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Original poster

Employer have said I have resigned - I haven't. Urgent help please!

999 replies

Titslikepicassos · 06/11/2020 18:25

I have a loooong thread in AIBU and received excellent support but things have escalated.

Long story short, I went on maternity leave this time last year. I had issues at work throughout my pregnancy, being shouted at and sidelined and told to move locations. Sorted it all out informally.

In March I asked to return to work early from Mat leave due to financial issues caused by lockdown. At this point my boss attempted to move me again, that didn't work and she then went back on the hours she had given me and it messed up my childcare.

I raised a formal grievance and put a flexible working request in at the same time. The company failed to do anything with my request and the grievance process was mismanaged and a data breach occurred in the middle of it, where my grievance letter was upload to a public file and seen by others.

The grievance was upheld in parts but they again tried to move me to a new location which doesnt work due to childcare issues.

I requested mediation with my boss in order to go back to work as I'm still not back 7 months later.

Today the regional director has said that they won't honour mediation and I have now resigned.

My union rep has disappeared and I received this at 16:00 today so couldn't get hold of ACAS.

Any advice would be very welcome!

OP posts:
Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 22/01/2021 14:15

Second ET1 submitted

I haven't given a counter offer - their negotiating skills are all backwards. I'll send my schedule of loss to them if they chase me for an offer - it's significantly higher than what I would take to walk away.

OP posts:
NoWordForFluffy · 22/01/2021 18:33

You might speed it up if you send it and say that your first offer is also your counter offer.

NoProblem123 · 23/01/2021 12:42

I’m disgusted on your behalf OP.

Having worked with HR/SLT in several roles, don’t underestimate the term ‘the blind leading the blind’.

Also, what looks like incompetence can actually be perfectly qualified HR staff making sure SLT get what they want, regardless of legalities. It’s not as if they’re neutral is it.
Same for those whose job it is to process SARs/IARs unfortunately.

Smallgoon · 27/01/2021 10:52

Is there an update OP?

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 27/01/2021 17:27

@Smallgoon

Is there an update OP?
Not really!

The union solicitors have taken on my case after months of reviewing it. The company are keen for me to make a counter offer but I haven't done anything yet.

OP posts:
WeeDangerousSpike · 27/01/2021 19:32

I agree with PP about making your counter offer the same as your earlier offer. Unless of course, having done all the calcs you think it should be more!

I'd love to be a fly on the wall if you increase it, actually!

incenseandpeppermints · 27/01/2021 19:55

Your loss of earnings will be increasing over time so your counter offer should be higher to reflect this.

RandomMess · 27/01/2021 20:12

I really want you to increase it. Wasn't your schedule of loss higher?

Also had daily interest on!!!

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 27/01/2021 20:16

I need to leave it with my solicitor for now - they're going to be in contact to discuss our next steps. However, it seems to be a slow process!

Big relief that they've taken it on though, I'd been warned that union solicitors are overly cautious with their assessments and take on few cases.

OP posts:
Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 27/01/2021 20:22

@RandomMess

I really want you to increase it. Wasn't your schedule of loss higher?

Also had daily interest on!!!

schedule of loss was around double of what I asked for in settlement - but was maximum ET awards, middle vento band and all the uplifts for not following ACAS procedures.

Big risk to let it go all the way to ET though!

OP posts:
umpteennamechanges · 27/01/2021 20:57

Also try the charity Pregnant Then Screwed who may be able to help

umpteennamechanges · 27/01/2021 20:59

Sorry. Ignore. Just seen I am massively late to thread.

ilovemydogandMrObama · 28/01/2021 11:00

Just wanted to add that as a union rep, I have seen re instatement at a very late stage, so it is possible, especially in a large corporate company where an employee can effectively have a, 'new start.'

They will want to avoid having to explain a large settlement to any regulator.

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 28/01/2021 12:28

@ilovemydogandMrObama

Just wanted to add that as a union rep, I have seen re instatement at a very late stage, so it is possible, especially in a large corporate company where an employee can effectively have a, 'new start.'

They will want to avoid having to explain a large settlement to any regulator.

I have ticked the reinstatement box on the ET1. However, I imagine that will go down like a lead balloon!
OP posts:
Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 28/01/2021 12:28

@umpteennamechanges

Sorry. Ignore. Just seen I am massively late to thread.
Thanks though Grin
OP posts:
justilou1 · 28/01/2021 13:20

You are kicking arse! I’m so proud of you!!!

ilovemydogandMrObama · 28/01/2021 13:24

@Titslikepicassos - You would be surprised how much happens without the knowledge of HR/Legal. Depending on the structure, settlements need to be signed off by a Director, and I don't just mean the Regional Director who terminated you, but as in one of the Board of Directors.

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 28/01/2021 15:58

@justilou1

You are kicking arse! I’m so proud of you!!!
I feel like I'm doing nothing! Just stubbornly not blinking first.
OP posts:
Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 28/01/2021 16:05

[quote ilovemydogandMrObama]@Titslikepicassos - You would be surprised how much happens without the knowledge of HR/Legal. Depending on the structure, settlements need to be signed off by a Director, and I don't just mean the Regional Director who terminated you, but as in one of the Board of Directors.[/quote]
For such a large company, the structure is small.

I don't know if you've seen my update about the restructure to my old management team that happened immediately after my termination?

OP posts:
picklemewalnuts · 28/01/2021 17:30

I pop in to see what's happening every time it pops up in active. I'm so sorry this has dragged on and on for you. What's life actually like at the moment? Are you managing to enjoy your time with your DD? It's really important, round the edges of all this stress, that you make life as enjoyable as you can, look after yourself and focus on something other than this horrendous stress fest!

Original poster
Titslikepicassos · 28/01/2021 19:41

@picklemewalnuts

I pop in to see what's happening every time it pops up in active. I'm so sorry this has dragged on and on for you. What's life actually like at the moment? Are you managing to enjoy your time with your DD? It's really important, round the edges of all this stress, that you make life as enjoyable as you can, look after yourself and focus on something other than this horrendous stress fest!
Thanks @picklemewalnuts! I'm trying to see the positives and enjoy the time with the kids but I have serious lockdown fatigue and homeschooling is beyond awful.

The company have been emailing me and my solicitor today. Still asking for a counter offer to their counter offer. Their solicitor is no where to be seen.

OP posts:
BlueThistles · 29/01/2021 01:08

OP you're showing true courage in the face of all this crap ... hold on tight.. Flowers

justilou1 · 29/01/2021 03:45

Does it become harassment if this keeps up?

Nat6999 · 29/01/2021 04:36

Re your payments, they can send an amended P45 (exHMRC)

Taikoo · 29/01/2021 05:16

You have a great case against them.
Sounds like constructive dismissal.
Keep everything and stay in contact with them and HR.
Contact ACAS and keep on at your union.
Do not let this go.