Hmm, someone on reddit clains to be the 'transgender manager' at the centre of the M&S bra-fitting complaint.
NOTABLE "As far as I’m aware, M&S have not restricted the bra fit service to ‘Women only’ both from a customer and a colleague point of view. Anybody in our store can be trained as a bra fitter, regardless of gender identity, and any customer who feels they would gain benefit from the service can book an appointment, regardless of gender identity. "
Shame the higher management stopped short of telling this chap the actual store policy.
https://www.reddit.com/r/transgenderUK/s/5JBpZjEdR9
"M&S Trans Employee
Hi, I am the transgender manager in M&S who has been written about in the papers and online recently. I want people to know what actually happened because there are so many lies in the articles.
About March/ April I was working a usual shift in the Fashion home and beauty department of the store, basically overseeing that everything was going well.
While I was taking bra returns from the till point and into the lingerie section of our store I saw on the walkway between lingerie and Menswear a lady and a teenage child looking confused/ for a colleague. I smiled, and said ‘Hi, can I help at all?’
The customer said ‘no thanks’ (or something to that effect, it was 4/5 months ago and I deal with a lot of customers) and left. I didn’t think anything of it and went to put the bras away.
I am not a trained bra fitter, nor do I want to be. Therefore I am not allowed to give any advice or take a bra measurement. I had zero intention of doing anything of the sort, I did assume they were looking for a bra fit appointment so if they hadn’t left, I would have called up the trained bra fitter on shift and directed them to her.
I said absolutely nothing that would show intent of me wanting to personally measure her teenage daughter’s chest.
I also want to say that everyone who I work with knows I am transgender, because I do have a very deep voice and I am quite tall (5”11 not 6”2) and every single person in my store is supportive and accepting of who I am, including my boss, the other managers, and every colleague in every part of the store. At times my workplace is the only safe space in my life which is a bit sad.
A couple weeks later, my boss calls me into her office and says she has received a complaint about this interaction. She had to make sure I did not give any bra fit advice which I did not (and the articles also say I did not too which is one of the only things that they got right). I got very upset because the customers complaint had systematically attacked every part of my being that I hate and cannot control, saying I had a ‘deep booming masculine voice’ and ‘extremely masculine facial features underneath my makeup’. My boss sent away the complaint saying I did nothing wrong and that she and the regional manager are on my side.
End of story, I hoped.
In between the time of the complaint and the first article being published I had gotten Facial Feminisation Surgery done, which again everyone was super supportive of (and everyone also loved the results and being part of the journey) They got me a box of chocolates and a card full of extremely thoughtful messages that I kept by my bedside in hospital. My Boss also got me a heart bracelet that I wear to work every day.
It was my first day back from holiday when my boss called me into her office and told me about the article written in the papers. She got emotional on my behalf which really touched me, said another manager had ripped up and thrown out all the papers with this article in it in our store, and that the regional manager was on his way to personally talk to me regarding this. He also brought a message of support from HIS boss too, the Scotland stores director who has also personally gotten in touch with me.
He clarified that the customer services department had issued an apology to the customer before they actually had the full story, and that the apology had been redacted once my boss and the regional manager set the record straight, saying any colleague can train to be a bra fitter and can work in any section of the store. However, the article writer did not say this, instead insinuating to everyone reading that M&S was not on my side when in fact the whole company is showing their absolute support to me.
I’d like to point out that neither the lingerie department nor the walkway between lingerie and menswear where I asked the customer if she needed any help are ‘Women only’ places. Men historically have been shopping in the lingerie department for their significant others for decades, and how would Men or anyone not identifying as a woman be able to reach the menswear section if it’s walkway was ‘Women only?’
At no point during any shift do I invade any ‘single sex spaces’: our fitting rooms are also gender neutral, and while my job entails me to check on the condition of the fitting rooms (basically if customers have left clothing lying on the floor/ left hangers) I certainly do NOT enter one that is occupied. My sole aim is to provide a clean, accessible area where customers can try on something that they’ve liked the look of.
As far as I’m aware, M&S have not restricted the bra fit service to ‘Women only’ both from a customer and a colleague point of view. Anybody in our store can be trained as a bra fitter, regardless of gender identity, and any customer who feels they would gain benefit from the service can book an appointment, regardless of gender identity. That is perhaps the biggest lie of the most recent article which has ruined my day off.
While it’s easy to go and file complaints against M&S for seemingly being ‘transphobic’, I can say that I have had nothing but an outpouring of support from everyone in the company, and this has not changed my position or the way any of my colleagues see me, people who have also shown incredible support to me during this time. The real enemy are tabloid newspapers twisting stories so that they can attack us, and spread hurtful information that just isn’t true while turning a profit.
M&S respects me as a trans woman, and most importantly, as the hard working, focussed, and customer-driven colleague that I am. 🩵🤍🩷"