Would you leave a £250,000pa job to be a SAHM?

[misosoup]

Ok, I've changed my name for this, not quite sure why....

I really enjoy my job and it is pretty well paid but since I returned to work after having DD2 I have been thinking a lot about this.

I can afford not to work, dh's income is nothing like mine but still above average although it will clearly be a huge drop in our standard of living.

And I miss the kids do much during the day... I spend 2 hours per day with them plus weekends. There is no way I can cut my hours any more and part-time is out of the question.

But I have worked so hard to get here, against all odds. I don't want to throw it all away.

Excuse my rudeness, but I feel strongly about this. No mum should be forced to leave her young children in childcare because society says that everyone has to work and pay their way.

How about fair pay for workers? If my dh was on a fair wage I wouldn't have to work!

Single mums should be at home to care for their children and if I earned enough I would not mind paying for that. Putting those children into childcare does not help the children or the mother.

What family values? Where? What bloody family? How can you have a family when you spend more time at work than you do with your children?

I'm now questioning myself on my last post. Maybe Uwilla would work irrespective of whether she could afford to sah or not????

I'm off to make tea.

To be perfectly honest, I would still choose to work if I were not financially strapped (and I am financially strapped). However, I would work a lot less. But, I simply can't afford it. So I work work work.

You know what I think the real problem is? The cost of living. It's so hard to actually buy a place to live, have some saving, pay the taxes and then have anything leftover for say a new pair of shoes that people are bitter. If it wasn't so expensive it wouldn't be so difficult to share some of what I work for.

I can appreciate the argument that you are contributing to society because you are raising your child. But, I just get so frustrated with my 50 hour weeks and all of my income goes to childcare and groceries and some clothes for the kids. I need a new car. I can't afford it. I want to get on the property ladder. That's a joke. Savings? What are those. Just what exactly am I working for 50 hours a week? Nothing, I tell ya. I have nothing.

I think we'd all be a lot happier if it wasn't so bloody expensive just to get by here.

Hmm

Sounds like you need that new job
How about this (prob no more than you earn now though)

Find me a job, CD, while you're at it...

Ok willow what are you after?

so Uwila

if people left their kids to go look after someone else's kids so that they too could be a childminder to someone else's, would that be okay?

You could get three or four mums together, all swop kids at 9am, and pay each other a wage. that would be okay by your standards wouldn't it, since they'd all be working as childminders?

isn't raising kids work unless it is paid?

Actually, childming is a great way to stay home with your kids and make some money by looking after some other kids as well. So, a very good idea, Cappucino.

Rhubarb - you can actually work up to 6 hrs with a 20 min break - see regs here:

Rest breaks - a break during your working day

The regulations give you a right to one rest break during your working day. A lunch or coffee break can count as your rest break. Additional breaks might be given by your contract of employment. There's no statutory right to 'smoking breaks'.

If you're an adult worker (ie over 18), you'll normally have the right to a 20 minute rest break if you're expected to work for more than six hours at a stretch.

fromhere

so I think that you could work your 5 hrs and finish without a break - it would save you a small amount of childcare

oh and mean an hour a day more with ds

what irritates me more than anything is other women criticising the idea that mothers should have a right to choose

is this what feminism has brought us? Xenia, Uwila and the Pussycat Dolls?

so ulwila, I take it you don't get tax credits? or help with childcare costs?

well then you must have quite a considerable income because, as far as I am aware, couples can still claim some tax credits even if they're earning £52000 (or something like that figure) ok it probably wont be that much, but judging by your attitude towards the taxpayer having to pay towards other's tax credit, I presume you don't get any.

If that is the case (obviously correct me if I am wrong on that) then I don't have much sympathy for your plead of poverty!

It carries on and on this thread - thanks miso for starting it.

... benefits... Governmetn now I think interviews single mothers when the youngest starts full time school to encourage them into work. We don't quite have workfare for benefits yet though.

Other relevant issue as someone mentioned abroad... I was next to a man from Finland the other week at lunch. He lives here and is amazed at the cost of childcare. His friend at home was complaining the state provided child care place had just gone up to £1250 per year (they do pay 60%+ tax though). We don't have the state subsidy for care here which has a big impact on parents' ability if they so choose to return to work.

well said cappucino!

Oh look Xenia is back.

Mind if I ask where you live, Xenia? Are you coming to the Christmas party?

I don't think you should not have the right to choose. Go on and stay home -- if you can fund that choice. If you want other people to fund it, then that is not fair.

Think the brick wall was for me, Fio.

Don't think I would venture to a mumnet event. I only came on here because a journalist wanted some quotes form me about the subject about which we are not allowed to write.