Being a man was too much hard work, so I became a woman

[HashtagBlessedHashtagGrateful]

Yep, it's a good old DM article I'm afraid.

Being a man was too much hard work, so I became a woman: Inside the transmaxxing trend where men swap gender to get 'female' benefits like cheaper car insurance, free meals and sex | Daily Mail Online

I've not started a post in this section before, so apologies but I saw the headline and thought it would be one to share. "Transmaxxing" is a thing in incel culture and I know has been discussed here before. So yeah, being a woman is also now meaning you have failed at being a man 😡

I think that's Iran, and very different situation because when gay men are faced with "death penalty or transition," it is objectively easier and better to choose transition over death - that's not the type of man we are talking about here, anyone with humanity feels sorry for these men, it's a totally different interpretation of "easier," when you are wanting a free meal rather than to survive.

I think this is a useful article as it is useful to spell out to people how closely aligned incels are with the new wave of trans women, how sexist and horrible it all is. The underlying assumption all these men have that they should be seen as superior in some way to women and are shocked that a beautiful, young, intelligent, popular woman appears to be doing better than they are hunched over their computers doing nothing but being male. These ones just think they are playing the system, working it to their advantage, but it's all in their heads.

I think there are parallels here with Jihadi men - they have totally failed in life (by their standards): unintelligent, unattractive, not nice or kind, unpopular, poor, single... they latch onto something that makes them super special with very little effort and absolutely no need to reflect on their own decisions or opinions.

There is a problem in society with disenfranchised young men, that are being told they are great either by families or on-line while all the evidence points to the contrary. I don't mean to imply this is a feminist issue to solve, but I do think it should be recognised (even if it's just to protect ourselves from it).

Yeah - being rude as usual, but just imagine when they walk into a "Ladies" and unzip - and then think "oh!!, um, hmmm... ah a cubicle is free, so I sit and wait? Oh no look at the seat... how about squat?... oh but how do I aim?... oh... Ah relief... Oh but did it go where it should? ... Oh drips - guess I need tp ... Oh no there isn't any ... OMG I WANT MY DICK BACK!!"

This is the Jordan Peterson thing, isn't it? I could never quite understand why he was so controversial, because I read his book and it just seemed like generic dad advice. But then his core audience is lost young men who never got generic dad advice.

His message to the incels has always been: have a shower, clean your room, get a job, contribute to society and all those things will make you a more attractive proposition to the women you meet.

Maybe we might wish for lost young men to have a guru who isn't JP, but to reach them, it would have to be someone like JP. That's where I part company with Helen Lewis, who seems to feel that lost young men really need to listen to Helen Lewis lecturing them about their privilege.

Sorry not RTFT but the DM article just popped up on my Facebook feed and I think it's great that ridiculousness like this is being showcased and harming their cause even further. - the comments are very heartening

As has been said these men confuse the insta, glossy version of what being a woman is.
Young, beautiful, the world at your feet and plenty of older men queuing up to buy you dinner if they think there is a shag in it for them.

Yeah, if they are online in their mums house all day I can see how they think this is the life that women have.

It's pure and simple misogyny.

They don't even notice the 99.99% of women who don't have that life (including their mums cleaning up after them and washing their clothes, making their meals, paying their board and lodging) so they would have no idea what 'being a woman' actually entails.

Could not agree with you more. Sadly being better versions of themselves would involve them putting in some effort (switching off their computers for more than 30 seconds, finding a job, not just wearing different clothes and growing their hair long).

I don't know if I'm more offended by their perceived victimhood, or their utterly ridiculous appropriation of womanhood.

Why on earth does the Daily Mail refer to these men as “she”?

It knows they’re just pretending to be women but it goes along with the pretence.

I think it possibly is easier from an incel pov - they have zero chance with women. What I don't quite understand is that surely as incels they are straight men?

I'd be willing to bet they're not getting the actual thing they want, which is sex with women. But I bet they're getting more attention. Certainly online, if not in real life.

Gay men will be paying attention. And we all know there are a lot of women who will be all you're stunning and brave, albeit, that's where the attention ends.

For men who get neither relationships, sex or attention, and spend their life online, it's probably a step up.

I don't know that just attention will hack it.

I suspect they really do think women get free meals and free stuff and free homes just for being women.

And that just declaring themselves women will get them all that from men.

They know so little of the real world that they haven't worked out the details. Like, as PPs have pointed out, that for the scheme to have any chance of working you'd have to be physically attractive, sexually available and actually female, and to find men who are willing to pay for a sexual relationship with you.

Their plan is based on woeful ignorance and internet-fuelled prejudices and fantasies and explodes on contact with reality.

Less hard work.

Haha. The man is delusional. We know the reality.

Because they don't want the Press Complaints Commission to come after them for 'misgendering'.

I agree in real life, the sex part won't be working, I think they're fantasists.

In the small amount of incel stuff I've read they absolutely think women are privileged. And that the good looking men get all the women.

They believe women can have sex whenever they want, but they gate keep it from men like them. And because all they want is sex, they think this is a massive privilege for women.

If they were a woman, of course, they'd be on their back 24/7, happy days.

The disconnect comes in that they're heterosexual men. So what are they crowing about? They cannot be crowing about having gay sex. Because firstly they're not gay, and secondly, they could be having gay sex as men, no need to transition.

That's why I think it's all online. Gay men flirting with them online, and women telling them their legs look amazing in that dress, you go girl.

I have read accounts from transwomen, saying they did all the right things, even danced on the tables at clubs, but no man came up to them. They say the men can have sex with ever he likes, they'll never complain, they'll be subservient and admiring, so what's not to like?

But that is essentially gay men, or bi, trying to attract straight men.

India Willoughby did it on Big Brother. Juno Dawson insists that their boyfriend is straight.

But incels aren't gay, so I just can't see what they're actually trying to promote.

'being a man was too much hard work so I stayed a whiney boy-child and expected my mother to wait on me hand and foot'

These men who dress up as women in the hope that heterosexual men will want to have sex with them- they are men themselves and must know that heterosexual men are not sexually attracted to other men?!

Not if they're convinced by the genderist propaganda that gay men are attracted to the same gender and straight men are attracted to the opposite gender. So they are adamant that they are now woman gender and therefore straight men should be attracted to them.

Meanwhile in the real world, the overwhelming majority of people are attracted to others on the basis of actual sex. Even most "allies".

I wonder how many male trans allies are willing to 'put their money where their mouth is', so to speak?!

The entire edifice relies on the denial of reality.

I think most of them end up very disappointed. Brainwashed into it, and reality-ed out of it.

Willoughby was very put out that a straight man wasn't interested, obviously because they didn't view Willoughby as a woman.

Didn't Willoughby go on to say they'd never even been kissed since their transition?

If you're a gay man denying you're gay, your pool of people to date is going to be tiny.

Gay men and straight women don't validate you, and straight men and gay women don't want you.

You might be okay with a gay man who is bi. But I also read of a transwoman upset because they thought that the bi man sleeping with them might have viewed them as a man, not a woman.

That pesky reality has to be denied not only all the time, but really convincingly!

I think they often don't realise that there's such a thing as "bad sex", and that for women, "bad sex" means pain, internal injuries, and bacterial or yeast infections. The most common reason for a woman to fake orgasm is because he's taking too long and it's hurting her.

You might be okay with a gay man who is bi. But I also read of a transwoman upset because they thought that the bi man sleeping with them might have viewed them as a man, not a woman.

That pesky reality has to be denied not only all the time, but really convincingly!

It reminds me of those young straight women, who are addicted to a particular genre of Japanese porn, who claim to be men and pop up in online spaces complaining that their boyfriends don't see themselves as being in "queer" relationships.

There's a small subset of men, who mostly claim to be straight, who do have a sexual interest in transwomen. But they're explicit that this is a fetish, and they definitely don't see transwomen as being the same as biological females. You can deduce that from their keen interest in dick; I assume the female attire helps them tell themselves they're not doing anything too gay.

If you're a transwoman who very much wants to be validated as a woman, you don't want to sleep with those guys, but those guys may be the only guys who are interested in sleeping with you.

It is disturbing that a generation of people in rich countries have been let grow up imagining that because becoming an adult and then living an adult life is indeed hard work, that they are owed a magic opt-out. There isn't one. That is the human condition, there is no alternative (other than death). If you have XX chromosomes (or a rare DSD variant) you will be a woman, XY chromosomes (or rare DSD) you will be a man.

No choice this side of the grave so suck it up.

You're let vote at 18. Start to strain towards adulthood by then at the latest, to earn that privilege.

You would think so, logically. But this isn't about logic, it's about some kind of fantasy world 🙄

It's called Yaoi. I can confirm from personal experience that gay male porn, Japanese or not, will aggravate any feelings of dissatisfaction that a woman has with her female body and any desires she has to be male. And that includes "slash" fiction.

Owen Jones accused someone of homophobia when they asked him if he'd have sex with a transman with a vagina.

Another trans ally (forget who, but must have been a straight man) said:
"TWAW, except for relationship purposes."

Hypocrites, the lot of them.

Did someone keep the receipt for LOJ saying that?