LGB Alliance conference disrupted by TRAs

[Imnobody4]

Do these idiots really think they are clever.

https://x.com/JamesEsses/status/1844755779665948762?t=8n-3lIZxX9BIED6MRh9pGg&s=19

🚨Breaking🚨

Trans activists have just disrupted the annual Conference being held by LGB Alliance by releasing insects in the main hall.

These nasty individuals who seek to disrupt a peaceful conference of lesbian and gay people show themselves up to be the real bigots.

Today parents are under so much pressure and some loose sight of the most important function of a parent which is to support a child to become a resilient functioning adult who can cope with and contribute to the society they live in.

Completely agree with that.

If you want your kids to be happy, you set them up to deal with a world which isn't always kind and doesn't always go their way.

The word here is resilience. And it's the word that keeps popping up for an entire generation.

"The word here is resilience. And it's the word that keeps popping up for an entire generation."

This is so true. A couple of years ago our HR introduced sessions on personal resilience. I questioned this with a colleague to be told this was really aimed at the younger members of staff, many of them recent graduates but lacking some of the basic interpersonal skills to function in a workplace.

My childhood was tough. My mum impressed on me the importance of getting a job, having my own money, learning to do things myself. I really wonder what the future holds for these young people who seem to be utterly incapable in so many ways.

From an open letter from Jamie Reed to the cricket girls:
https://lgbtcouragecoalition.substack.com/p/shields?utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&triedRedirect=true
Some people do not deserve women.

"So, my darling young girl in the elevator. My darling young spirit. You can hate me, hate me with everything that you have. You can ball up your fist and beat me with everything that you have and I will still reach out to hold you. You can scream at me until your voice is hoarse, but I will not leave you.
I will be the battering ram and slam against those men and their pharmaceutical poisons who promise you an even fancier shield than the ones I tried.
Instead of combat boots and the grime you have been told a beard and a lower voice will work. It won’t.
Instead of a septum ring and a scowl you have been told that cutting off your breasts will protect you from ever feeling them groped and torn at. It won’t.
I will not leave you. I will be here when the shield fails, when you crumble to the ground.
I will be the battering ram against the surgeons, who promise you that just cutting off your breasts, will make the pain and the anger go away.
Eventually, radicalization burns out.
You’ll grow old and wiser.
You’ll learn that in 2024, we were ALL in The Upside Down. And when you do, please find me. I will embrace you with open arms."

Oh, I wish you hadn't. I find all that American over-the-topness ick-inducing. And very grandiose.

I’ve enjoyed reading the musings about parenthood here. I have a small daughter, she’s not school age yet. I often wonder how I will prepare her for the world and have found the posts insightful.

One thing I do know I want to instil in her is the ability to say no. I feel I was raised in quite a typical female stereotyped way of being nice to people, accommodating people, serve people, please people etc without being taught that it’s absolutely okay to put some boundaries in place and say no.

Obviously, it’s nice to be good to others and to help them. But I was so chronically unable to say no to people that when I got out of my girls’ school bubble and into university where there were suddenly a lot of young men wanting things from me (well one thing) I found saying no exceptionally difficult. I got into awful relationships and awful situations. I hope I can equip my daughter with more skills than I had about when you need to put yourself first and listen to your own voice.

I suppose it is, but I know I'm not alone in feeling that somehow it's unwise for me to be myself around children.

I grew up in a very rural environment. Farms are dangerous places and many of my parents' sentences seemed to start with the words "Don't ever climb on/play with/touch...." said with such seriousness that I would never have dared go against them. I also knew a few people at school who had a parent die in agricultural accidents so grew up with a healthy respect for and consideration of the possible consequences of acting without thinking..

These kids come across as though they've never been told not to stick a fork in a toaster (I knew an academic who did this then complained to Estates that the toaster was faulty as they'd got a shock).

This is a comment on permissive gentle parenting, in case it wasn't obvious.

TBF, given the problems we had with DS and him not sleeping, I think you are somewhat grossly unfair to your daughter here.

We tried EVERYTHING. And I do mean everything. We are definitely not shy about saying no to him. No seems to be our favourite word and we are much stricter than almost all his peers parents.

In the end we went with the option that made us keep our sanity when it came to sleep. The loss of sleep we had really was affecting us. We just ended up doing whatever meant we got the most sleep.

We've said to loads of people that DS just doesn't sleep - he can't switch off - and they haven't believed us. Its only when they've seen him first hand be the bloody duracell bunny that they start to get it. And that we haven't been permissive about it.

DS has since been diagnosed with ADHD, which isn't really a surprise. My parent had me and I slept. My brother came along and apparently didn't sleep for 6 years. If it was about parenting style, how come they got it right with me but wrong with my younger brother?

I think its far too easy to judge when it comes to this - but its unlike other areas of parenting. If you are being woken 4 or 5 times a night, its literal torture.

@RedToothBrush totally accept everything you say.

but the vast majority of children do not have any neurological conditions, and I think that is what is being talked about.

i would like to add i have a huge respect for all your well thought out posts.

i hope you know you are loved and respected in this place.

I totally agree, but I'd also caution about being critical over sleep. Anything else, I'm more open minded about. Lack of sleep affects your ability to function full stop. Deprivation of sleep is used as a form of torture for a reason. You don't necessarily make the best decisions.

In the end deciding to stop fighting and just go with the flow and what worked on any given night was the best decision we made. It removed the stress. And allowed us to find a way to sleep. The very last thing I needed was someone saying how she had a magic routine (oh how I laughed when her second wasn't a dream).

I don't think it's a neuro-diverse thing either. I just think some kids sleep and others don't. Just like adults.

Give her the benefit of the doubt on sleep.

It's one of them where we just went fuck we need to pick our battles. Think about it that way accordingly.

Slings, snuggles, and bedshares were the most pragmatic and practical way for us all to get as much sleep as possible. And I'm a big soft hippy at heart.

I agree with Red that I think sleep is kind of outside of 'behaviour'. Physical closeness and affection are very basic needs, especially for babies and children.

And it depends very much on the individual child, too.

I’ve taken on your responses. I think you are right, and I’m a bad grandma. I’ve asked for my post to be deleted.

Zebra I'm sure you're a great grandma. There's lots of different ways to look at these things and different approaches. We're all just muddling along for the most part. I hope you don't think anyone was judging your post.

Whoops, I realise that I've made myself sound really dodgy, and that's absolutely not what I mean! I've never said or done anything objectively inappropriate or offensive or strange around children: no child has ever been harmed on my watch. But quite a few friends have expected me to adopt their gentle parenting style (or whatever other style they've adopted), and the effect has been to undermine the confidence I once had that I was good with children.

This.

Theres a difference between surviving sleep depreviation and permissive parenting.

This thread connects to a few thoughts I have been having, not about parenting but about being young.

I (just about!) remember being young. I wasn't a goth but in a similar subculture so let's use goth as an example (I had enough goth friends to know it was the same for them).

What I realise as an adult looking back was there was such an undercurent of policing and judging. Were your clothes right or were they an outsider's view of a goth? If they were right, were they right because you were expressing your actual tastes, or just following along? Was your Victorian silver pendant actually victorian (cool), modern from a goth specialist shop (acceptable) or from a high street shop (not acceptable). Did you like the right music? Did you know the album tracks as well as the hits? Did you have the first album? Did you have the unpopular album? The worst possible thing was to be judged as not real, as not quite getting it. A plastic goth.

I see so much of this in the young trans people and TRAs especially the female ones. "No one else understands us. It's us against the world. But are you really one of us? If you won't go as far as it takes, if you have boundaries, how can you say you really care?"

I think it's a feature of self-defined subcultures. The desire to belong pushes people to extremism to prove their right to belong. Not too bad when it's to be extremely gothy (although actually yes bad because the dynamic of enabled predatory men who had managed to establish themselves as long time scene members to exploit young women and adolescent girls who were attracted to the protected status that being picked by someone with unimpeachable goth credentials gave them) but bad when it's a subculture that seeks to prove identity through serious medical body modifications, redefining women's personal risk awareness and boundaries as bigotry, and promoting the dismantling of sex-based protections and social analysis.

I know many of the women caught up in this will feel discomfort about the gap between what they are supposed to believe about trans women and their own experiences of being a woman and of trans women in women's company, but instead of trusting themselves that something is not right, they will be blaming themselves for not being able to overcome this transphobia, and turn that into fighting the TRA fight even harder so no one guesses their secret shame. They will be too scared to ever acknowledge it to each other, so each girl believes the others have no doubts.

I spoke with the 2 girls who were photographed in the lift earlier in the day at the event.

They were relaxed, happy, laughing, and having a good time. In no way were they nervous, threatened or frightened by anyone at LBG Alliance. Their press release spoke of terror and fear, but it was very evident there was no threat to them at LGBA and they were treated very kindly.

They were having a lovely time surrounded by lovely people. I wonder how they reconciled their morning with their afternoon?

They must be very used to cognitive dissonance by now!

They are not honest people. Their whole worldview is centred around being dishonest.

They are not honest people. Their whole worldview is centred around being dishonest.

It's important to always keep this point front of mind.