Do you avoid the bathroom if there is a transwoman?

[PeachyDaisy]

I’m going to an industry event next week and I know there will be a transwoman attending. Should I use the disabled bathroom to avoid an awkward encounter or just continue to use the women’s and hope not to run into them?

How can a man who 'passes' as a woman [or thinks he does - there is frequently a lot of wishful thinking going on...] be considered to be 'respectful' if he insists on using facilities which he knows he is not entitled to use?

If there was any doubt about that, the Supreme Court judgment made it very clear that a man's a man for a' that, even if he has a GRC: for the purposes of the Equality Act, he remains a man, and is not allowed use spaces or facilities that are designated for women.

It's just not possible for a man to use the women's toilet and claim to be doing so 'respectfully'. Predatory behaviour, embarrassment, whatever - the principle is that males are not entitled to use women's toilets, no matter how long they've been getting away with it for.

edited for typos

They are still men who are predating on women in spaces they should not be in. They are men using women to fulfil their own desires. They should use the men’s alongside other men.

See my last (but one?) post. Prejudices don’t matter when it’s you, alone in a bathroom, with a much taller, stronger and clearly male bodied person blocking your exit. What they are wearing and their preferred pronouns do not matter in that moment.

the fear and flight or fight response is completely involuntary. Logically I knew the chances of them being there to harm was practically nil, but it did not stop the adrenaline rush and the feeling that I was trapped with no way out, and had they wanted to do me harm, there was absolutely fuck all I could do.

it’s not a feeling I ever want to experience again. Not feeling safe in a women’s bathroom is not an experience anyone should have.

Some kind of ‘sex attack’? Maybe not, but there’s every chance he’d be getting off on listening to women wee, or them opening a tampon wrapper, or having a poo or peeking in the sanitary bin….

I worked with sex offenders for 20 years and believe me, there is a plethora of things that men get off on in women’s toilets when they can get in!

Your first paragraph is wrong on three counts and can be safely disregarded.

Your second misses the point of my comment, which was to question why there should be any "awkward encounter". The only reason I can see would be that the OP harbours prejudice against transpeople and expects there to be issues because of that prejudice.

I was out at a bar on Saturday that is progressive, welcoming, and does not discriminate. I went to the ladies' several times that night and often with transwomen. Had a pee. Nothing happened. The world kept on spinning.

Personally I just get on and go for a wee. Mind my own business. Never had an issue with this tactic.

You were at a bar that ignored women’s rights and allowed men to use women in spaces purporting to be single sex but weren’t? And you have no consideration for the women who have been attacked by men who identified as women in women’s spaces because it didn’t happen to you?

Actually that not true.
In the uk there are more trans murders than trans murder victims. Also trans identifying males are 5× as likely to be in jail for sexual offences than men who identify as men.
This false narrative of trans identifying males being the most vulnerable is a complete reversal of fact as trans identifying males are the safest group in society.
There's never been a trans person murdered in Scotland but I can think of 4 trans murderers in Scotland just off the top of my head, there hasn't been a murder of a trans person in England and Wales since 2023.

Read this slowly. Women have the right, for whatever reason they like, to go into spaces marked as for women only, a bathroom in this example, without a man being present. That includes whether that man is the nicest man in man land, thinks he is something he’s not, or the worst man to walk the earth.

Get over it.

A good reminder of some other emotional manipulation tactics used by some male people to ignore the lack of consent from female people in accessing female single sex provisions. They often will be used by people who support male people being able to use female single sex provisions as we have seen on this thread.

It doesn't matter one iota whether a male person:

-looks feminine

-has worked really hard to be a 'woman'

-has invested in extreme body modifications

-is a nice person (any male person, or their loved ones, who declares that they, a male person entering a female single sex provision to use it, is a nice person is simply contradicting that claim. No 'nice' male person will choose to cause any harm to a female person by entering a provision that they should be excluded from. That is not 'nice' behaviour, it is the opposite).

-genuinely believes that they are female

-only does it when there is no mixed sex alternative provision and they reject using the male single sex provision provided for them.

-has believed that he is female for any length of time.

https://x.com/KnownHeretic/status/2006188958586380420?s=20

and another on consent.

https://x.com/KnownHeretic/status/2006208789578391667?s=20

Ooh we’ve not had the nonsensical Williams Institute rubbish posted here for a while.

If your feminism involves men its not feminism

Excellent response, hope the OP reads this!

So because nothing has happened to you it doesn’t happen?

I regularly walk home from the tube station. I have been on tube carriages as the lone female with one, or more men.

i have never been sexually assaulted or raped. I understand that the vast majority of men will not harm me.

that does not mean no woman has ever been sexually assaulted on the tube. It also does not mean every woman feels safe travelling alone on the tube.

at least there are camera’s, guards and escape options though.

like I said, the involuntary fear I felt when trapped alone with a man between me and the exit. I thought I was safe, my subconscious felt differently.

even though I came to no harm, that fear response alone is not an experience I want to repeat.

Good for you. You don’t get to give away consent on behalf of others though who want to use single sex provisions and not expect a man in there.

They might know but not think it applies to them if they have lived all their adult life as a woman, and going into the gents looking like a woman might also end badly. It's illegal it isn't predatory unless they are preying. This is different to the sort of men who pretend to be women just to access female spaces to spy on and possibly sexually assault women, they should be caught and prosecuted.

I don't even know how you intend to enforce the law without a physical sex check at the door (which I'm sure would go down very well), one poor 'butch' woman was beaten up because people thought she was a man going into the female toilets.

If the first paragraph is wrong on three counts as not it, can you address the first count for me?

No one has ever been able to tell me the difference between a man and a transwoman, and I am genuinely st a loss as to what rhe difference is and why you’d let transwomen into our spaces but not men. are you able to explain?

We know it’s not biology as obviously both men and transwomen have the same biology and women are different.

We know it’s not neurological as the ladybrain and man brain argument is not only offensive but has also been debunked.

Is is presentation? Hair? Make up? Clothes? We are told this isn’t the case but maybe you could tell us?

Apparently it’s not fetish, ever.

Is it ‘if a penis person tells us he’s a woman we should always believe him?’ I mean, knowing how manipulative the bepenised can be, you must realise the ridiculousness of that claim?

Please tell us how we can tell the difference between a man and a transwoman. 🙏

Humans cannot change sex.
Men cannot be women.
If you either cannot understand, or pretend not to understand, these simple facts, what is the point of arguing with you?

Considering the research has been now considered and there is a growing list of countries who are not supplying puberty blockers to children for gender identity purposes now, I don't believe that the numbers will be increasing at the rate it was recently.

Anecdotal feedback has also been showing that many children are now rejecting the demands of those children who are demanding to be treated as if they are the opposite sex.

I don't think that it will be as prevalent as it is now.

Again, for the ‘it doesn’t bother me so it shouldn’t bother you’ crowd.

Good for you. What about the women and girls who have been attacked in toilets and other single-sex spaces by trans-identifying men?

Ahh, but pseudo-concern and righteous indignation are all these people have; if you take that from them then they may have to face reality.

My god, get a life. What a sad existence if you are really worrying about this.

What that an attempt at irony?!

Spot on. I do the same. Never had an issue and, tellingly, never heard of truly verifiable incident of anyone having an issue with this.