Smear appointment reminder with a Mx

[catin8oots]

Have a routine smear booked at my local surgery and just received a reminder text saying it will be with Mx Firstname Surname.

I have no idea if this person is a biological woman or a biological man.

Can I call and ask?

Looked already. No pictures.

Just on hold now.

All of whom were professionals, so ultimately it didn't matter to me.

The male consultant who sexually assaulted me was also a professional. I'm sure you didn't mean to sound dismissive or belittle other women's concerns, but someone being a professional doesn't guarantee anything.

The sex isn't always correct for trans doctors. Male trans doctor Kamilla Kamaruddin was shown as 'female' on his practice website when working as a GP.

Abso-bloody-lutely! DO ring and ask @catin8oots And as a pp said, walk away if it's not a woman - who was born a woman!

No WAY is anyone not born female giving me a cervical smear - EVER.

Just been told by the receptionist that 'all of our nurses are female'

So I asked - is that biologically female and not transgender? The Mx pronoun was confusing

She then said 'well as far as I know they are all female'

So I said is that female by sex or gender? As I would like to know the sex of the person carrying out my intimate procedure. Can you confirm she is not transgender?

She said well I wouldn't know that (!!!!) it's not information that we hold but I do know Keri and I can assure you that she is female.

So clear as mud then.

Did you ask why Keri's title was given as Mx and not Ms or Mr? Eg is it a typo or how Keri wants to be addressed?

So clear as mud then

Not really, she's told you they're all female as far as she knows.
She said twice she knows them as female.
What else do you want from her, if you won't take her word for it, what should she do, "check?"
How exactly

In that case, I would write a note to the surgery confirming the conversation you've had with the receptionist and reiterating the fact that you only consent to having the appointment done by a biological woman. Ask them to confirm that this will be honoured.

Give them the opportunity to change your appointment date or time if they need to.

Then, go along to the (possibly rearranged) appointment prepared to leave it if your request is not honoured.

Then follow this up with another letter reiterating that you did not give consent for your appointment to be carried out by anyone other than a biological woman.

I, too, have good experiences with male gynaes so wouldn't mind a Mr. The situation described by OP would still give me pause as I'd wonder about the motivation of somebody potentially male larping as a woman/woman-adjacent going into smear tests of all the possible job choices.

I don't know I'm not as hot on all the terminology as many posters on here but I would have liked her to confirm that 'all our nurses are female' meant that they are biologically female and not actual men

This is good advice. Thank you

It's the Mx title that would have me hesitating and maybe the 'as far as I know' comments from the receptionist.

She then said 'well as far as I know they are all female'

Don't patients have the right to request a same sex nurse/doctor? And so in order to grant patients that right, the surgery would therefore have to know the sex of the staff.

I suppose in all likelihood this is a female member of staff and the issue has simply never come up at this surgery. So when people have asked for a woman, they've never had any problem easily fulfilling the request with a female, and the questions have therefore never gone any further.

From Google @catin8oots

Mx (pronounced 'mix') is a gender-neutral alternative to gender-specific titles such as Mr, Mrs, Miss, and Ms. It can be used before a person's full name or surname by those who wish to avoid specifying their gender, or those who prefer not to identify themselves as male or female.

My money is on this nurse being a transgender woman. I would cancel.

I must say, none of the nurses I have ever had appointments with have been Miss or Mrs or Mx anything. It's just Jenny Hill, or Louise Evans, or Linda Harris etc. No title before the name. (Only 'Nurse' obvs!)

It makes absolutely no sense to ask if they are transgender! Would you have asked if the nurse was transgender if the title was miss? Surely if you want to change gender you would want your title to indicate your new gender. It’s much more likely this nurse is biologically female but perhaps identifies as non-binary.

I’m going to hazard a guess that the average GP receptionist - and I’m using my GP receptionist mum and her colleagues as a benchmark here - isn’t spending a lot of time at all thinking about transpeople and is somewhat confused by the questions. She’s confirmed Keri is a woman. She’s confirmed Keri is female. She doesn’t know what you mean by confirming that she’s not transgender when she’s already told you that Keri is female and a woman. The number of medical practitioners who are transgender isn’t significant enough that your average GP receptionist has ever likely worked with one.

Slightly tangential but would a HCP who’s not a surgeon usually have Mr, Miss etc in front of their name? I thought it was a convention to distinguish surgeons from other doctors and I’d be surprised to receive a message like this.

However I wouldn’t by surprised if this person is a woman and the question just hasn’t come up before - or nobody has dared to ask.

I wouldn't personally mind having a smear test taken by a male ( and I respect that many women would mind), but I'd like a healthcare professional what has a good understanding of basic biology. So that would be a Ms or a Mr

I got one saying for women and “people with a womb “ .. wanted to rip it up

As many women as possible should go for their smears, if it makes trans men more likely to or feel included that's a good thing imo.
It says women on there too.

It will be obvious on the day whether this person is female or not. If it's not a female you have every right to leave. I know that I would do just that.

The point is that we shouldn't be having to go through these ridiculous hoops and neither should receptionists and other staff. Women have the right to know the sex of the person undertaking an intimate procedure and the right to exercise a choice.

It's more usually a nurse these days.

WTF..I would absolutely refuse to have a smear done by a man.. It's painful enough for me already. Mx! Pah.

This is what I would do. Realistically, lots of transwomen would use Ms/Miss as a title, so Mx doesn't really give anything away, it's just made OP wonder about it.