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Original poster

Quick, Should I walk out of this contract? SORELY tempted to tell them to shove it...

136 replies

WideWebWitch · 28/05/2004 11:00

Eeek, talked about my wanker boss here . and it hasn't got any better, except he hasn't been here much. Now I have a meeting on Tuesday with him during which I'm fairly convinced he'll piss me off even more. I'm absolutely dreading it. This week I've been deluged by sharp, rude emails, some of which are asking me to update on stuff I haven't even been asked to do! And then getting short with me for not having done it! I've been replying to say er, you didn't ask me to do this. I promise I'm not crap, honestly I'm not - he's just awful, disorganised, a control freak. My predecessor said she felt dread at the idea of work on the days he was in the office. I feel physically sick at the idea of coming to work on Tuessday and I'm not a wimp, honest. Shall I go off sick for a few days, starting now, instead of telling them to stuff it? Any advice appreciated, am really getting myself in a state. No time to preview, sorry if this is garbled.

OP posts:
roisin · 28/05/2004 11:51

Wow - in awe of PPH.

WWW - whatever you decide, do keep reviewing it. I had a dreadful boss for one job; hated it and him from week 1, but had loads of reasons not to quit. I stayed in the job for 3 years and looking back constantly regret that I did. My next job was fab, and I loved every minute of it, and my boss was superb. Life's too short to waste - so if you don't get any success from the excellent suggestions here, don't suffer in silence ... move on. There will be loads more opportunities out there where you wil be appreciated.

princesspeahead · 28/05/2004 11:52

be very careful what you put in email, it has a habit of being forwarded. the second post needs to be told to the boss orally! Don't send it to him! First one, fine

Enid · 28/05/2004 11:52

Just caught up with this, so sorry you are having a tough time of it, can't you rehearse pph's speech and say it verbatim, its brilliant. X E

princesspeahead · 28/05/2004 11:56

got to dash off now www but I'm rooting for you and gagging to know what reply you get. Just remember - all the boss knows about you is what you tell him, so go in there and tell him you are good, tell him he should be listening to you and taking your advice, and then he will. And remember that wanky will be making someone else feel sick about going to work in a month if you don't scupper or at least wound him now!!
Go get him girl!

KeyCODDYplayer · 28/05/2004 11:57

ill text you pph

willow2 · 28/05/2004 12:18

Saw this on active list - and hoped, desperately, that it wasn't you, WWW. All I can say is do as pph says. You have nothing to lose - you can't stay in the job as it stands, so do everything you can to bring this dickhead's behaviour to his superiors' attention. Hopefully, in doing so, you will end up with a job you like - but, at the very least, you will have whacked him with a metaphorical brick.

Original poster
WideWebWitch · 28/05/2004 12:38

About to send it and drive home crying. Thanks all, I'll let you know what happens

OP posts:
ks · 28/05/2004 12:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

KeyCODDYplayer · 28/05/2004 12:49

no crying..

can you copy on tot here what you email?

marthamoo · 28/05/2004 13:09

Oh WWW, missed all this 'til today. Zilch by way of experience/words of wisdom, just wanted to say poor you and much sympathy. Good luck, hon xx

PPH, you are one scary lady. Respect!

Batters · 28/05/2004 13:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

serenequeen · 28/05/2004 13:23

hi there

i too agree with pph's advice, excellent posts. i've just caught up with this and was dreading to read that you had walked out by the time i got to the end!

i think you shouldn't resign until you've at least had the communication with boss's boss that pph suggests and also involved/spoken to hr.

i just worry that if you walk out without having done this you will get a devastating knock to your confidence which will carry over into other jobs... by all accounts it is difficult returning to the workplace after time out and i know you have been enjoying being back at work (other than dealing with this charmer).

i would just say take a deep breath before doing anything hasty. have a good think about it over the weekend and implement a course of action on tuesday if you don't manage it this pm.

of course if you speak to boss's boss and hr and nothing improves, you can still resign, but you will have the satisfaction of having done everything in your power to address the situation and will know that you have retained your professionalism under great provocation even if he hasn't.

you can of course start looking for something else straightaway.

i'm so sorry to read things haven't got any better

have a wonderful weekend with dp and the kids, hugs sqxxx

motherinferior · 28/05/2004 13:27

Oh babe, just seen this, huuuuuuuuggggggssssssss
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

bran · 28/05/2004 14:10

It's so miserable to work for someone horrible isn't it? I think pph's advice is excellent - in fact I think you should go and work for her. If you do end up leaving please make sure that the manager's boss knows why. There is a manager where I work (fortunately not my manager) who has lost 3 staff in the last 2 months because he's so impossible to work for. None of the leavers told the managing director that they were leaving because of this manager so of course nothing will improve.

Sadly, from what I've read about him, I don't think he's going to improve no matter what you do but at least higher management will be aware of the problem. I think you're doing really well - don't let the bastard grind you down.

prufrock · 28/05/2004 14:38

Really can't add anything to the wonderful advice you've already got but do hope you get a satisfactory outcome. You don't need this particular job, and if it's making you this upset you really shouldn't be there, but it would be wonderful to right royally screw the tosser before you go.

sis · 28/05/2004 14:40

WWW, I'm really sorry that the idiotic boss is still making things miserable for you but am impressed with the fantastic advice from PPH! WWW, I hope you have a good weekend and get a good result from the e-mail.

Original poster
WideWebWitch · 28/05/2004 14:43

Thanks! Am home (not walked out, just told boss's pa and HR that I'm ill but they know I'm not) now, having sent the email which reads as follows:

Dear Mr Top Boss

I would be grateful for 20 mins of your time to discuss issues with my line manager, Tosser McToss. I enjoy working for [name of firm] and would like to continue to [specify what you are doing] for the remainder of my contract period, but am not prepared to do so unless:

  • the work and updates that I produce are acknowledged and read to avoid the situation detailed in the document attached (I inserted my one pager about the stats board here as sent to tosser when it happened);

  • my authority is not undermined (wrongly, unprofessionally and unnecessarily) in front of my team - see attached;

I am not asked for work which I have not been asked to do (emails received yesterday);

I am dealt with at all times in the courteous and professional manner that I accord to others.

I am sorry to have to involve you in this, but I the manner in which Tosser McToss manages his team is something that needs addressing, both in relation to my ability to complete my contract and in relation to the [name of department]'s ability to fulfil their potential for the benefit of the firm going forward. The above is an example but is not my only cause for concern

I look forward to hearing from you. My mobile no is 12345678.
Regards
www

I had a message from him as I was driving home (I was out of signal) so I'm about to ring him back and calmly tell it like it is. May have pph's post in front of me as I do it. Thanks, will let you know how it goes. I am going back in on Tuesday and absolutely will not let this little bloke get the better of me.

OP posts:
kalex · 28/05/2004 14:45

Good for you!

Now relax for the rest of the weekend and don't think about it.

Janh · 28/05/2004 14:46

GOOD GIRL!!!!!

Let us know about your return call and then please have a lovely weekend.

pamina3 · 28/05/2004 14:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tamum · 28/05/2004 14:48

Only just read this latest thread, but may I just say: Give me five, www! Fantastic letter, esp. the name. Such a shame you couldn't use it in the real thing, but it's dignified and to the point. Hope it lands Tosser in the poo.

CountessDracula · 28/05/2004 14:48

GO GIRL!!

PPH what fantastic advice you have given, remind me never to buy the house next door to you and get involved in a boundary dispute.....

oliveoil · 28/05/2004 15:07

Fantastic, feeling all empowered on your behalf .

eefs · 28/05/2004 15:15

PPH, I've just seen this. Wow, how beautifully articulate and unoffending while getting straight to the point - I wish I could write like that.

WWW I'm delighted you sent the email and can't wait to hear the response

Mumsnet is more compelling than a soap!

willow2 · 28/05/2004 16:12

Hope phone call goes/went ok. Let us know the outcome XX

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