I think I'm becoming transphobic

[MyGhastIsFlabbered]

I feel unpleasant writing this but I need to put it down somewhere. I know trans people, I have no problem with them and I've always said TWAW. But recently, especially in light of the Sandie Pegge, Beth Upton case my views are changing. I don't have a problem with people wearing what they want, I'm even fine with pronouns.

But I'm starting to believe that you cannot change sex. All the surgery and hormones in the world will not make you a woman. Saying 'I'm a woman' doesn't make it so.

What's worse is that my 15 year old stepdaughter is identifying as male and I just find myself getting so frustrated whenever they refer to themselves as 'a dude'.

Am I transphobic or just realistic? How can I come to terms with my feelings as they are evolving?

Are you not bored popping up here spouting your nonsense over and over? Why read a board that you hate? Baby names bore me so I don't go on there, especially not to tell them I hate the discussion of baby names. Is there not a better use of your time?

Despite being asked a million times, can you attempt to answer why you think biological males should take part in women's sports, be placed in women's prisons and attend rape counselling sessions with female rape survivors?

Are you not all bored with agreeing with each other that transgender people are all mentally ill

They are mentally - if not "ill" then "affected" because this feeling that you are a different gender is literally in their minds. It can't be in their bodies because, absent modifications, their bodies don't change.

And it is ok to be mentally ill, we are all far more open to discussing mental health and that can only be a good thing.

But as we know from anorexics etc, it is not healthy or helpful to collude in a delusion. For sure we can "be kind" and most of us are (pronouns, names etc) but many of us do not buy into, or reinforce the delusion that a person can change sex.

But I'm starting to believe that you cannot change sex

///

My mind boggles that you ever believed this

However what you are describing is simply pro women and children.

💯 this

Are you really not bored with thinking this is all about a mythical third sex such as 'trans people', rather what its about, which is the rights women and girls to safety, privacy and dignity? Are you really not bored with pushing your Male Supremacist narrative, that a re-badged male in a dress is not a fox anymore and should be let in the hen house?

Are you genuinely not bored with your hateful Male Supremacist agenda?

Gosh.

Are you not going to assume good faith and convince the OP that they are wrong and present evidence to explain why?

I feel the same way. I detest the term 'cis woman' I'm just a woman. I also refused to have my pronouns on my email and work badges. Caused a huge thing at work but I really don't care. People can do as they please and be who ever they want. Just leave me out of it!!

The word transphobic is overused so much it means "you are saying something I don't like".

I think a lot of people struggle to understand that you can respect a person and NOT agree with them or their ideology. These people have a very narrow worldview. I have lots of catholic friends who really believe in transubstantiation. I don’t believe in it but I still respect them. The problem (or at least one of the problems!) of trans ideology is that you are not allowed to have your own thoughts. I was told by a trans activist that I was transphobic because even if I used the (in)correct pronouns, if I didn’t believe it in my heart, I was still transphobic. Maybe I am particularly contrarian but there is no way on earth I could believe that men can become women even if I am told that I am the worst person on earth to not do so. And being told I have to believe it just makes me dig my heels in more!

And isn’t it remarkable that because some posters insisted that they couldn’t possibly bear to have these matters discussed under general feminism, and they personally couldn’t scroll past threads they were not interested in due to lack of impulse control, some other posters feel it is somehow worthy of derision that most of the posts on this particular board express the same opinions as the majority of the the UK population on this issue.

Fuck. Who would have thought it? And who the fuck would have thought siloing off this board would lead to posters abusing others in this way?

Exactly. I don’t think anybody really believed this. Even those who claim to do so, pretty quickly make it clear that it’s just a mantra to them as they do actually differentiate between trans women and women in many situations.

It really isn’t. Calling someone transphobic at the drop of a hat just means you don’t have a sound argument for supporting this ideology, it runs alongside Stonewall’s ridiculous ‘no debate’. It really does show up people’s inability to engage in factual, intellectual debate.

U ok hun?

Quote fail! That concern was for izimbra.

Also, women are really puny compared to men, but this is glossed over because it's a population-level trend, rather than a binary attribute. Any woman who's been attacked by a man (or even a teenaged boy) knows this.

The strongest woman in the world has a grip strength less than that of the average eighty year old man.

Is this an attempt at satire? Are you not bored and/or embarrassed by behaving like a five year old in the playground calling people the equivalent of ‘poo poo head’?

It would be better if people did stop being transgender because it’s harmful for everyone, especially those who have been told that they can change sex, because we all know that they can’t, and as we also all know, colluding with someone’s delusions is particularly damaging. Genuine sufferers of body dysmorphia need therapy, not validation. How anyone can support an ideology that sanctions young women, who are mostly autistic or neurodivergent, having healthy breasts removed is beyond my comprehension. The supporters of this ideology are the ones who need help, not women who understand basic biology.

Exactly @theilltemperedqueenofspacetime

Hence also - women's sports, prisons, single sex spaces in medicine, refuges etc

(Love the name btw)

Are you not all bored with agreeing with each other that transgender people are all mentally ill

The elephant in the room there is the enormous generation of and consumption of sissy porn.

Had a conversation with a relative about this. Said relative embarrassingly refers to herself as, "very woke"...She's not. I tried to explain to her how a person cannot change their biological sex. Her response? She replied, "I disagree". Huh? What??

Professor Robert Winston, recognised as an expert on human reproduction said on Question Time that ‘I can categorically state that people cannot change sex, it is there in every cell of their body’, to which Fiona Bruce replied ‘but there are some people who would disagree with that’!! You can’t ‘disagree’ with facts, it’s laughable 😂

You might as well disagree with gravity.

Dear @MyGhastIsFlabbered

Some time ago I was where you are now. I needed to know more about the topic, so I read around it and found some problems (data integrity, freedom of speech, teaching unfalsifiable assertions to children as facts, medical ethics, balancing the protected characteristic of gender reassignment with those of sex and belief).

I raised the issue with trans friends and was told that noticing the problems is transphobic. I realised that my previous TWAW stance had been a polite fiction that I hadn't even believed at the time. But I still hoped that reasonable people on all sides would eventually hammer out solutions. I expect you know how that's going.

Upton's testimony has been the last straw (yes, I am slow on the uptake, since you ask).

I now think we should raze the whole thing to the ground. The GRA should be repealed. By making trans people's medical history, and GRC status, personal private information, this law has turned every person's sex into ppi, not even discoverable with a birth certificate.

This is antisocial, dangerous, and makes it impossible to balance protected characteristics under the Equality Act. Concealing your sex should be a crime.

I don't hate trans people and I dont agree with discrimination against them, but I want to remove the legal basis for transness, so they become just people who make themselves look like the opposite sex, for their own reasons, but don't pretend to be the opposite sex.

More Miranda Yardley/Debbie Hayton (yes, I know, sorry not sorry), less RMW.

Is this transphobia? Possibly. (Awaits deletion.)

I quite literally do not give a stuff if people want to call me something as illogical, stupid and fucking meaningless as "transphobic" because I understand facts and reality. It's a non-word.

It has absolutely no power. Not over me, not over you, not over anyone.

The fact that we're constantly informed by our great all powerful government , that we are in an epidemic of MVAW ... (no shit Sherlock)... but, they've proved that they refuse to put their head above the parapet to say that men- however they identify, in women's spaces, is a potential danger.

My business was targeted by a bunch of TRAs for daring to say that young girls in school need safe spaces away from teenage boys for their safety and dignity... common sense you think... but no, it was deemed the absolute worst assault on 'gender non conforming' boys and I should be publicly flogged and have my business blacklisted for this terrible transphobic slur.

Nah ... you're not transphobic ... you are a realist who understands the threat some men pose to women and girls.

My brother...

...you've been mansplained womanhood by a man.

Surprise surprise.