I think that there really does need to be an important understanding about the language expectation that seems to be one of the sticking points here. And I think it then becomes blockage point.
I think we, in this discussion, are all in agreeance that sex exists as the primary categorisation of humans. And that female people with or without transgender identities are part of that category.
No person then with a transgender identity can be said to disappear out of the world if others don’t perceive them as they wish to be perceived. They are real people. With real lives rich and full of many interactions.l with other people everyday
I think most agree that people can present how ever they wish, they can dress however they want. They can use whatever terms of reference they want. That is their choice and everyone should have it.
I think the issue partly comes down to the degree to which those who have an identity, any identity, get to dictate how others see them. And obviously some of the components of our overall personal identities are more important than others. But there does seem to be an aspect that some of those with a gender identity feel the need to control how others see them and interact with them.
Most of the time, I doubt there is an issue at all. Because why should there be an issue, that aspect of their identity is irrelevant to that interaction. Or it should be unless a person really does have a prejudice with a group of people.
There are then the moments when it does matter. When sex matters. And if a person who has a gender identity respects those situations, then that seems to work. There of course, are others who insist that they should have access when they should not and we get court cases as we see with Sandie Peggy and Beth Upton.
But so far, if those with gender identities respect those provisions, there isn’t really much dissension in opinions on the surface, I think.
Where there is disagreement is that some people believe that others in society should act as if that identity is material reality. This is where it gets tricky because bluntly, no other person in the world should be expected to believe something that is real when it is not.
It doesn’t matter even how sincerely felt the identity is, how dedicated people are to that identity, no matter how many changes to their body they have had, it is still an identity that doesn’t change the sex category of that person. And that at times they will be treated as the sex they are not the identity they are.
And language is a part of this. Some people need their language to reflect the material reality of what they perceive. And for laws and policies, having clear language that cannot be misinterpreted is imperative.
So who gets to dictate the language people use to describe others? Within the boundaries of society, no one unless the government has laws that limit language. Yet, it seems that a group of people believe that they should be able to control other people’s language when it comes to how they are described. Of course, they don’t have that right to control the language people use.
I think much of this discussion has been about language and who controls it, combined with whether people also should control how others perceive them.
The answer, of course, should be no one controls the language or thoughts of others.
So, if a person wants to present themselves however they wish, however makes them happy, if they respect the needs of others then I can see little disagreement from
others. It is when people are told that they have to think and speak as if someone’s identity is material reality when it comes to the sex a person is that the disagreement is clear.
Because why should anyone control another’s thoughts and speech? Or even expect to?
Yet, this is what is being done by a group of people who use shame through name calling such as ‘transphobic’ and ‘anti-trans’.