Do all well paid professionals work really hard long hours

[CheshireSplat]

Just feeling a bit battered. Took a step-up to a senior role 4 years ago and am well respected. Have been promoted a couple of times and salary has increased by about 50%. Which is great, but isn't what I planned!!! My responsibilities and workload have also increased significantly.

My DC are 9 and 6 and I'd like to spend more time with them. I'd also like to spend some time doing normal things, like doing more than 1000 steps a day and getting off my chair. I don't have time to tidy the house, which gets me down. I didn't sign up for a Big Job. And it's getting a bit much. I'm managing to resist doing much work at weekends but Monday morning to Friday night it is absolutely full on and I'm working at full pelt, from early til late.

Is this normal? There certainly seems to be an epidemic of busyness, or do people feel they have to say they are busy? I'm 44 and feel my life is passing me by.

I have an interview for a job in the NFP sector, similar role, big pay cut but we can cope, don't have extravagant lifestyle. Am I kidding myself if I think it would be different there?

I'm just rambling. Would love to see what others think..... Thank you. Problem is work is important to me, and I like a challenge.

OP, I earn about the same as you pro rata and finish work at 5.30 every day, as a PSL. It’s many times less than I would be earning if I had stayed a fee earner (especially if I had been promoted to partner) but equally the hours are far less and it’s meant I can continue as a lawyer and still see my kids. This is in London.

I don’t think NFP is going to solve your problems. Does everyone where you are work long hours? Is there anyone you can speak to about finding more balance, whether that’s defined hours or PT? They obviously rate you and won’t want to lose you.

The salaries on this thread...! It's another world.

Anyway, just popping in to say that I'm a trustee of a very small NFP and our CEO is run ragged for considerably less than half of what you earn. Also she has to put up with people like me interfering.

It depends on the profession.

We’re both actuaries, we are both fairly high earners despite working part time, we don’t work particularly hard, we certainly don’t suffer with stress at work.

Have you thought about finding a jobshare partner?

I earn 75k and DH 85k and we don't work crazy hours - we do 4.5 days compressed into 5 - occasional evening/weekend crisis but it's genuinely occasional. We are public sector which helps

My husband is in tech and on a salary of sig. >100k.

He generally works 9-5.30/6 with a 1 hr lunch break, but other than that works solidly throughout the day. He normally does 2-4 hours overtime a week (inc. when he finishes at 6). He does ‘study’ or do personal projects some evenings for a few hours some evenings, but he picks stuff he enjoys and his job is also his hobby.

He has built a good reputation within his company, has really strong boundaries and is quite strategic in preempting/preventing ‘crises’ that will cause overtime. Some of his coworkers much longer hours than him though, it’s not an organisation wide thing. He notes also that some teams have an expectation of more hours than others.

I’d echo what @Northernsoullover said and encourage you to start setting boundaries on your time.

I’m also in legal and would say yes - that is the industry.
Interestingly I’m about to leave private practice for an in house role hoping for a better work/life balance (and just a change of scene) - but I also don’t expect it to be a doddle!

Certain industries have a certain culture around hours worked, presenteeism etc., so in the NFP role, this may at least be taken away.

However it also comes down to personality. If you are driven, ambitious and diligent, which it sounds like you are, you’ll probably find you end up doing so in a different work environment, just for less pay. But if you’re really unhappy maybe it’s worth a try?

@SpuduIika

*Those jobs don't exist "part-time " You can't just drop some hours*

I know plenty of people in that bracket who work four days a week, some as few as three.

I’ve posted my salary elsewhere on this thread and I could reduce my hours/days if I wished.

So these jobs do exist, despite your sweeping claim otherwise.

I meant specifically in law

We’ll you are in a fortunate position in that you can manage on a lot less money so time to evaluate what really matters at this point in your life. It’s different for everyone so there’s no right or wrong answer. I am civil service, very modest pay but flexible and enables me to actually see my young family. I couldn’t compromise on that part of my life as they are my life right here, right now. But at the same time, I’m not motivated by work, don’t have a desire to be challenged or reach my earnings potential. That makes it somewhat easier for me.

I'm in tech as well and definitely have 2-3 hours free a day to do my hobbies. Start work around 9.30ish and always finish before 6.
On similar wage to OP

DH moved into the NFP sector from the private sector when the dc were young. His income went down a lot but he gained so much in flexibility of hours and less stress.

He's still in the NFP sector and he's in a more senior role, so better pay (but nothing like 6 figures) and longer hours but still less stress.

I've also worked for a small charity previously. Really supportive atmosphere with great flexibility. But appalling pay. It was the right thing to do when the dc were younger but my pension has really suffered as a result.

ATM you are in a comfortable position financially . You have choices .Could you work a 4 day week? Maybe do a job share? Children are small for a short time (doesnt always feel like it). I think most jobs equate to longer working hours once you are on a higher wage .

Going slightly against grain here - I don't agree high pay = long hours. I'm a high earner by your definition but I work roughly the same hours as the juniors in my team. I'm paid more for my 20 odd years of experience, management skills and the fact my role is a lot higher exposure and impact than theirs. If it was purely because I'm slogging away for more hours then they could just replace me

But then I don't work in law... so maybe can't comment

IME you could be on a quarter of your current salary and be just as stressed and overworked. The similar role in the NFP sector could just be the same amount of work and stress but without the benefit of higher pay.

Also lol at all the posters suggesting it's always an option to go part time. I work in a very flexible company but it just wouldn't work in my role. I don't think anyone in the company is PT.

it really depends, on your job but also your boundaries and organisation. my salary is similyto yours, i work maximum 45 hours per week, but i’m super organised, have strict boundaries and the 40-45 h are full on

No, it doesn't. It means you put in long hours only when needed but not all the time. I earn 6 figures and work 9.30-6pm. If there is a big project then there can be weeks where I'll work until 10/11 at night and have to work weekends maybe once or twice a year. But it's definitely just an intense period and not something I do often.

I’m a senior sister on ICU. I work a minimum 60 hw because we are so short staffed and everybody thinks Covid has gone away. It hasn’t. I’m 43 and have been doing this since I qualified. I get paid about £43k. I don’t get a company car, private health, overtime or a bonus. I’ll be working a 12 hour shift on Christmas Day. I have 3 kids and a husband. Please explain what a weekend is ?. Perhaps I should retrain as a lorry driver !

NFP will be just as much work but less pay.

Really OP you need to just go part time and stick to it.

Feel well placed to post-I'm C level in a biz (but part time ) and my husband is a senior in house lawyer. I was previous in NFP

In summary yes - it is expected and I don't know any one else that doesn't do long hours. As you get more senior you can flex for family events but you make time back. I'm often away for work overnight (pre Covid ).NFP is as hard without the money

I have a lot of cleaning help and good childcare. My kids are getting to the stage when childcare could be thing of the past. Will replace by part time housekeeper. My husband does the school run / drops at clubs etc and is active parent but a lot of mental load falls to me and I find it exhausting. We are working as a team to hand ownership of some stuff to him.
The only way I think you can be senior and part time is to job share. This is what I do - I still do 40 plus hours but full time this would be closer to 65 hours and my part time salary is still incredibly good

@CheshireSplat

It doesn’t have to, but it depends where you sit in the organisation. I’m a GC so I now have much more time and flexibility than when I reported into the GC. Of course there are pressure points.

Generally speaking I work about 9 hours per day with the flexibility to pick DC up from school etc.

Sorry to add - PM me if you need more help

Have you looked at civil service op? Pay won't be anywhere near good (I think our lawyers are G7s so £55k but very good pension, more opportunities when leading a team etc, some might be G6s which would be £65k) excellent work life balance, I work closely with our lawyers and they seem to take as many lunch breaks and flex as the rest of us!

And don't move to NFP unless an absolute calling: no budget for projects or recruitment. Everything will be done on a shoestring including your T&E.