Looking for a gym with female-only changing rooms by sex: a journey

[2021x]

I am trying to find a gym in my city (not UK) that excludes males from the female showering and changing rooms.

I was in my gym and there was a man in the changing room- no attempt to be female other than a sports-bra- and since then I was just stressed everytime I went.

I have emailed a gym who say they are trans-inclusive on a case by case basis and said I should use the accessiblity changing room if I am uncomfortable.

I have also put up a post on Reddit in the local page - that got auto-moderated, and then the same post on the national page that is going through normal moderation.

My post says this

I am looking for XXXX gyms that have female‑only changing and shower areas that are restricted by sex, not self‑identified gender.

I’m comfortable sharing these spaces with other females, but I’m not comfortable changing or showering in areas where males may be present.

If you know of any gyms in XXXX please sent me a direct message.

Wish me luck.

Good luck.

What country you're in will affect the chances. In some, gyms legally can't do that.

Hopefully you're not in Canada. You'll get fined or sent to prison.

Elderly women do not become male, so your point is, well, pointless. It's also ageist, but I'm used to that from those who confidently assert they are on the right side of history.

But very elderly women do not commit around 97% of all sex crimes, including voyeurism and indecent exposure. Your situation and the OPs are nothing alike. Keeping males out of female spaces, especially in situations where women are in a state of dress or otherwise vulnerable, is about more than just avoiding discomfort, Surely you must recognise that?

I meant state of undress obviously.

Elderly women don't have penises, so cannot commit rape and cannot force OP to become pregnant through rape. Men can rape and can force OP to become pregnant. The man having spechul genda feelz doesn't alter that.

But very elderly women do not commit around 97% of all sex crimes, including voyeurism and indecent exposure.

Neither do trans women.

You do realise you will one day have one of those elderly naked bodies don't you? Nice if you are then excluded from every facility there is and shunned from society. That attitude is ageist af.

And also very telling it is elderly female bodies you object to, not seeing young female bodies. That is ok in the morning for you?

OP, good luck. In my country asking for a single sex changing room is illegal so hope you are in the UK.

Males do. Trans women are a sub category of male.

Nope - speaking as a woman, I have never once had this thought about other women. But then, I don't go into changing rooms in order to watch other women getting changed.

That's more a certain kind of man thing.

Good luck OP - hope the tide is turning, both here and in other parts of the world.

males with a trans identity are still male. Why should we treat them or see them differently than any other male?

Its not illegal yet as the country I am in is trying to ignore the issue.

The city I am in however is starting to overreach on trans-inclusivity and I think me being told to use the accessible space to accomodate males is evidence of that.

This is going to be a long pebbly road with a lot of trolls isn't it?

I don't feel your pain here. I am having trouble trying to think of the point you are trying to make. Nakedness happens in the gyms/health clubs I've used. If we're lucky, we'll be old one day, in a gym, able to exercise an old body.

My gym/health club has communal showers for pre-swim use and shower cubicles for full showers. Most of the women who ignore the management request to not use the communal showers naked for full showers are well-over 70. That said, the worst thing I can think of is waiting around for them to finish before I can use the pool. They've earned the shower.

They do commit sex offences at a slightly higher rate than other men. They also commit sex offences at a much higher rate than women.

80% of man age 70+ are in prison for commiting sex offences.
There are so few women age 70+ in prison that there isn't much data on them. However, only 4% of the entire female prison population has committed a sex offence.

Also if a female does act in an abusive way towards me I can fight them off.

I can't fight any male over the age of 14 off- no matter how they identify.

@EmilyinEverton if you have an issue with not being able to shower with females as a male, take it up with the males that cause the issue not the women protecting themselves against it.

You do realise you will one day have one of those elderly naked bodies don't you? Nice if you are then excluded from every facility there is and shunned from society. That attitude is ageist af.

My exact words were:

"particularly of very elderly women"

So in actual fact, I am uncomfortable with all nudity in public including my own (thanks for asking). In terms of exclusion, I never said the elderly should be excluded. My preference is that we all be afforded cubicles & not be forced to exhibit ourselves. Lots of women don't use such facilities because they are uncomfortable with their own & others nudity. What about their 'exclusion'?

And also very telling it is elderly female bodies you object to, not seeing young female bodies. That is ok in the morning for you?

It's also very telling to demand nudity. One may say that's rather creepy particularly given its not only men who are attracted to women.

As are homosexual men who commit violent crimes to a lesser degree than homosexual women so I suspect its not effeminate male bodies one needs to be concerned about.

The data you are referring to is inaccurate as it concerns incarceration not offending. Nor could there be any accurate conclusions made about trans women offending because their numbers as a community are too low to be statistically significant.

What data should we use instead?

There is none.

Although there is this study which shows there was no increased reporting in offending when laws allowing trans women to use public toilets changed.

https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s13178-018-0335-z

Why should we believe this research over the forensic data?

Remember for women this is about safety and danger not about identity, therefore the threshold for allowing males in spaces specifically designed to keep women safe is much higher than hearsay.

What about sex crimes? Are lesbians more likely to commit sex crimes than gay men? Can you post a link to the evidence that lesbians are more violent than gay men? What do you mean by effeminate male bodies?