F*****g Goverment! Im so upset - I dont know what to do

[MammyShirl]

I just called Inland Revenue and they said we are not entitled to any help with childcare so basically I can't afford to work and I cant afford to not work. I don?t understand this government, they don?t seem to want to help people who want to help themselves. They just waste money on no-hopers!

I might as well chuck my boyfriend out, leave my job and say I'm homeless to get any help, and on the way damage my leg so I can be registered disabled and get a free car - its sad but true!

So what's next for people who don?t get help with childcare - where do us people who want and need to work stand? Is there no government funded nurseries?

What are my options?

We earn what I consider low wages well under 30k, we are in a lot of debt and just about makes ends meet each month, we dont earn enough to pay our bills we just balance it. i work part time and we need the money. my mother looks fter my dd but is now finding it difficult so i need to get my dd into a nursery, ive been looking for a couple of weeks and yesterday, trailed arouns chiswick/acton from 10 - 5pm, i was so tired, they are so expensive and i really stupidly thought we would get some help with the costs - but no! nothing! so what do i do now, we cant live on my dh wages, we cant afford to pay the nursery costs as it costs two thirds of my monthly wage. i am desperate, what the f* is this goverment up to. when i lived in australua they really take care of you, their money is well spent and not wasted on no-hopers like it is here. im sorry but i cant express or say what i really want to say as i will come across arrogant and racist which im not im just saying what is true! the goverment needs to start taking care and putting people first who want to help themselves, they really do have their priorities wrong.

im so anrgy and i feel so low, my debts feel like a ton of bricks on my shoulders, i work hard and always have, i dont spend much, i dont have much. i pay rent, my bills and ive worked since 14, i see people from school living in nicely decorated houses, do they work? - no! they get all because they can, because they choose to cheat the system, but who is they clever one? not me the mug! i should learn a lesson from them that i cant fight this system i should just join it or suffer in silence as no-one wants to hear from me unless im disabled, homless, single or a refugee. sure they need help but what about all the falling people around them, soon we will be in the same boat as homeless people an dthen they will have to help me and it would cost alot more then it would if they just gave me some f help now so i can look afte rmy family.

i just want to screaaaaaaaaaaaaam!

sorry if i offend anyone but we should be allowed to say what we feel, i dont hate anyone just the goverment.

Just the sort of thing to get you going isn't it custy?

Hope I'm not in for a virtual tongue lashing....

hello again
before anyone starts getting angry at my comments i made when i started this thread - just want to say it was the day before i was due on, i was very upset and worried and my words didn't put across what i wanted to say so dont read into them too much.
Bozza - thanks for your help, i think i will try combine my card debts onto a new one.

I've just trawled through this mammoth thread. A few things I thought of on the way...

mammyshirl - paying debts off is deinitely the way to go. If you've ever looked at 'The Motley Fool' website, that's the first thing they suggest. It's worth looking there actually, they have a lot of good advice. It's here .

I believe it is statistically proven that people generally spend what they earn, as aloha said - if you earn more, you are likely to spend it, and I'm sure I've read that on average people have a much more similar amount left over at the end of the month than you would expect. I know dh and I have been surprised by how our spending has accommodated a downturn in our earnings when the children were each born.

Private education and income are subjects almost guaranteed to start arguments I think. What I get most frustrated by is that my salary could be paid directly to the nursery. Now this will change when ds is 3 in the summer, so that probably ought to be factored into the equation when calculating how much help is available, because that really will make a big difference to me.

mammyshirl - be very careful about doing that! It's MUCH MUCH MUCH better to go through a bank or building society than any of these companys you see on the adverts ' consolidate your debts into one manageable payment' etc. I think the best way is to incorporate it into your mortgage. You need to look at the interest rates really carefully, and not just starting rates, but how they would change over time. Good luck, and well done for taking charge of things!

thank you musica - i'll check that website out tonight when i get home.

i dont have a mortgage - wishi did then at least all this money wasted would be going to some use. thats whole other story, i cant ever imagine being able to get a mortgage.

what i dont understand is our friends pay less a month on their mortage then we do on rent so why cant we get a mortgage as they see we manage to pay the rent?

It's something to do with people not realising how lucky they are isn't it Custy................

what you saying cam?

Are you sure you wouldn't be able to get one mammyshirl. Because its true that renting is a very expensive business. When DH and I bought our first two bed townhouse the mortgage (95%) was similar to what I was forking out for a much smaller two bed flat with no outdoor area in a worse area.

i dont know anything about mortages - sound like an idiot
i should get my ass in gear really and look into it, do you know if i can get free advice?

When we bought a house we got advice from an IfA attached to the estate agents we bought the house from. The IfA gets a fee from the mortgage company you go with - but as far as I can see they all offer it so the IfA shouldn't be biased. Could you express interest in a modest house in your area and get an appt with the IfA?

Mammyshirl, buying property is definitely a good idea. You will pay a lot less than you do in rent. I can highly recommend our mortgage broker. He's in west london (north acton) and not only really good at what he does, but honest and pleasant. We walked into his office with lots of things that didn't look good on paper (my dh earning cash and all my income from the usa) and he sorted out a mortgage for us on the spot. He charges a fee, but not until you actually get a mortgage (ie the advice is free until you actually buy a place). Anyway, his name is Dick Ladwa (though you can speak to anyone in his office...they are all smart and nice) and the phone number is 020.8749.6006.

By the way, have you looked into state nurseries attached to your local primary school. They can be really good and FREE!

how old is your dd mammyshirl?

misdee -
sorry just logged on since yesterday afternoon.
my dd is 10 months old.

sofiames - ill speak to my dh tonight and look into it.

thanks

mammyshirl,

Obviously don't know your financial circumstances and there may be reasons why you are turned down for a mortgage although if you are able to get credit cards it seems a little inconsistent on the part of lenders. Renting is relatively expensive but from the Lenders' point of view you would be paying a mortgage over an extended period of time and ability to pay rent in the short time is not in itself enough security.

Anyway was wondering if you had ever looked into Housing Association or part ownership schemes which may enable you to get a foot on the property ladder whilst reducing your outgoings overall. Might be worth enquiring if there is anything in your area ?

In the short term tackle your debts first. Some areas have advice centres, staffed by volunteers, which may be attached to CAB, and deal with all sorts of issues from benefits, debts, employment issues, legal disputes etc. Again worth trying to see whether there is a more efficient way of dealing with your problems, as a third party might have a more objective approach.

Mammyshirl watch out with this "mortgages cost less than rent" trap

At the moment interest rates are very very low, if they increase you could end up paying double what you did now for your mortgage and end up being reposessed.

And I have noticed that it is acutally cheaper to rent than to be a first time buyer in a lot of areas lately. Your friends may well have equity in their property, ie for eg when they bought the flat it was £100k, now worth £250k but their mortgage is still on the £100k. Make sure you cost it all out properly!

Just as an example, at the moment to borrow £200,000 (which won't buy you much in Chiswick!) over 25 years would cost you £1180 a month.

If interest rates doubled (which has happened before and worse) it would cost £1830 a month and if they got to the levels they did in the late 80s it would cost you..... £3050 a month!!!

Even a 1% rate hike will mean your mortgage would go up to £1303, an extra 125 a month which is a lot on a tight budget.

countessdracula - that sounds scary, maybe i am better off for now renting. so now is not a good time then? i live in surrey, my dh works in acton and thats why we where looking for nurseries in the areas surrounding acton like chiswick. by your calculations we def could not afford a mortgage for £200,000.

lizs - im already on the housing register and the shared ownership register, it works on a points system and we only have 30 points so basically we will probably never be offered anything - thats what the housing officer said!?!?

Did anyone else get a cheque for milk money off the goverment just before xmas ?? I thought it was a joke at first. My partner works full time and we have 3 kids 2 of which are under 5. Apparently some time last year someone at inland revenue accidently changed the rules on geting milk tokens (you only usually get them on income support and job seekers i think). They included people on wftc by mistake and some people were sent them. It was 4 months before anyone discovered the mistake and they sent me a cheque for 107 pounds because i didn't get sent any tokens. Confusing I know. Why tell me if i didn't know.

Nutty - I didn't - but did you spend it?? If so how many pints of milk did you get

LOL DSW

Actually i spent it on xmas pressies, but i don't know anyone else that got one.

MammyShirl -- I kind of agree with both SofiaAmes & CountessDrac. Having bought a house is working out as a real pain for us, we can't easily move to a nicer neighbourhood (desperate to do this) until we sell this house, and are having trouble selling. BUT, when we do sell, we will progress towards living in a bigger house, just because of the equity we have built up by buying when we did.

The simple way to get around the problem that CD raises is to get a fixed mortgage for as long as you dare... BUT that still ties you in, has its own drawbacks. The thing is, you have time to research all the issues and learn about what the best option for you is, while you're clearing other debts in the meantime. So don't feel you need to suss it perfectly just now.

I get 10 quid a week extra tax credit because of ds1's autism. Fancy swapping mammyshirl because I would gladly believe me?

The workng bit is irrelevent. The LEA will only fund a helper for 4 nursery sessions for him, and the nursery won't take him without a helper. Not many jobs fiut roundthat. He currently goes to school for 2 hours a morning (and then is picked up and taken to nursery by me). Short of having an ability to be in 2 places at once I can;t work. Not a poor me story just a demonstration that almost without exception a disability in the family leaves the family worse off finacially (as well as the hassle of the disability).

Sorry I know others have picked you up on it, but please leave sweeping generalisations out of it.

IME the tax credit helpline tells you something different every time you speak to them.

On your salary you should be getting something though.

JimJams - Definatley agree that you can phone them 5 min apart and be told different things.
How do i get on to the calculator on line ??? I tried to do it once but couldn't find it. I'm thinking of working part time and want to find out what would happen with our money

In very summuarised form, taking into account what you have written

There are 2 tax credits available, Child tax credits (CTC) and Working Tax Credits (WTC). Where is get confusing is that WTC covers the childcare cost element. These are separate to the Child Benefit you get for each child you have.

For CTC - they do not consider your chidcare costs, it is avaliable to anyone/couple with a joint salary less than £58k p.a. At anything above £20k up to $58k you are only entitled to £545 per year (£10.40 per week) (and an additional £545 p.a if your child is under 1)

WTC (which consider childcare costs) only apply to those jointly earning less than £15k. Thus you are not entitled to any of this. (For the full entitlement of £135 per week towards childcare, you would need to have a joint income of £5060, and the amount they give you reduces by a few pence for every pound you earn over that, thats why by £15k it runs out!)

It is bloody complicated, and nowhere do they make it really clear.

Peoples statements about getting your employers to pay the childcare costs from your salary will let you save the tax on it is incorrect - you will taxed (since it is a benefit in kind) but you will save a National Insurance - which might bring in an extra £10-20 a month.

Go to the CAB they will be able to help you with the debts - they can help ask for the spreading of debts over a longer period - in the end your creditors want their money - so it is better for them to wait rather than get nothing. Go now while it is still manageable, otherwise it could quickly spiral out of control

Goodluck

PS Have you thought about asking a friend to look after your child, for a certain contribution - they may be prepared to do so you get some cash and if the amount is under £380 per month they may not have to pay tax or NI contributions and it may save you some money if they do it for less than £400 per month