarius25 · 06/03/2023 17:20

As some one who works in HR, yes you can.

You can either go grievance route straight away or just go and speak to them. I'm sure they have an open door policy, as most HR people do, and that is partly what they are there for.

If you raise a grievance they will likely hold and investigation and speak to relevant people, although they will keep the source of the grievance as confidential as possible.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 06/03/2023 17:21

Yes, of course you can contact HR directly. They will probably advise you to follow the normal grievance procedure in any case, so familiarise yourself with that and ensure that you have enough evidence to back up your case.

Be aware that some grievance procedures state that you should attempt to address the matter informally first with the people who you are complaining about. If you haven't done this, you might need to be ready with an explanation of why you didn't feel able to address it with them directly

Original poster
hairup · 06/03/2023 17:22

Whistleblowing for the indiscretion? I think they will try and minimise it.

It is very telling that colleagues who have been there a while are actively encouraging me to complain and are horrified that the indiscreet line manager will be privy to vulnerable people's business.

OP posts:
QuertyGirl · 06/03/2023 17:23

Are you in a union?

If not, Acas

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 06/03/2023 17:24

Whistleblowing is not the appropriate channel for dealing with a personal grievance. You need to talk to HR or follow the standard grievance procedure.

trampoline123 · 06/03/2023 17:24

You can definitely report this to HR, I really hope they take it seriously.

Keep everything you can in writing or even just keep a written log bit having written evidence is best.

Brightshinylight · 06/03/2023 17:32

Keep all evidence and log a grievance with HR. Managers are privy to confidential information & it needs to be kept confidential for legal purposes (GDPR etc).

Speak to ACAS and find out what legal rights you have if she does leak this type of information.

Original poster
hairup · 06/03/2023 17:32

Oh they know who the grievance is coming from alright, as my colleague stood up in disgust and told them they were horrible the way they were talking about me. She moved away from them.

Problem is I cried on the phone to a different line manager because quite frankly I was so upset and angry (and think I'm having severe perimenopausal symptoms), that they are targeting me. Also, I sent an email to her manager but feel she fobbed me off.

OP posts:
Original poster
hairup · 06/03/2023 17:34

Well her toxic friends admitted the investigate people together every evening. They asked me if I had social media but never talk to me usually lol.

I think they are trying to investigate me.

OP posts:
Original poster
hairup · 06/03/2023 17:37

I don't really have proof of what the line manager might disclose (apart from her shit stirring for me today), but I really feel that we all need protection from her. Everyone is saying she wants the mental health role to pry and spread our business around. So if other colleagues are saying this I do not think she should be given this role as nobody wants to go to her.

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FictionalCharacter · 06/03/2023 17:47

What's the role the manager has been given? I can't think of any role outside occupational health and HR that gives someone access to people's health records, including mental health. Disclosing people's confidential health info to others would be extremely unethical and potentially a sackable offence.
Your workplace sounds horribly toxic and gossipy. Could this be a rumour?

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 06/03/2023 17:47

hairup · 06/03/2023 17:37

I don't really have proof of what the line manager might disclose (apart from her shit stirring for me today), but I really feel that we all need protection from her. Everyone is saying she wants the mental health role to pry and spread our business around. So if other colleagues are saying this I do not think she should be given this role as nobody wants to go to her.

If you put in a grievance, I think you need to focus on your own specific complaints. Don't mention what others are saying or thinking because that just looks like gossip, and ultimately, it's for them to speak up if they want to.

Be clear about specific examples of things that your line manager has said or done, and explain how they have impacted on you personally.

If you go in with a complaint based on what others don't like about her, it will really weaken your argument. If others feel strongly, then they should put in their own grievance. Alternatively, if you all have the same issues, you could put in a collective grievance but don't attempt to speak for others unless they're willing to put their names on it.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 06/03/2023 17:48

Also, you can't make your grievance about what the manager "might disclose" at some point in the future. You need to focus on what she has already done to make you concerned about this.

DPotter · 06/03/2023 17:49

Honestly hairup this sounds such a toxic environment that I'd be looking to get out of there pronto. What are your options for looking for a new job. Don't worry about being there for such a short time, it's not ideal but needs must - you can explain the workplace wasn't as advertised / was a poor fit for you

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 06/03/2023 17:50

I agree, it sounds horribly toxic.

TragicMuse · 06/03/2023 17:54

I'd also be raising it as a personal data breach that your personal information has been shared with other people who are not entitled to see it.

That's a clear breach and one I would investigate (I'm the breach lead for my employers).

Depending on what was shared and whether there was any malice it might meet the threshold for escalation to the commissioner.

Original poster
hairup · 06/03/2023 17:55

FictionalCharacter · 06/03/2023 17:47

What's the role the manager has been given? I can't think of any role outside occupational health and HR that gives someone access to people's health records, including mental health. Disclosing people's confidential health info to others would be extremely unethical and potentially a sackable offence.
Your workplace sounds horribly toxic and gossipy. Could this be a rumour?

No it's not a rumour. That's colleagues trying to protect themselves from this toxic trio. Saying they investigate people every evening is a bit of a giveaway who the problem is and it's not my other kind and supportive colleagues.

OP posts:
Original poster
hairup · 06/03/2023 17:58

TragicMuse · 06/03/2023 17:54

I'd also be raising it as a personal data breach that your personal information has been shared with other people who are not entitled to see it.

That's a clear breach and one I would investigate (I'm the breach lead for my employers).

Depending on what was shared and whether there was any malice it might meet the threshold for escalation to the commissioner.

Unfortunately what was shared could be easily minimised it was an error I made that didn't affect anyone else but it was used to ridicule me and cause me trouble.

OP posts:
Original poster
hairup · 06/03/2023 17:59

The role is some sort of well-being ambassador where you go and tell your problems.

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