How best to answer 'What are your preferred pronouns?' in an intervew

[NancyDrawed]

I have been out of the workforce for a very long time but finally have an in-person interview later this week.

The confirmation email is signed by a name followed by (he/him/his). I need to get a job. But I am trying to get my head around what I would say if I was directly asked what my preferred pronouns are.

On principle I would like to say 'I'm not a follower of that ideology so use whichever you see fit' or something along those lines, but is that likely to mean I have no chance of getting the job?

I am clearly female, so a small part of me would want to say he/him/his just to see the reaction!

It might not even come up at all, but I'd like to be prepared.

No one is going to address you directly using any pronoun other than “you” so that bollocks

It's interesting how some posters (yes Elle, you're one if you want a name check) have interpreted:

resistance to being forced to declare a position on gender ideology (which is what preferred pronouns can signal, extensive discussion upthread)

As

Intention to signal a definite GC position (which is implied would be a bad thing, and somehow much worse than the opposite).

Elle you go even further to suggest that non compliance to the Gender ideology suggests an interviewee would try to take legal action against the company.

That's quite the stretch, but it's helpful of you to comment in this way, as it illustrates what women are up against - any shred of resistance to gender ideology is being framed as a being a litigious nuisance.

It's false equivalence being employed to shame and frighten women and we don't like it. It's not 2019 any more.

Incidentally, if illegal actions weren't being taken against GC people on a regular basis, there wouldn't be such a slew of court cases, mostly which have been won. This isn't because'those GCs are terrible litigious people' it's because of the widespread phenomenon of laws being incorrectly interpreted to disadvantage rex realists.

And this is relevant to preferred pronouns, because that is where it all starts, the belief that men can become women due to their feelings and that that should override women's rights.

Again, especially for those who think that asking/offering your pronouns - the term "preferred pronouns" is transphobic. Stop it.

And for everyone who persists in the "it's grammar, innit" give over. It is a place holder for "are you GC or do you believe in Gender Identity"

If we would all speak in clear terms, it would be a lot better.

It's not ridiculous to draw initial conclusions (which can be subject to change) about a person or institution in the absence of detailed information - humans do this all the time.

Similarly, if I had an interview somewhere that had a lot of seemingly irrelevant information about, for example, vegetarianism in their communications, I might wonder whether my meat eating would be thought to be a problem and wonder how to answer if odd questions about it popped up in interview.

This wouldn't be 'taking offence' - it would be reasonable to wonder whether they had an agenda.

Yes, it’s not “preferred pronouns” it’s just “pronouns.”

.

tbh i wish everyone would shove off with the "what are your pronouns" and "my pronouns are" and just come clean and say what they mean.

The world would be a much happier place and we wouldn't be constantly confronted with the twatty "nyah nyah you just used a pronoun, see it's not hard" brigade

The question isn't accessible no matter how it's phrased

Gender ideology mangles language so it is not plain English

Exactly😁
Can just imagine the response -
"OK! Thank you for your time..."
😁

Exactly. The time my ds was asked the question in an interview, he would have been completely flummoxed if I hadn't warned him after seeing the email inviting him to interview that it was a potential question.

He went with He/They "for inclusivity" and got the job. He and the asian girl were the only non-pronouny people employed that year.

i do wonder in this kind of situation (someone asking another person what their pronouns are) if the interviewee is autistic and takes everything literally. It may be very confusing or cause a lot of stress to be suddenly confronted by that.

So i think OP planning potential answers is a good idea.

And it's not actually grammar as grammar has rules that include using sex to determine which pronouns to use to refer to someone so if "it's grammar innit" there is no need to ask the question.

'I have no preference' would be my reply.

All being well the pronoun person doesn't actually give a shit & is just 'being kind and inclusive'.
A manger at my place has pronouns in his email sig & he's rolled his eyes at me about inclusivity and trans something something.

It's meaningless.

Yes. At my place there's basically a clear line. Above a certain level of management they all have pronoun signatures. Below that, bar the odd junior woman who has picked it up from Linked In etc as "the right thing to do" and the odd Visibiity Network bloke who is signed up as an ally to everyone, no pronouns. It's very obvious that the senior levels havebeen told to do it to model inclusivity.

The unintended consequence of this, of course, is that it makes very visible how massively our senior levels skew to He/him. Reader, I know this may astound you, but not only are they mostly He/Hims, they are mostly AMAB he/hims. What are the chances?!?

Yes, it’s not “preferred pronouns” it’s just “pronouns.”

Of course it is. No need to beat about the bush, best make it clear it's fine to compel other peoples speech, discriminate against people with protected beliefs different from one's own.

Indeed.

Just another fine example of making language less accessible and how the gender woo interpretation is the 'only correct' one.

Except it isn't - obviously everyone can and does have 3rd person pronouns used about them. Not everyone has 'preferred pronouns' though, myself included.

Therefore 'pronouns' does not equal 'preferred pronouns' - they are different.

No one should be compelled to answer this

It shouldn't be a question as it's not accessible

No - they are literally the same.

Gender critical ideology does not accept the existence of gender identity, so you think your pronouns are sex-based. That’s fine. They are your pronouns.

Likewise, non-gender critical people accept their gender identity, so their pronouns are based on their gender identity, In most cases, they match their sex. They are not “preferred.”

There are many more false positives for gender non-conforming cisgender people mistaken as transgender, so asking pronouns benefits them, too.

I have never heard of an employer asking pronouns at an interview, but way to invent an imaginary problem to get mad at.

No - they are literally the same.

Nope. 'Preferred pronouns' accepts that people may not always use the pronouns you might want them to.

A pronoun that doesn't fall naturally from the mouth of the speaker isn't functioning as a pronoun, it's functionally an alternative name.

Obviously said tongue in cheek because that's how most people would feel if being asked this stupid question 🙄

No, they just seem the same to you because you are operating within a fixed belief system that constrains your ability to see different points of view. Kind of like fish having no word for water, genderists can't conceive that the words historically meant for sex could just mean, well, sex as an impartial and objective quality rather than subjective identity.

You cannot conceive that someone can acknowledge the word for a sex decribes them regardless of how the attached cultural constructs align or not to their sense of self, so for you a gender critical person still "identifies" as a woman. But that's your framing. It does not describe the experience of a gender critical woman at all.

As a gender critical woman I can simultaneously understand that I am a woman, that I am constrained by the social constructs of womanhood even though I do not identify with them, envision a world where these constructs are not forced upon me, describe the difference between the social construct , the physical sex and my sense of self and also the mechanisms through which despite being separate they intertwine and operate together through the intersectional and multi-layered power structures and conventions of society.

I feel very sorry for genderists that their fixed mindset prevents them from building the same understanding. I truly think it would give them the self knowledge and freedom that gendrism falsely promises but deliivers only a shaky sense of self that has to be constantly defended, and the false belief that they are feared and hated.

They cannot compute, @FlirtsWithRhinos

It isn't a question.
As it hasn't been asked.
It's a hypothetical question posed by the OP who's worrying that they might be asked.

It's like playing chess with a pigeon....

It isn't a question.
As it hasn't been asked.

You get that it comes up in many work scenarios, right? It's hardly outside the realm of possibility for it to come up in a job interview, is it?

Sorry meant to quote @TofuTart