Is there anyone who'd like to share the trials and tribulations of working full-time?

[Ladylay]

I love perusing MN in my lunch-hour . But there dont seem to be any threads for those of us who are in full-time work whilst bringing up a family.

Whilst I share a load of the same concerns as SAHM's and part-time workers, I also have different stuff to deal with, like just trying to get everyone out the bloody house in the morning on time!! ahem. And wondered if anyone fancied comparing notes, advice etc?

Almost the weekend - yipee!

I'm finding out that getting organised the night before is the way forward. I've lost count of the number of mornings I've been late because I've had so much to do in the mornings. Life is much easier if we prepare dd's bottles for the morning and make sure her bag is packed for cm. We are getting our bathroom done at the moment and haven't had a working shower for about a week so I've had to have a bath and wash my hair using a jug in the mornings. Thankfully, the bathroom should be back in working order by Monday.

A supportive other half is essential too. I have to say mine could do better - especially in the mornings as he will lie in bed until he absolutly has to get up (usually when I leave for work). I don't make too much of a deal about it though as I enjoy seeing to dd in the mornings as I don't see her for such a huge part of the day - it just means I very rarely get into work early.

DP similar makemineawine (love the name btw). Hes SO grumpy in the morning but I enjoy my cuddles with DD then and then when I get grumpy in the evening, hes the one to be entertainer!

Thanks Ladylay! I know. I have to stop myself moaning about him as he does do his share (just not in the mornings!)

Out of interest how do you keep involved with your dc's school/parents of dc's friends? My dc is not yet at school - but I am already worried he might be left on the sidelines because I am not there to arrange "playdates" (hate that word!) Any experiences/thoughts on this would be welcomed

work so dont do after school meets.do regularly invite pals form nursery and school over at weekend - but with folk i know dc go home with their dc for wee do's and i collect from work

spontaneous pop by's dont happen but planned regular meets do.and plenty other mums work too so no biggie

I think I am going to need this thread. Just returned to work, new job, full time - 5 days a week and will be out of the house 7am to 7.30pm initially. This has to be done at the moment. I feel lucky to have got a job. I've had 14 months off by the way.

I've just started a thread in this section and I hope I won't get flamed.

Any tips for when you have poorly DCs? My DD has has constant ear infections etc this winter and we are having the 'nursery or no nursery' debate about tomorrow. I feel as if I put upon my parents all of the time. The guilt !

It is hard when your DC is poorly. I am lucky to have a very understanding manager (she has 2 DCs, so knows what it is like). When DD is sick, I have managed to do a mixture of taking annual leave, flexi time and working at home. I can make up my hours by working in the evening after DD has gone to bed. As DD gets older I find she can amuse herself for longer periods (i.e. I put her in front of the tv) so I can get some work done at home during the day.

Heavily reliant on very king Grandparents here who drop all and drive 50 miles to come and stay to look after her. Luckily been do-able so far as she not often very ill (fx). Also feel v guilty and buy them chocs every so often

'kind'

Having the sick child/nursery debate today with husband. I'm working at home as dd2 has tonsilitis, but she is massively better with antibiotics and could possibly go in tomorrow. DH is trying to work from home tomorrow, has already exhausted his parental leave days this year. But to be honest it's a nightmare. I'm very lucky I have a boss with kids of his own, but it's hard. Would love grandparents to help, but that's never going to happen. Asked my mother if she could possibly do a day or two at Easter for my eldest (she's seven and so good and easy to look after on her own) and got told no, she couldn't leave the cat and she'd be researching kitchens as she wants her updated. Doesn't matter, her loss. Would be nice if she could help though.

I once took a half day because DD was off solids only to get a horrible email from my boss. Wouldn't mind but I'm in a area where there are no set hours, you're (except with my guy) trusted to just get the work done and I wasn't on a machine that day.

Would love to live in the same country as GPs, but even if we did they're all quite young and working ft. Still it would be nice to have the odd day off here and there just to sleep.

Same thing here, my parents don't live in this country and MIL is too elderly to look after DS for a full day. My mum has volunteer to look after him when he'll get chicken pox (or similar). My boss is quite understanding but expect the job to be done so I do so stuff at home and then present them at work.
Today DS wasn't at nursery to to fever so DH who was day off looked after him. This saved me having to take yet another annual leave.

I am very lucky. My boss has never asked me to take leave to cover sickness. He just trusts me to catch up when I can. I can't imagine how tough it would be if I had a job where I couldn't work at home.

No grandparent support locally, my parents are an hour away but not interested, DH's are 3+ hours away, so can do holidays, but not sickness. And they're not that well, so I don't like to ask re holidays if I can avoid it.

Well I have survived an ear infection day with DD thanks to grandparents help. Fingers crossed she is well tomorrow. All hell was breaking loose at work today so I didn't dare ask for any time!

Can I just add to this that in some cases I've seen, people who work 4 days have it harder! A close friend of mine works 4 days and so all of the household stuff and the care of her DD when she finishes school falls on her. She also is expected by others at work, to complete the tasks that the est of us do during work time on this day. So, doctors/ tax renewal/ dentist/ dry cleaning/ smear/ popping to town etc. Everyone in the company does as they please but because she's 'only' part time, she is expected to do everything on her 'day off'

she def has it harder than me, working full time. They've offered me 4 days a week on many occassion... no thanks!

Hi all

Really glad to have found this thread. I have just been to see potential nursery for our DS when I go back to work FT in August when he will be 9 months.
I have a 50 mile commute and will have some overseas trips. I should be able to work from home 1-2 days a week and DH is self employed so will have some flexibility.

But I' still feeling pretty scared at the thought - this thread is making me see that it will be more than possible (as long as I get my organised self back into action - she has had a long holiday)

Looks like harder times are to come in 4.5 years when school comes a long. I will have won the lottery by then though

I realised the 4 day thing when I built up my hours after mat leave. Would much rather have an excuse for a cleaner and an online shop!

HI I have been working full time for the last two years. My boys are 3 and 4.5 hours I did not choose to be full time it happened because I was made redundant as my former employers swiped all part timers from their work force.(:-

I find I'm constantly looking to the future mom101 to remind myself of the quality of life we are working for.

My parents did it, DP's parents did it in the early years too. Its resulted in our aspirations growing with each generation which can only be a good thing?

Can I join? I was starting to feel the only ft wohm left- so many people seem to go back part time!
Just have the one DS ( and can't remember actually being in bed with DP awake so DC2 not on agenda)

Days when DS is in nursery-
up at 5.45 BF etc
6.30 both leave
arrive work/nursery around 740- start work 8am
leave work 5-30-6
back home 7 ish
DS eats around 7.30- bed at 9.

days when he isn't at nursery work starts later but ends later.
I work from home one day a week which is bliss.

DS has a late bedtime so that I can see him even if i work late- this is great in some ways but is leaving me with no me time or couple time

It's lovely to hear from so many FT working Mums. I have two DD's: just turned 4, and 14 months. My routine is:

6.30: get up and dressed.
7.00: girls up, breakfast, dressed.
7.30: DH takes youngest to childminder, I take oldest to nursery Tues/Thurs/Fri. The other days she goes to CM.
7.45: I leave the house and into work for 8am.
Mon/Wed: DH collects both girls at 5.20. They have their tea at the CM.
Tues: DH collects youngest from CM, I collect DD1 from nursery at 5pm and give her tea.
Thurs: I collect both girls, and home by 3.30. DH works late if he needs to.
Fri: DH finishes at 1pm and collects both girls. I get home around 4pm.

6.15: bathtime
6.45: DD2 in bed
7.00: DD1 in bed.

DH and I eat afterwards on a Mon/Wed. I work for an hour or two on a Tuesday and Thursday night.
We don't have a cleaner at the moment, but we will do once our finances have recovered from my maternity leave.
We have a date night every other Saturday night.
DH gets to sleep in on a Saturday morning, and I get Sunday morning.
We each get at least an hour each weekend to be on our own and relax. I usually take the girls out to the local cafe, and leave DH to mooch around the house for an hour or two. He usually takes them off to soft play or swimming.
I generally go to the gym on the way home on a Mon/Wed/Fri.
Every now and then DH and I both take a day off, and send the girls off to the CM/nursery. We laze around the house, sleep , go to the pub for a long lunch. It's bliss.
Both sets of parents live 300 miles away, but my parents come up every couple of months. We always try to fit in as many nights to the pub/cinema/theatre/restaurant as we can.

Each Sunday night I get 5 sets of clothes together for each girl, right down to socks, vests etc. The rule is that DD1 can choose whatever 'set' of clothes she wants, but can not mix and match. That cuts down time spent in the morning.
We have the 'breakfast fairy', who comes to our house each night. We put cereal out in tupperware boxes with lids before we go to bed. DD1 knows she can't upset the fairy by not eating what she's left. This really cuts down on the whole 'I want to get my own bowl, I don't want that' debate in the morning.
I work from home at least once a week, more often it's 2-3 days a week.
I have a selection of cards and books to use as birthday presents.
I pre-order everyone's birthday/anniversary/other cards on moonpig.com. That way I don't have to remember birthdays and the like.
For each season, I buy all the clothes for the girls online, in one go. I generally do a huge order to Next when the catalogue comes out, and put them away.

Phew! That was a long message. Sorry, it just came tumbling out. Right, I need to get back to work.

I'm starting back at work tomorrow and I'm finding these "get ready" timetables really helpful. We did a test run this morning, but were out of the door 15 minutes later than I'll need to be, so I may have to readjust my alarm!

I've hired a cleaner so that'll help and DCs will be going to nursery/preschool 2 days a week and we're having a nanny for the other three days.

This has all happened rather quickly so I haven't had too much time to get stressed about it, but I'm being inspired by all of you who are making it work.

work ft and nursery/school children is achievable,just need good planning and organisation

and despite the oft touted guilty frazzled parent praded by media and social commentators, that isn't necessarily the case.

i wouldn't have it any other way,continue working was always the plan

and imo it is worth it

main thing is planning and get all stuff ready for the week.ironed, laid out

and batch cook and freeze

and treats and long lies at weekend

I'm really not organised. Being a working mother has still not changed my procrastinating ways