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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

The Bluestocking: home of the ice-cold Mojito foot-bath

902 replies

MarieDeGournay · 29/06/2026 18:06

Welcome all to the Bluestocking Women's Pub, where food and drink are free as in gluten free, calorie free, alcohol free - but still delicious. And free free too, of course.
Served by highly professional staff who are gerbils.

The Bluestocking Ice-Cold Mojito Foot-bath kept us deliciously cool through the heatwave. Come and join us, in case there's another one🌞

The Bluestocking: home of the ice-cold Mojito foot-bath
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EdithStourton · 04/07/2026 12:52

Crikey, Myrtle, you made the right call there.

I'm the one who reads DH's contracts. For such a precise thinker, he is terrible at stuff like that.

And to everyone else who has issues with dickhead cyclists, I really truly feel your pain. Also, it is reassuring to know that I'm not alone. It would give me great joy to be on board a tractor and oblige a batch of the rude buggers to have to squeeeeeze past, so well done those farmers.

EdithStourton · 04/07/2026 12:59

Oh, and I'm another one who enjoyed RSL as a child.

There we were, in Forrin Climes, and there was the child Edith, being indoctrinated with Beatrix Potter, RSL and AA Milne.

I want to try and catch up on the madder than mad ET today, but other things - the garden, the laundry - beckon insistently.

Waitwhat23 · 04/07/2026 13:06

Currently on holiday, beside water, and there is a swan with cygnets (funny little gray fluffy gorgeousnesses) as well as numerous geese with goslings which we have been watching delightedly. We've got a puffin/seal watching expedition planned too.

ErrolTheDragon · 04/07/2026 13:21

Users of road and shared paths around here are mostly ok but there’s always a few bad ‘uns, both cyclists and motorists, and also farm vehicles with their wide scary contraptions barrelling around corners fast - maybe they can see over the hedges and know all the spots a car can be swerved into as they suddenly appear but I’m not convinced. So we drive cautiously in our lanes, periodically pulling in to let the worst of the lot - tailgaters - zoom by.

Chickadeeinme · 04/07/2026 13:56

July 4th today but it’s so damn hot we may not bother to go out and sit in Payson Park to watch across Back Cove the fireworks going off over the Eastern Prom. No chance at all of fighting up through the swarms of people actually on the Eastern Prom. I actually got up early this morning and went for a walk around the neighbourhood because I thought the mall (always a good cool place for a walk on a hot day - once round is about a mile) might be closed for the holiday. Nope. According to my friend who went there this morning for her walk it’s all open. The great endeavour of capitalism grinds on regardless of the poor bloody retail workers who would rather like to celebrate with their families. I hope they’re getting extra pay but I’m not confident.

PastaAllaNorma · 04/07/2026 14:09

All three of the Pastalings were home last night so we played games until midnight - two new ones called Skull and You Know It. It was brilliant. I love how much they enjoy each other's company now they are all adults.

All three here again on Sunday, then that's it for another month as eldest goes to help MIL for a week by which time youngest will be back to Uni accommodation for friends' birthdays for 10 days, then middle one goes on holiday with his best mate.

The roads are all closed here because of a music festival so I'm just reading in the garden and talking with the tame magpie who visits.

She went in the kitchen today, the cheeky wench.

Chickadeeinme · 04/07/2026 14:12

@MyrtleLion I read an article in today’s NYT and thought of you - I’m on my iPad so can’t DM so I’m posting it here:
“My job search has left me questioning every single decision I’ve made”

By Jessica Grose
I spent the past few weeks talking to people across the country who are looking for work in our low-hire, low-fire labor market, where hiring rates are nearly as low for steady jobs as they were in the aftermath of the Great Recession, despite an otherwise fairly decent overall economy. While the hiring market has perked up a bit in recent months, the latest jobs report suggests that wage growth has been outpaced by inflation in the past year. The number of unemployed people who have been out of work for over six months is the highest it’s been since the pandemic. This job market is not just bad for young people, it’s bad for everyone looking.

None of the men and women I spoke to are sitting idly by, twiddling their thumbs. They are doing every possible thing they can to spiff themselves up for a new role: taking classes to get a new certification and going back to school for a year to get a master’s degree. They are attending every in-person networking event under the sun. They are all over various job sites, applying for appropriate roles every week, if not every day, even though they worry that some of those job listings might be scams.

They’re extremely aware that an approximate 90 percent of companies use artificial intelligence at some point in the hiring process, so they’re also trying to contort their résumés to appeal to the bots, even though how those tools determine their suitability is a “black box.”

As I was speaking to job seekers, the image that kept popping into my head is the waiting room in the 1988 movie “Beetlejuice.” If you haven’t seen the film, this scene features a newly dead couple, Adam and Barbara Maitland, who are just realizing that they are, in fact, not alive. While trying to figure out their new reality, they end up in a kind of bureaucratic, fun-house mirror underworld, surrounded by people with shrunken heads and green skin, where they are waiting for their case worker.

The Maitlands find a book in their house, “Handbook for the Recently Deceased,” but it’s written in such thick jargon they don’t understand a word of it. In the underworld, when they ask questions, people roll their eyes and say they should have studied the manual harder, telling them things like, “It’s all in the handbook!” and “The intermediate interface chapter on haunting says it all.”

Looking for a job in 2026 is a version of this purgatory.

Nena Caviness, 46, who works in manufacturing and retail, has been looking for a job for six months. She uses artificial intelligence to sharpen her résumé and find the best fitting roles, and says she has sent in over 200 applications. She has made it to the interview stage a few times, and each time it involves an arduous set of take-home assignments and in-person interviews. “I can run a flawless process, prepare for 40 hours, perform well across multiple panels, reach the final round three separate times and still end with nothing. ” Caviness said.

Caviness’s experience is not unique, and the description that kept coming up among both the job seekers and economists I spoke to was: strange. Having the economy in a low-fire, low-hire equilibrium “is actually pretty unusual,” said Erika McEntarfer, a research scholar and a distinguished policy fellow at Stanford’s Institute for Economic Policy Research, who affirmed my waiting room analogy. “I can’t recall a recent precedent.”

This strange and unusual job market is the result of a confluence of technological and political forces: A.I. kneecapping entry-level jobs, continuing tariff chaosand uncertainty around trade policy, federal funding cuts and the Iran War pushing up oil prices at the beginning of the year. (McEntarfer herself has been a victim of our chaotic and vindictive administration.) We don’t even know how to measure the full impact of artificial intelligence on the labor market yet, as my newsroom colleague Ben Casselman explained earlier this week, “Researchers can’t even agree on basic questions like how many companies are using A.I. or which workers are most vulnerable to the disruptions it could cause.”

The unknown unknowns about A.I. may be making employers gun-shy about creating new roles, or hiring to replace the wave of boomers who are retiring, said Cristian deRitis, a managing director and deputy chief economist at Moody’s Analytics. Artificial intelligence makes posting roles very easy for employers, which can lend the impression a business is thriving, he explained: “It’s costless to post openings everywhere and just kind of see what happens. If there’s a great candidate that all of a sudden shows up in your doorstep, maybe you advance it.” But maybe they don’t.

This uncomfortable ambiguity is affecting how we all feel about the economy, and how we counsel young people to live their lives. There is so much anxiety about whether the sensible financial choices of the past — going to college, buying a home — are still the most rational choices in an economy that may no longer reward those choices. As one 40-something with two graduate degrees who has been looking for work for over a year put it to me, “My job search has left me questioning every single decision I’ve made as an adult.”

Over the next few weeks, I am going to write about navigating the purgatory job market. I plan to cover the long tail of federal job and budget cuts and their impact on workers and what the day-to-day grind of searching feels like. I will try to pull back the curtain on how artificial intelligence is impacting the job hunt — for both employers and employees — and how it’s making everyone involved feel like they’re getting catfished.

While no one can really predict when or if this strange equilibrium might shift, I will also explore policy ideas that could make the experience much less Kafkaesque. It’s a tremendous waste to have motivated and experienced job seekers languishing, demoralized for years, and I do believe that we can make the search a little less ugly than it is right now.

Thehorticulturalhussie · 04/07/2026 14:33

EdithStourton · 04/07/2026 12:52

Crikey, Myrtle, you made the right call there.

I'm the one who reads DH's contracts. For such a precise thinker, he is terrible at stuff like that.

And to everyone else who has issues with dickhead cyclists, I really truly feel your pain. Also, it is reassuring to know that I'm not alone. It would give me great joy to be on board a tractor and oblige a batch of the rude buggers to have to squeeeeeze past, so well done those farmers.

We're at Peak Tractor right now due to barley harvesting and generally their driving is calm and considerate, they always slow down for dog walkers and horses and generally will stop at a passing place to let others through. However the holiday season has started at weekends at least and so we add to the mix those drivers with caravans who do not understand the etiquette of driving on very narrow lanes. We have a lovely lady tractor driver who expects, not unreasonably, that when she has right of way, the opposing traffic, of which there is little, lets her through. Recently I was walking along the lane and saw her bumper to bumper with a range rover pulling a caravan, who should have backed down to the nearest passing place but was apparently incapable of reversing. I watched as she reached down into the foot well, pulled out an emery board and calmly started to file her nails. So I applauded and walked on. Admirable woman.

PS From the top of Peak Tractor you can see the top of Peak Woo on a clear day.

Magpiecomplex · 04/07/2026 15:07

Thehorticulturalhussie · 04/07/2026 14:33

We're at Peak Tractor right now due to barley harvesting and generally their driving is calm and considerate, they always slow down for dog walkers and horses and generally will stop at a passing place to let others through. However the holiday season has started at weekends at least and so we add to the mix those drivers with caravans who do not understand the etiquette of driving on very narrow lanes. We have a lovely lady tractor driver who expects, not unreasonably, that when she has right of way, the opposing traffic, of which there is little, lets her through. Recently I was walking along the lane and saw her bumper to bumper with a range rover pulling a caravan, who should have backed down to the nearest passing place but was apparently incapable of reversing. I watched as she reached down into the foot well, pulled out an emery board and calmly started to file her nails. So I applauded and walked on. Admirable woman.

PS From the top of Peak Tractor you can see the top of Peak Woo on a clear day.

Gosh, expecting to be able to use her right of way?! Good for her!

I'm now feeling the need for an expedition to Peak Tractor. Anyone want to join me?

ErrolTheDragon · 04/07/2026 15:13

A cousin who used to drive tractors in his student vacations mentioned the occasional sandwich break caused by car drivers (not even towing afaik) expecting him to reverse.

EdithStourton · 04/07/2026 15:20

Splendid, Hussie!

We too get holidaymakers. Also, teachers driving minibuses for school trips. They very often don't seem aware that lanes vary randomly in width, so they'll carry on barrelling through a wide bit, thus ensuring that they meet you when you're still just in a narrow bit - when all they had to do was take their foot off the accelerator and slow down a smidgeon so you'd pass where there was plenty of space.

I've watched some mind-blow reversing in my time, both mind-blowingly bad (zig-zagging backwards down a lane to finally stop 3' out from the verge in a very wide area so that a van towing a a heavy load could get past) and mind-blowingly good (using a John Deere to get a huge trailer off the road and into a farm yard, and making it look piss-easy).

This morning (between bouts of cyclists) I saw a loader with hay in the scoop, so backed up 10 yards into a gateway, exchanged happy waves with the loader driver, and then had the pleasure of seeing that there was a woman driving a mule* behind him, with a collie lying on the seat beside her and more hay in the back. The collie had that anticipatory look of a dog who thinks it's about to be put to work, while being still a bit peeved at having to bloody wait until they got to the field..

*Mule as per photo, not the equine.

The Bluestocking: home of the ice-cold Mojito foot-bath
EdithStourton · 04/07/2026 15:23

Magpiecomplex · 04/07/2026 15:07

Gosh, expecting to be able to use her right of way?! Good for her!

I'm now feeling the need for an expedition to Peak Tractor. Anyone want to join me?

Yep.
Can we have a go on them once we get there?

Magpiecomplex · 04/07/2026 15:40

EdithStourton · 04/07/2026 15:23

Yep.
Can we have a go on them once we get there?

Of course! Make your bookings now - we have a full range of old and new.

PastaAllaNorma · 04/07/2026 15:43

@Magpiecomplex , your relative is getting a little bit presumptuous.

She came to see us on the patio, inspected the drinking water I'd put out for her, then hopped from planter to planter before going inside.

As I got up to follow her and encourage her to return to the garden, she walked purposefully into the hallway and hopped up the stairs.

I caught up with her in our bedroom, two flights up, looking out the window.she had a little panic while I opened the big velux and the window so she had routes outside, then she scarpered.

The Bluestocking: home of the ice-cold Mojito foot-bath
Magpiecomplex · 04/07/2026 15:45

PastaAllaNorma · 04/07/2026 15:43

@Magpiecomplex , your relative is getting a little bit presumptuous.

She came to see us on the patio, inspected the drinking water I'd put out for her, then hopped from planter to planter before going inside.

As I got up to follow her and encourage her to return to the garden, she walked purposefully into the hallway and hopped up the stairs.

I caught up with her in our bedroom, two flights up, looking out the window.she had a little panic while I opened the big velux and the window so she had routes outside, then she scarpered.

Poor thing, how undignified that photo is!

Send her down to Kent, I'll explain the normal role of the magpie.

PastaAllaNorma · 04/07/2026 15:48

Pooing in the radiator! I mean, that's Not On

Thehorticulturalhussie · 04/07/2026 15:53

EdithStourton · 04/07/2026 15:23

Yep.
Can we have a go on them once we get there?

This is The Blue Stocking. You can launch the tractors from the top and parachute gently to earth if you want to.
Actually, having written that it sounds like something we should definitely do!

Magpiecomplex · 04/07/2026 15:55

Thehorticulturalhussie · 04/07/2026 15:53

This is The Blue Stocking. You can launch the tractors from the top and parachute gently to earth if you want to.
Actually, having written that it sounds like something we should definitely do!

Absolutely! Although I think I'd want to get Gravity, Gyroscope and Gimbal to triple check the maths before trying a tractor parachute.

EdithStourton · 04/07/2026 15:57

Magpiecomplex · 04/07/2026 15:40

Of course! Make your bookings now - we have a full range of old and new.

<books self in for a 3 for 2 offer - an old Massey, a David Brown, and Clarkson's Lambo>

And now I need to go and dodge real-life tractors on the way to walking B&B.

Thehorticulturalhussie · 04/07/2026 15:59

The orderly queue back to the top

The Bluestocking: home of the ice-cold Mojito foot-bath
Magpiecomplex · 04/07/2026 16:01

EdithStourton · 04/07/2026 15:57

<books self in for a 3 for 2 offer - an old Massey, a David Brown, and Clarkson's Lambo>

And now I need to go and dodge real-life tractors on the way to walking B&B.

Ah, you're a woman who knows her tractors. Excellent choice, Modom.

I'm going for the combine special. I've never driven a combine, and really want to!

Magpiecomplex · 04/07/2026 16:02

Thehorticulturalhussie · 04/07/2026 15:59

The orderly queue back to the top

That's made me laugh so much!

Thehorticulturalhussie · 04/07/2026 16:05

Magpiecomplex · 04/07/2026 16:01

Ah, you're a woman who knows her tractors. Excellent choice, Modom.

I'm going for the combine special. I've never driven a combine, and really want to!

I think we're going to need a bigger parachute.

Magpiecomplex · 04/07/2026 16:08

Thehorticulturalhussie · 04/07/2026 16:05

I think we're going to need a bigger parachute.

I think you could be right. Maybe one of those triple jobs that spacecraft use?

Chersfrozenface · 04/07/2026 16:15

Magpiecomplex · 04/07/2026 16:08

I think you could be right. Maybe one of those triple jobs that spacecraft use?

US army uses two for parachuting humvees.

The Bluestocking: home of the ice-cold Mojito foot-bath