Thoughts on a video that claims that women’s spaces should validate trans women?

[aquapod]

On YouTube the other day I was served a video by a trans identified male (Transgender Positivity) who was speaking about his experience of using women's spaces and how he feels about the rise of unisex bathrooms in the UK.

I assume I was shown this video because I sometimes have watched gender critical content. Anyway in this video he talks about how he is disappointed and unhappy with unisex bathrooms because he felt very validated being allowed to use women's single sex spaces and it helped him get over his feelings of "imposter syndrome".

He also said that unisex bathrooms reduce the chance of meaningful interaction and humbling experiences in public spaces and between different kinds of people meaning that even if women object to men in their single sex spaces its basically good for them to have to tolerate men like him in them.

His title literally says "female spaces are my spaces" and the whole gist of his argument is that he no longer feels validated using a unisex bathroom even if it is perfectly safe for him to do so. It also seems he misses the chance to humble and educate women by imposing himself on them in their single sex spaces.

He seems to live in Poland most of the time but is British by birth. He doesn't seem to give a damn about how actual women might feel or what they might want, it's all about him and his desires as per usual.

Well he can just fuck off then. I cba to watch any of his nonsense.

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Anyway in this video he talks about how he is disappointed and unhappy with unisex bathrooms because he felt very validated being allowed to use women's single sex spaces and it helped him get over his feelings of "imposter syndrome".

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Welcome to Mumsnet OP.

Must we listen to yet another tedious man trying to erode women's rights and the safeguarding of girls and women?

It's funny how everyone hates unisex bathrooms though!

Women- don't want to share with men, having men pee on the seats, risk of assault

Men- have longer queues and no urinals means it takes longer. Not to mention risk of being accused of SA

Trans- no validation - hahahah!

The reason he has "imposter syndrome" is probably because he is an imposter. He'll just have to learn to live with that, or else stop pretending to be something he isn't – and which he clearly knows he isn't.

He did talk about how he had been ogled in public which made him uncomfortable but he then goes on to say that being able to witness other people in their most vulnerable state is a good thing, assuming it means he is able to witness women in when they are a vulnerable state and probably have no choice but to put up with him in their space!

@Boiledbeetle & @AskingQuestionsAllTheTime Absolutely he is an imposter and doesn't look remotely like a woman, not that that even matters he isn't and never will be. I think that's the issue though, he knows he isn't a woman, he enjoys not having to feel bad or awkward at accessing women's single sex spaces when women have no choice but to accept him. He's using women and validation is obviously a fancy word for something else.

At least he's honest. It's not about having somewhere safe to go to the toilet, it's about invading female only space and making women uncomfortable. They tell on themselves all the time.

"He did talk about how he had been ogled in public"

Aye, right....

@Whatchamacallitt It's true they do! It seems clear he doesn't see any issue with what he says again because what real women actually want doesn't concern him. in his view if his presence upsets you, if you have trauma or are vulnerable then it's good for you to have to deal with a man in your space and he's allowing you to be humbled. I shouldn't have watched it as it's making my blood boil!

To be fair to him, I am sure people do stare at him especially when wearing what he calls "form fitting" outfits 🤮However I'm not sure "ogled" is quite the right word for it!

a) He is an imposter in womanface.
b) Women are not service humans. We are not his mummy.

There, there, diddums. Just piss off back to the men’s loos where you belong.

Women are not put on this earth to validate men.

For "ogled" read "looked at with deep suspicion and mistrust", I suspect.

What she said ^^

Exactly.

Ogle is the wrong word. What he is experiencing is called "worried glances"

I can be so la-la sometimes. On first reading when he mentions being "humbled by diversity" I thought he meant he learned to appreciate women more. 😝. But, duh, judging by other comments (can't stand to watch the video of course) that's not what he meant at all.

I do keep wondering why it never strikes these Real Women (tm) that they don't react the way women tend to.

Exactly. And that is what the TRA campaign has become. Not about some, however few they might be, wanting to live a life different to one that society's gender conformity demands.

The TRA movement has become a men's rights movement.

It is all about how women should STFU and go out of their way to be subservient and validate men's delusions.

I think categorising the men who do this as all being AGP isn't in fact helpful.

No doubting some are, but I think there are some men who see it as part of asserting that their rights as men are more important then women.

And this is a new more recent means of doing it.

And love the idea that so many parts of society allow them even encourage them to demean women in public and in print.

They dont need some niche ism or whatever.

Just being an MRA, the view of the world that allows TRAs to thrive, is enough. Wanting to humiliate women and being applauded for doing it.

You are right, @IwantToRetire - I wrote my post too quickly. It doesn’t matter why they want to identify as women, women’s single sex spaces are not their therapy zones.

Imposter syndrome.... no, that would be the voice of his actual conscience.

If women can 'get over' having to deal with him in their spaces - that's his conscience talking to him again - he can get over being in men's spaces. Unisex is the only possible compromise.

But his issues illustrate why laws protecting women from men are more necessary than ever.

Funny how we never seem to hear this from trans men.

I did see a social media post from one who said they’d gone somewhere without any unisex toilets, needed the loo, and were struggling to work out which toilet they were supposed to use under the new guidelines.

In the end, they discreetly used the women’s toilet and, somehow, didn’t have an identity crisis or disappear in a puff of smoke. They were simply describing a practical difficulty.

Tough for him.