Help end medical misogyny. Sign our petition.

Help end medical misogyny.
Sign our petition.

Sign the petition

Please or to access all these features

Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

The Bluestocking Pub: Infinite Cocktails, Questionable Logistics

1000 replies

MyrtleLion · 16/05/2026 19:56

Welcome to the nth iteration of the Bluestocking women’s pub, where gerbils are staff, the drinks are free, and alcohol has no effect except to get you to the sweet spot just before the drink you really shouldn’t have had.

Men can go to the Staunch Ally next door.

It’s OK if you don’t understand. Just assume everything is normal.

Previous thread is here:

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/5523989-bluestocking-womens-pub-its-maytime

The Bluestocking Pub: Infinite Cocktails, Questionable Logistics
OP posts:
Thread gallery
158
EmpressaurusKitty · 22/05/2026 20:20

Kitty would like to suggest to the gerbil with the notebook that she could empty the Box of Distractions over the area from the window of her UFO. If that would help.

AngleofRepose · 22/05/2026 20:21

"Octavia Breakfast!"
😂

RandomHypatia · 22/05/2026 20:30

If your rescue plan involves conic sections or long division, I'm the 4th century woman for you (never sailed a boat or broken in anywhere though).

Magpiecomplex · 22/05/2026 20:33

RandomHypatia · 22/05/2026 20:30

If your rescue plan involves conic sections or long division, I'm the 4th century woman for you (never sailed a boat or broken in anywhere though).

In a similar vein, let me know if you need anything sparkly.

Swashbuckled · 22/05/2026 20:46

FuzzyPuffling · 22/05/2026 20:13

I used an online only conveyancer last time I bought/ sold. I was very nervous about the concept, but she was brilliant. Like a terrier chasing everything, responding to emails within a couple of hours at most, all progress visible online. And completion day ran really smoothly too.

I was really rather amazed...but in a good way.

I’ve used both kinds, Fuzzy.

Online can be very quick if they’re good, but impossible to get hold of when you’re doing through a frustrated patch. Last time I used a high street one (back inland) they were excellent after a slow start. I liked being able to pick up the phone and speak to someone.

My seller has an online and they sound speedy.

Swashbuckled · 22/05/2026 20:48

That’s great @MyrtleLion

I must admit, I’m rather loving the cut of my jib in this ☺️

AuntieMsDamsonCrumble · 22/05/2026 20:49

"The room fell silent. A gerbil dropped an entire forged visitor pass into a bowl of muffin batter"

This gets better and better! I'm sitting in my garden laughing quietly, with the odd snort when the hilarity gets the better of me! I'm very glad I don't have to explain to anyone, what I'm laughing at.

Well, the gerbils are off to rescue one of their own, led by a pirate and with an assortment of other gerbils, capybaras, a support camel and a couple of dogs.........

Swashbuckled · 22/05/2026 20:49

RandomHypatia · 22/05/2026 20:30

If your rescue plan involves conic sections or long division, I'm the 4th century woman for you (never sailed a boat or broken in anywhere though).

Yet….. 🏴‍☠️

MyrtleLion · 22/05/2026 20:50

Swashbuckled · 22/05/2026 20:48

That’s great @MyrtleLion

I must admit, I’m rather loving the cut of my jib in this ☺️

Edited

I'm glad you're on board.

There's a story arc and you play a significant part...

OP posts:
Swashbuckled · 22/05/2026 20:51

MyrtleLion · 22/05/2026 20:50

I'm glad you're on board.

There's a story arc and you play a significant part...

Ooh… shiver mi timbers. Can’t wait ☺️

And “on board”….nicely done.

MyrtleLion · 22/05/2026 20:53

Swashbuckled · 22/05/2026 20:51

Ooh… shiver mi timbers. Can’t wait ☺️

And “on board”….nicely done.

I do my best 😉

OP posts:
EmpressaurusKitty · 22/05/2026 21:07

This is begging to be made into a film!

AngleofRepose · 22/05/2026 21:21

EmpressaurusKitty · 22/05/2026 21:07

This is begging to be made into a film!

Isn't it just? CGI is so good now that I think it could really work!

LazyFoxy · 22/05/2026 21:23

I'll have the 3 sausages and half pork pie please @MyrtleLion
Feeling peckish tonight
And a double bewilderment on ice, in a long glass please duty bar gerbil, after reading some FWR posts from that appear to be emanating from somewhere in the Liverpool area
Thank you

EdithStourton · 22/05/2026 21:43

I'll have that Whisked Ambiguity now, please, bar gerbil...
Bar gerbil? Yes, you... Yes, I know it's very thrilling as well as being very worrying about poor Gosie, yes...
Um, it's a double whisky in there... splendid...

Thank you.

Brains has informed me that she really likes Battenburg - or, as she put it, that pink and yellow cake that was left lying about. So I think Colin is in the clear.

Magpiecomplex · 22/05/2026 21:54

LazyFoxy · 22/05/2026 21:23

I'll have the 3 sausages and half pork pie please @MyrtleLion
Feeling peckish tonight
And a double bewilderment on ice, in a long glass please duty bar gerbil, after reading some FWR posts from that appear to be emanating from somewhere in the Liverpool area
Thank you

Double Bewilderment coming right up.

The Bluestocking Pub: Infinite Cocktails, Questionable Logistics
MarieDeGournay · 22/05/2026 22:07

RandomHypatia · 22/05/2026 20:30

If your rescue plan involves conic sections or long division, I'm the 4th century woman for you (never sailed a boat or broken in anywhere though).

I'm sure the rescue plan will involve comic sections😄
Even though you've never sailed a boat, you lived and worked by the sea, didn't you, in that great port city? You'll do fine!

RandomHypatia · 22/05/2026 22:21

MarieDeGournay · 22/05/2026 22:07

I'm sure the rescue plan will involve comic sections😄
Even though you've never sailed a boat, you lived and worked by the sea, didn't you, in that great port city? You'll do fine!

I've lived in port cities in real life too! I must be a natural sailor (relying on the same thought process that made me try to kid myself having relevant library books on my desk as a student meant I'd somehow absorb some of the knowledge even if I didn't open them).
Off to steal a boat in the dark to test my skills

LazyFoxy · 23/05/2026 00:25

Magpiecomplex · 22/05/2026 21:54

Double Bewilderment coming right up.

Wow- gorgeous
Hic!!
Thanks Magpie
🦊

MarieDeGournay · 23/05/2026 00:29

G'night all, sleep well - especially Swash - hope you have a restful night after that unpleasantness with the solicitor - maybe you should see if Octavia Ocelot does conveyancing?Smile

The Bluestocking Pub: Infinite Cocktails, Questionable Logistics
Chickadeeinme · 23/05/2026 03:39

Meanwhile across the Atlantic, a frustrated chickadee was sitting on a pine cone (very uncomfortable, pinecones) and bemoaning a five hour time difference, knowing her tiny wings would never make the long flight. Surely enough gerbils could construct a tunnel? But even then , it would be at least a week to hop. How could she contribute to help Gosie’s situation?

Inspiration struck - “I know!” she chirped, and flew down to the waterfront in Portland. Calling in at Free Range Fish and Lobster, hard by Becky’s Diner on Commercial Street, she ordered one of their lobsters to be mailed express delivery to Kevin and Steve in Plymouth. “It’ll take them so long to work out how to get the meat off that bugger*” she chortled, “that it will totally distract them from betraying Gosie’s position to the cops.”

But will it get there in time, the chickadee wondered? After all, it is a holiday weekend on both sides of the Atlantic and that lobster might be a little whiffy by the time it gets there.

*In Maine, lobsters are known as bugs, so this is not as insulting as it might appear.

ErrolTheDragon · 23/05/2026 08:09

I’m pretty sure seagulls don’t mind in the least if their food is whiffy.

Foxy was a little optimistic to assume that if Colin finds 3 sausages and half a pork pie that they will subsequently be available for consumption by anyone else.

I’m always up for messing about on boats if you need more crew.

WearyAuldWumman · 23/05/2026 09:08

On the bus from Fife to Glasgow to meet up with an American lockdown Zoom pal - a few ladies meeting for lunch.

Took the early bus to avoid the Dunfermline fans - it’s cup final day.

Won’t arrive until 10.30, given the number of stops. However it avoids the stress of city driving and parking and I’m using my pensioner pass, so all good.

DeanElderberry · 23/05/2026 09:14

optimistic to assume that if Colin finds 3 sausages and half a pork pie that they will subsequently be available for consumption by anyone else

Colin is efficient and tidy-minded.

WearyAuldWumman · 23/05/2026 09:16

Now driving through Dunfermline.
Some fans on the bus, transferring to a fan coach. Seeing more and more black and white scarves in the street.

More fans getting on the bus now.

Thank goodness I got the early one!

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is not accepting new messages.
Swipe left for the next trending thread