Your tips please to a happy household when working ft...

[YouSmegHead]

So recently went back to work ft and haven't found my stride yet. What top tips do you have for keeping me sane

Somermummy1 ditto my mornings

FamiliesShareGerms how do you get your work outlook calendars to talk to each other? can you link them so you can see each others?

Can someone help me do labels from Outlook for my Xmas cards, btw? Every year I try, and every year it goes horribly wrong ....!

Chicmama - just add the other person as an attendee to any events you create and then it will send them an appointment.

Boffinmum - in my Outlook, go into contacts, Actions, Mail merge, and select labels. I haven't tried it though !

I've asked all my senior colleagues about how they survived the small children years and simultaneously got promoted at work. The answer was always cleaner and a housekeeper / au pair and a flexible spouse who does his share.

I'm spending a significant sum each month on outsourcing the housework. Worth every penny.

boffinmum where did you get your moleskine A6 concertina folder from??

I am working from an oldish version of Outlook, so that doesn't work. I managed to persuade it to do some sort of merge in the past but ended up with random labels everywhere. Or the same label everywhere.

I need a PA, I really do.

Sainsbury Centre for the Visual Arts gift shop!

Moleskin folder

It is a fine art, and sometimes goes wrong but this is my approach:

1. DH gets home from work earlier than me, so I drop off to the CM, he picks up.
2. DC baths are alternated between us, so neither one is doing the bathing every night, ditto with cooking dinner.
3. Meal plan for the week and get a slow cooker, it is a god send.
4. Clothes are laid out the night before, my bag irs organised night before and DH's lunchf or work is made too.
5. Party invites/event letters etc are on the front of the fridge so we can see whats on that week.
6. I allocate 3 hours on a Sunday to blitx the house, so during the week it's 'upkeep' like laundry, run the hoover round etc, Bedsheets always changed on a sunday.
7. My hair is always washed the night before, it takes up too much time in the mornings.
8. DISHWASHER! - 'nuff said.

I'm self employed here and its a busy busy farm with other business so long hours and stress.

I agree with whats already said but my tumble dryer was a godsend. You iron very little, the clothes are softer and you can sort out the pants, socks into seperate piles.

As for a cleaner, again, agree if you can find someone who is reliable and cleans properly then its a help but my place is dusty and grubby after 2 days of a cleaner coming over so realistically I would need her twice a week but cant justify or afford that.

Dont bath the kids everynight, just isnt necessary when young, it seems a waste of hot water and time. Once a week plus a shower at the swimming pool after lessons. My kids dont smell or look grubby - use a flannel instead.

Big freezer, buy meat in bulk ie meat box, chickens etc. Buy bread in large amounts and freeze. Batch cook as much as possible.

Wall calender in kitchen, magnets notes on fridge.

Think plenty of mums are lucky if they have the luxury of weekends together with the OH. If so then it should be easy to find hours to catch up while OH takes the kids out. Use grandparents more (I do find mine are very selfish with helping out).

Training the kids is great but that depends on their age mine arnt old enough yet.

Isn't it all just so grim?

Think places like the 'Card Warehouse' sell great greetings cards for the money 29p - 99p. I tend to buy a bundle - I buy a mix of childrens, adults and ages cards. You can also have the odd congrats/sympathy cards and at the price they sell them its perfect. Also a few rolls of male/female wrapping paper usually mega cheap. I have a bag of gifts in the wardrobe that I collect of the year like lego books, torches, modelling clay etc which are great for the kids parties.

No time to be grim - grim would be no job and no money. At least working f/t and very little money = no time and therefore no time to think about how bloody tiring it all is...

Second the use of the tumbledrier. I live somewhere where washing freezes on the line 4 months of the year and rots on the line 2 months of the year (welcome to sunny new jersey!) and our flat is too small for enough clothes horses. I use them sometimes and for some things, but in general, remove wash from machine, chuck in drier, remove from drier (straight to hangers if work shirts) - sort, fold, done. it makes it a one-night task rather than lingering, which helps me feel like it's DONE. Bad for environment, good for my sanity. Much like my eventual caving to disposable nappies, alas! Not enough hours in the day.

Every one should have a cleaner. We don't go out, don't spend much on ourselves, but the cleaner is a luxury that is thoroughly justified.

My cleaner has a cleaner (well, she says her mum does it).

Cleaners are brilliant.

So many great tips on this thread -how do I go about finding a cleaner? Am going to tumble more, we generate our own leccy so it's free anyway. Will def set up online shop. Decluttering at the weekend can't bloody wait!

We only bath DD on alternate nights and one of us gets in with her. We also alternate bedtime feed whilst other tidies, loads dishwasher etc.

A minor thing that helps me is a large mirror in lounge with good lighting - I can do my work make-up in it whilst keeping an eye on DD.

Get an awesome OH

This does all sound terribly middle class.

DP and I work FT, have 2 DCs and we manage fine! Yes we make sure we plan and prepare but I'm really surprised by the amount of effort it seems to take to just live your life!

I wonder what % time is spent planning and whether all this planning / updating calendars / syncing phones etc etc actually produces a return on time invested.

Sounds like planning for the sake of planning

And if all the work is outsourced - how can you still be so busy???

Mandy 21 ( if you are still here) No - ironing. I can't get it down to no ironing at all but childrens stuff is ok if you fold it straight out of the tumble drier and the load is not too big to start with. I wear smart clothes but never a blouse - jersey tops with suits can be tumbledried. Lots of my dresses and workwear can be washed, but not officialy tumble dried, so i line dry them until nearly dry and finish off for 10 minutes on a low heat to take any creases out.

Smart office shirts are the only thing that gets ironed in my house and DH does those himself.

I don't think it's middle class to be organised although I agree that many people simply will never earn enough to hire a cleaner. Some people lead very disorganised lives or they and their partner just prefer things like that lurch from disaster to disaster and live in a messy house - some love it, that's how they are made and that's fine. The ideal is to find a balance you can live with depending on your personality.

We have one paper calendarin the kitchen which people glance at each morning to see what is on - music lesson, games kit, after school club or whatever. That at the moment is quicker than everyone having things into electronic diaries and works for us. Just find what works for you. I certainly think it helps children to have somwhere they can loom at to see what is going on when. We also put out school notes which say things like tomorrow is a trip and you need to bring a packed lunch and everyone tries to remind everyohne else so that things aren't forgotten.

No it's not all horrible nad over busy now chidlre are over. The organisation means you get as children age much much more leisure time. Now my youngest are 13 it's all a complete picnic compared to having under 5s.

Some people male and female will bke in a state and a flap if they have one dental appointment on that day and no work and nothing else. Other people will be running BP and a family the size of mine with thousands of things on and be fine. I think the calmness comes from your own personality, getting enough sleep and good food and positive thoughts. It does not necessarily flow from the kind of life you are leading.

Here's my wishlist:

• cleaner
• gardener
• handyman
• on-tap babysitting
• secretary
• car mechanic
• large private income

And the reality ...

• single mother
• a slightly disabled and messy 10 year old who clearly still believes in the washing/dishes/pick clothes off the floor/money/homework fairy
• full time work
• commute daily right across to the other side of london
• no cleaner, gardener, handyman, babysitter (but childminder for pick-up)
• massive overdraft

But never mind, I'll grin and bear it!

Getting a cleaner is absolutely vital, absolutely, but doing a weekly food plan and an on-line shop has revolutionised our lives. I also do most of our clothes shopping on-line at the beginning of each season.

Also, making sure the house is tidy every night makes me feel organised but doesn't take a long time (since we do it every day, and don't wait until there are heaps of stuff around, which would make me stressed anyway).

I also try to work from home one day a week and get extra stuff done then. If I am really stretched I bring paperwork to work with me and do it in the lunch hour.

And agree with a short commute - my commute is 30 mins door to door, we could live somewhere lovely in the countryside but have decided its better to be home quickly so we have more time with the DCs.

DH has to do his own ironing, I do my own and the children's (limited). As a rule I try to avoid buying stuff that needs to be ironed.

Must adopt the sandwhich-freezing approach!