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Original poster

Employer have said I have resigned - I haven't. Urgent help please!

999 replies

Titslikepicassos · 06/11/2020 18:25

I have a loooong thread in AIBU and received excellent support but things have escalated.

Long story short, I went on maternity leave this time last year. I had issues at work throughout my pregnancy, being shouted at and sidelined and told to move locations. Sorted it all out informally.

In March I asked to return to work early from Mat leave due to financial issues caused by lockdown. At this point my boss attempted to move me again, that didn't work and she then went back on the hours she had given me and it messed up my childcare.

I raised a formal grievance and put a flexible working request in at the same time. The company failed to do anything with my request and the grievance process was mismanaged and a data breach occurred in the middle of it, where my grievance letter was upload to a public file and seen by others.

The grievance was upheld in parts but they again tried to move me to a new location which doesnt work due to childcare issues.

I requested mediation with my boss in order to go back to work as I'm still not back 7 months later.

Today the regional director has said that they won't honour mediation and I have now resigned.

My union rep has disappeared and I received this at 16:00 today so couldn't get hold of ACAS.

Any advice would be very welcome!

OP posts:
KleineDracheKokosnuss · 29/01/2021 07:59

They should be communicating via your solicitor, not direct with you. And it should be their solicitor doing the communicating, not them.

I hate when clients do this. It cocks up whatever sensible strategy I have devised.

Hope it goes well for you.

NoWordForFluffy · 29/01/2021 08:43

I would imagine they're trying not to run up a massive legal bill. A strategy that is likely to backfire and cost more in the long run.

TheMobileSiteMadeMeSignup · 29/01/2021 12:38

I feel like I'm doing nothing! Just stubbornly not blinking first.

Sometimes it's the best strategy. I managed to get a new policy ripped up and re-written at my work because I would not let it go. Stay strong.

We sort of unofficially have made Fridays no-home school day, might be worth having an extra long weekend once in a while to de-stress from trying to make kids do school work at home.

updownroundandround · 01/02/2021 18:02

@Titslikepicassos

You're doing SO well OP !

I am in awe of your tenacity [wow]

Maybe after this is finally resolved you should change your username to ''Tenacity of a Bulldog'' Grin

You hang on in there Flowers

katmarie · 01/02/2021 22:31

@tits, sometimes winning an employment dispute is all about having the courage, determination and sheer bloody mindedness to not blink first. When all this is over, you might want to look at ACAS for jobs, they recruit employment advisers regularly and offer a lot of training. Your experience could be really valuable in advising others.

LemonBreeland · 02/02/2021 10:31

I've followed your story from your original thread on and off. And I just want to say, I'm so sorry you are still having such a tough time so many months later. I really hope you get what you deserve and it doesn't drag on too long.

Iwillneverbesatisfied · 02/02/2021 14:16

Yeah my union solicitors were really cautious too. Annoyingly so. I had so much evidence. My union official ended up saying more or less "fuck it, I'll deal with your case for you" and he did all the negotiations etc and only brought the solicitor in when he had to. I got a great payout and as I've said before, if I wasn't already married, I'd marry him. He was amazing and without going into too much details, he's a literal lifesaver.

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 02/02/2021 15:37

Thanks everyone.

Not much to update, but I appreciate everyone's input and advice.

Still sat here not blinking and hoping that the solicitor won't blink for me! Having googled her, she is incredibly experienced and comes very highly regarded. She's used a lot by news channels for expert opinion on employment issues. However, I imagine her hands are tied somewhat when working with a union.

Since starting this post, she's been in contact and outlined her plan of action. Baby steps towards the end of this - hopefully!

OP posts:
NoWordForFluffy · 02/02/2021 15:39

Does she suggest making another offer / holding firm with your offer? Or not blinking at all?

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 02/02/2021 15:51

@NoWordForFluffy

Does she suggest making another offer / holding firm with your offer? Or not blinking at all?
To begin with, she's asking for the reason why they rejected the first offer.
OP posts:
ilovemydogandMrObama · 02/02/2021 16:06

Don't think a solicitor would have their hands tied by a union as far as a settlement, as your solicitor has a duty of care to you.

The only instance when there was a bit of a cross over, that I am aware of having been a union rep, was when a union member was discriminated against (racial) and the union wanted to publicise the issue in the union magazine, but the solicitor put a stop to this as the legal advice was to sign an NDA, and received a large settlement. It was the best thing for the individual, and shame the details weren't able to be shared for lots of reasons, but lots of people felt the actions by the employer was wrong.

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 02/02/2021 16:26

@ilovemydogandMrObama

Don't think a solicitor would have their hands tied by a union as far as a settlement, as your solicitor has a duty of care to you.

The only instance when there was a bit of a cross over, that I am aware of having been a union rep, was when a union member was discriminated against (racial) and the union wanted to publicise the issue in the union magazine, but the solicitor put a stop to this as the legal advice was to sign an NDA, and received a large settlement. It was the best thing for the individual, and shame the details weren't able to be shared for lots of reasons, but lots of people felt the actions by the employer was wrong.

I've been told that, after a preliminary hearing, if the company offers a settlement that the solicitor thinks is fair, even if I don't agree with the offer, I have to take it or I risk losing representation.
OP posts:
RandomMess · 02/02/2021 16:56

I'm sure their reasons for rejecting will be ridiculous and made up...

Alternista · 02/02/2021 17:11

I can’t believe this is still going on, you poor thing. Well done for not caving.

NoWordForFluffy · 02/02/2021 18:10

I've been told that, after a preliminary hearing, if the company offers a settlement that the solicitor thinks is fair, even if I don't agree with the offer, I have to take it or I risk losing representation.

Yes, that's standard with solicitors.

ilovemydogandMrObama · 02/02/2021 18:17

Ah, yes after preliminary hearing, but would suggest that for the most part the union would take the solicitor's view. For instance, your case was given a, 'reasonable prospect of success,' by the union solicitors, and think this clause of the possibility of losing representation is to ensure that union members understand that they cannot pursue a case endlessly.

Am fairly sure this will settle out of court based on the fact that the company will not wish to air dirty laundry in public

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 02/02/2021 18:38

I imagine the chance of it getting all the way to ET are slim. They've wanted this cleared up since they terminated my employment - here's hoping their final offer meets mine!

If it wasn't so stressful, it would be quite exciting Confused

OP posts:
RhapsodyandAshe · 03/02/2021 14:29

Fingers and toes still crossed for you!

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 03/02/2021 21:08

Thanks @RhapsodyandAshe Smile

My solicitor was in touch today. The company haven't used their solicitor for the settlement agreement, they've been working alone. Their solicitor is now involved as mine has refused to negotiate with the company.

So my schedule of loss has been sent.

I've had my SAR back - incomplete, again

OP posts:
justilou1 · 03/02/2021 21:22

The solicitor probably refuses to meet with idiots. I suspect their solicitor wishes that he/she had known what they were taking on at the time, too.

RandomMess · 03/02/2021 21:25

Yet more incompetentence

Smallgoon · 03/02/2021 21:48

The fact that the SAR has twice been returned incomplete is telling. I hope you have escalated this to the ICO, and I hope your solicitor informs their solicitor that an agreement cannot be made until the SAR is returned (in full).

BlueThistles · 04/02/2021 03:28

@Titslikepicassos

Thanks *@RhapsodyandAshe* Smile

My solicitor was in touch today. The company haven't used their solicitor for the settlement agreement, they've been working alone. Their solicitor is now involved as mine has refused to negotiate with the company.

So my schedule of loss has been sent.

I've had my SAR back - incomplete, again

very telling Flowers
DifficultBloodyWoman · 04/02/2021 04:27

@justilou1

The solicitor probably refuses to meet with idiots. I suspect their solicitor wishes that he/she had known what they were taking on at the time, too.
I suspect when they actually instruct a solicitor or pull legal into this, things will suddenly start going your way. Well, I hope so, anyway.
fizzandchips · 04/02/2021 06:47

I hope now that their solicitor is involved you’ll see progress.

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