Your tips please to a happy household when working ft...

[YouSmegHead]

So recently went back to work ft and haven't found my stride yet. What top tips do you have for keeping me sane

On the entrepreneurs and women who earn £1k a day thread there will be suggestions of the 4 hour working week and how to find something where you own, you run the business and you decide the hours. I certainly have found working for myself even if I do work a lot of hours at times is much much easier than working for someone else's profit.

To be fair - yes, I have picked up some useful points from this thread.

Some posts, however, have made me feel almost claustrophobic.

I genuinely wonder whether some people create more "busy-ness" in their lives than is absolutely necessary.

I send my 2 x DC (age 7 & 11) to school on a Monday with every bag of kit they need for the week (Saves thinking on a daily basis which kit they need on which day) & they get the school / public bus (saves me a fortune in fuel)

Everything gets ironed on a Saturday & hung in everyones wardrobe for the week. We all clean the house together on a Saturday morning whilst listening to music(before footy/hockey etc) otherwise no pocket money for DC.

We're on Economy12 so dishwasher & washing machine goes on at 9pm every night & emptied by DH & myself at 5.45am whilst the kettle is boiling on the aga. Clothes all hung above aga to dry whilst at work.

DH & DD shower in the eveinings, me & DS shower in the am. We all leave the house at 7.30am

Packed lunches are done & put in fridge for next day whilst cooking evening meal. No tv is allowed for DC Sun eve to & inc Thu eve. (no time anyway due to homework / after school activities etc)

A3 month view calander / family planner on wall & alarm reminders set on my phone for everything!!

I still end up shouting & screaming in the mornings but they love me!!

I find shared electronic calendar absolutely invaluable - you only have to set it up once and then it runs itself, adding an entry is really easy, just as quick as writing on a paper diary/calendar, with 2 massive advantages over it.

Both dh and I can check what's on it means we don't double book - if either is asked to do something out of regular working hours I mean - and the blessed, blessed reminders means that we don't forget things.

I do also have a year planner on the study wall, it's really handy for seeing at a glance when there's a busy period coming up.

Coffee

Shouting
Bribing
Running

I feel for you OP. I went back to work full time in April. DH also works full time. Things that work for us are:

• lay out all DD's clothes at the weekend, for the week ahead. (only 14 months old so easy to do and doesn't take up much space!)

• hang up my work outfits for the forthcoming week in order, in my wardrobe. DH looks after himself

• cook all meals for the week at the weekend and freeze in portions. I have a white board on my kitchen wall where I plan out what we're having each day...I also use this as a basis for my shopping list

• I do three or four loads of washing at the weekend, none in the week. Lights, darks, sheets, towels.

• I do all my ironing on a Sunday night with a glass of wine and watching countryfile

• I clean one room / area per night in the week, I then don't have masses to do at the weekend, and the whole house stays reasonable presentable

• DH makes his own lunch in the morning whilst looking after DD when I'm getting ready

• I make my lunch while he is getting ready....i.e. done in shifts! DD is fed at nursery so I don't have to worry about that.

However, I still run around like a headless chicken before leaving the house every day.....there is definitely room for improvement!! And if we go away for a weekend somewhere, everything goes to pot and it's chaos for the following week while I get back on track!!

Good luck!

I kind of agree with sheesh a bit...I opened the thread because i am a LP working with 2 dcs in 2 different childcare locations; i am generally run-ragged and thought the answer to all my woes may lie here....

how are you alls still so run ragged if you have cleaners and nannies??!

it makes me realise that the struggling is all in vain! Doesnt matter how organised you get, because even if you have someone doing the work for you it is still a struggle!!

i do get everything ready the night before-packed lunches, clothes, bags, shoes, drink, bikes with tyres pumped, helmets, waterproofs...all lined up at the door

shopping delivery once a week

dont iron, or often put clothes away....or hoover...never dust Spend a lot of time out of the house so it doesn't matter...or keep light dim, so you don't notice

Don't iron

Clean 2 hours a week (adults and older children, do it together)

Play with each other

and what proudnscary said
and lots of chocolate cake helps too

proudnscary I love your way....I might just start doing that instead!

If you can afford a cleaner fair enough but I would rather spend the money on gin and nice bags.

Everything goes on the calendar plus a large desk diary so I can plan ahead.

Night before all clothes laid out get radio weather forecast.
so you can plan your own clothes- watching the tv one gets you distracted.

Fill school bags and your work bag

Do as much of the lunch box as you can- frozen sandwiches are a step too far for me.

Have a tumble dryer- speeds up the whole washing process

A load of washing every day.

Shop on line or try to do a mon thly shop for dry goods cleaning goods pet food need good storage for this .

Send DH to supermarket with DCs saturday am giving you time to whizz round house work.

Yea to wine

After DS's bath each weeknight I do a trawl of the laundry baskets and put on a load if needed. It goes on airers before bed and is dry by the time we get in the next day. Stops laundry building up and up and no need to tumble dry.

Ds has lunch at nursery so DH and I take microwave meals, leftovers or cartons of soup to work. No 'packed lunches', they're too time-consuming to make.

Eat out every Friday, easy meals in the week.

Admit what you will and won't do. I always nod sagely at "batch cook and freeze" but I know that actually I will never do this. I don't mind making a big Sunday dinner so it does Monday's tea as well, though.

ithinkimightbegoingmad so basically you are doing all this and still feel like there should be a better way?

yes smeg definitely...i feel like i'm doing it wrong Its so relentless. Repetitive routines to this extent really repel me. I like spontaneity...so its taken me aloooong time to get organised; and it does make life less stressful. Sometimes though, the repetitiveness and organisation gets all to much and I dont get organised the night before and opt for the morning stress instead

Maybe it is less of a bind/bore if you enjoy routines....

and smeg i hae always thought that a cleaner is the answer...this thread says otherwise i think

ithink I might be a wee bit into routines, but they free up some space for spontaneity, imo - if I know I've got all the cleaning/laundry/whatever done, I'm free to take DS to the zoo, or to look at the trains, or off to marvel at a local construction site (thrills to a 2 year old!) - my working week is all about making sure the weekend isn't endless chores and rushing to keep up.

Also, I suspect it is different for different ages. Right now I'm pg with a 2 year old. Perhaps when I've got a 6 and 8 year old I'll be all "riiight, everyone tidy up then we can go out for pizza! woo!" on a school night, but at the moment the children aren't helping and DH and I are knackered...

I think it would be a lot, lot worse without a cleaner. I think she probably gives us about 5 hours of free time each weekend by coming every other wednesday - and I bloody LOVE her! :)

YY blackcurrants i completely agree...it does free up time for spontaneity...that is what me so long to come to terms with (dumbass emoticon)

but sometimes the amount of time it frees up isn't worth the time spent getting organised (i don't think i can convey quite how much i hate routine!)

Also, I don't want to get out the tiny violin, but when you are a LP you know you have to do it all, ALL THE TIME...so i think sometimes it maybe feels more insurmountable than if you have a DP picking up some of the chores? maybe not...i dont have the washing and clearing up which comes with that extra person in the house...maybe it evens out...

[is slightly in love with blackcurrants] bit concerned you're pregnant with a 2 year old though. That is seriously asking for inducement.

ithink - ooh you're right there. I often think the hardest part of being a LP must be feeling that it's always, always, always down to you. Stupid things like, if DS is ill I love having DH there so I can say: more calpol? Should we call the doctor? It's not that I can't make that decision on my own - I can and I have - it's that I'm not on my own when I make it. It must be bloody hard, I can't fully express my admiration for all LPs!

I like routines, and they work for me. They get rid of that panic: wait, did I miss a doctor's appointment? Wait, are we out of nappies? Wait... what just happened? I like feeling in control. Obv. if you feel they're stifling then it won't work for you!

Routines also get rid of having to make it up on the spot when knackered. If I've planned for spag bol, bought the ingredients for spag bol, and (even better) made spag bol in advance and have it in the freezer, we don't all roll in starving at 6pm with a stropping toddler who's demanding biscuits and then open the fridge and think "I have to decide what we're having for dinner and I don't have a brain cell left." - That sense of not having enough impetus at the end of the day was what drove me to meal planning. One of the nice things about meal planning too is it gives me just enough 'safe spontenaeity' - like, I'll get home and think: no, don't fancy spag bol but did also make thai sweet chilli chicken - really fancy that, so let's have thursday night's dinner tonight.... and I can, because I've planned enough to have it all in the house.

theonly and Gosh, DS was 9lb and 21 inches - 27 months ago... so the idea of a 2 year old ... oowwwwwch

ooooooouuuuuuch

ok if I laugh any more I may just wee. and it'll be YOUR fault!