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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

"Transphobic bullying is rife": 15 y/o trans boy's view of coming out at school

1000 replies

ButterflyHatched · 20/12/2023 17:44

A rare and refreshing example of the mainstream media actually publishing a young trans person's own words on the subject of their own existence and how the government's draft guidance is likely to affect the people it directly pertains to.

‘Transphobic bullying is rife’: a 15-year-old trans boy’s view of coming out at school | Transgender | The Guardian

‘Transphobic bullying is rife’: a 15-year-old trans boy’s view of coming out at school

Newton Carey gives his view after draft guidance was issued by the UK government

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2023/dec/20/transphobic-bullying-trans-boy-view-of-coming-out-school-uk-government-guidance

OP posts:
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Helleofabore · 27/12/2023 18:09

ButterflyHatched · 27/12/2023 12:14

...have I ever said I haven't been?

This is the 'Sex and Gender' discussion board on a forum that is as internationally renowned as a recruiting ground for anti-trans ideology as it is for advice on bringing up children.

I'm one of the targets of said ideology, directly affected by the efforts of anti-trans activists. I am also heavily involved in bringing up a pair of children who are about to reach the age where gender begins to become something they are consciously aware of. I hope both of them can grow up without having to have the rough ride I did, but it's possible that they have also inherited the same genetic mutation I have, and it is separately possible they might turn out to be trans - it isn't something that has come up in conversation and nor is it something I intend to bring up, but they will encounter the subject eventually at school.

Today's discussions on this site are frequently next year's headlines. The amount of misinformation and outright mythology regarding childhood transition in particular is enormous. I can actively help correct untruths and assumptions when they crop up and threaten to become additions to GC dogma while adding to the corpus of discussion on this site.

I would like anyone who needs it to have, as an absolute bare minimum, access to the resources I had as a child. That is an incredibly low bar, and yet it is already an impossibility for most. Even what is currently in place is actively under threat and has been the subject of a sustained attack for years.

There was a time when this country was, seemingly almost by accident, one of the world leaders for trans health and care - especially among children. I used to be genuinely proud of living here. Now, every day I see the headlines and I see how far we have fallen - and the effect it is having on young people I know.

Why the fuck would I sit by and not try to make things better?

Reader’s note:

Some trans activists with extreme views have positioned some feminists as ‘anti-trans’. Normally, a post such as this would be deleted by MnHq as it includes significant negative generalisations about MN FWR. However, as yet it is likely that no one has reported it.

This post has positioned careful statement of personal boundaries such as not believing that male people can ever be ‘women or girls’ and the constant discussion about how trans lobby groups have failed children and adolescents with the push for affirming only treatments as being ‘ideological’ and ‘anti-trans’.

When something is based directly and specifically on material reality, it is not ‘ideological’. This is a very dishonest statement made by this poster in the quoted post.

Also, to position the boundaries of female people as ‘anti-trans’ by logic makes the extreme trans position that ignores those boundaries as ‘misogynist’ and ‘anti-women and anti-girl’. It is just another fallacy spread by these extremists. They never evaluate their statements for such flaws.

If any child is going to have any medical condition that would impact their puberty, I would suspect by now that the condition would be testable, even just as puberty should be starting. Therefore, a male adult leveraging children’s potential medical conditions in the way this post indicates is a red flag for safeguarding for me. It is an indication that the adult is likely to be invested in these children’s ’gender identity’.

Particularly when considering this statement:

I can actively help correct untruths and assumptions when they crop up and threaten to become additions to GC dogma while adding to the corpus of discussion on this site.

The information overwhelmingly provided by people on MN is evidence based and is in line with what independent child medical experts recommend.

Again, the framing as per this post is ludicrously based in this poster’s deeply entrenched prejudice about MN FWR and, hypocritically, their deep ideological beliefs. Because if independent child medical experts are disagreeing with this poster, it is yet another major safeguarding red flag.

No one should be bullied. No child or adolescent should be given a low standard of care by any organisation charged with their care. Particularly about their current and future health, mental and physical. No child should be failed by an evidence free or very low evidence based treatment because some heavily invested adults have demanded this.

This male adult is actively lamenting that currently the UK is carefully reviewing their treatment of children and adolescents with gender dysphoria. Apparently, this scrutiny is based in hate and has apparently set the UK backwards in this poster’s eyes. Because it seems that in this poster’s view, the UK shouldn’t be constantly reviewing the evidence OR the lack of evidence.

Again, as has been repeatedly pointed out, this male adult has never grasped that the majority of adolescents who are registered at the UK gender clinics (and others around the world) are now FEMALE. Not male. And female people have not been studied in any depth for their unique needs in this situation. A fact not acknowledged by this poster.

Puberty blockers have significant negative consequences for female bodies. Look up Lupron. The impacts on male bodies is bad enough but female bodies is life limiting and shortening. Yet, this poster has continue to advocate for them. And testosterone for the female body is also life limiting and life shortening, and this is also well documented by now. Read about the East German sports women.

However, even the authors of the Dutch Protocol have stated publically that there is doubt that this treatment plan is working for female adolescents because they have different needs and they are declaring trans identities for reasons different to male adolescents. Another fact ignored by this poster.

The direct impacts of past treatment on UK children and adolescents are apparently being researched by Dr Hilary Cass. Yet apparently the UK is, according to this person, the worst in the world. Yet is one of the only countries doing the hard research. I will leave it to readers to think about why a male adult who transitioned under the direct influence of a medical condition, apparently an unusual genetic issue, is advocating to any child or young person who is not experiencing that medical condition . Is it appropriate?

Here is the interim Cass report for readers to peruse for themselves.

https://cass.independent-review.uk/publications/interim-report/

Note, no peer reviewed evidence has been produced that shows an improvement long term for the gender dysphoria or the mental health of adolescents and child transitioners. None.

Here is a Dutch documentary released very recently discussing this:

And the reanalysed data from the UK child and adolescent gender clinics.

The newly released peer reviewed reanalysis of the UK study. McPherson & Freedman both worked on the initial analysis of the patient clinical data.

https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/0092623X.2023.2281986

Psychological Outcomes of 12–15-Year-Olds with Gender Dysphoria Receiving Pubertal Suppression in the UK: Assessing Reliable and Clinically Significant Change

Susan McPherson & David E. P. Freedman

Published online: 29 Nov 2023

Abstract

The evidence base for psychological benefits of GnRHA for adolescents with gender dysphoria (GD) was deemed “low quality” by the UK National Institute of Health and Care Excellence. Limitations identified include inattention to clinical importance of findings. This secondary analysis of UK clinical study data uses Reliable and Clinically Significant Change approaches to address this gap. The original uncontrolled study collected data within a specialist GD service. Participants were 44 12–15-year-olds with GD. Puberty was suppressed using “triptorelin”; participants were followed-up for 36 months. Secondary analysis used data from parent-report Child Behavior Checklists and Youth Self-Report forms. Reliable change results: 15–34% of participants reliably deteriorated depending on the subscale, time point and parent versus child report. Clinically significant change results: 27–58% were in the borderline (subclinical) or clinical range at baseline (depending on subscale and parent or child report). Rates of clinically significant change ranged from 0 to 35%, decreasing over time toward zero on both self-report and parent-report. The approach offers an established complementary method to analyze individual level change and to examine who might benefit or otherwise from treatment in a field where research designs have been challenged by lack of control groups and low sample sizes.

So, why is an adult male individual pushing their political agenda so hard and declaring anyone stating that there are issues as being ‘anti-trans’? A derogatory term and one framed in hate?

Who benefits from this male adult doing this?

Interim report – Cass Review

https://cass.independent-review.uk/publications/interim-report/

Datun · 27/12/2023 18:44

I will leave it to readers to think about why a male adult who transitioned under the direct influence of a medical condition, apparently an unusual genetic issue, is advocating to any child or young person who is not experiencing that medical condition . Is it appropriate?

it's utterly bizarre that butterfly doesn't advocate for more research, when they claim to have had a horribly isolated life seeing only doctors, and that they have had to keep their true self secret for 20 years.

They appear to be a living endorsement of the need for more research.

TheClogLady · 27/12/2023 19:07

Yeah, that sounds absolutely miserable.

my kids have complex needs but have been treated with evidence based medicine by NHS departments with proper oversight.

Even my tiny cancer-survivor has a better quality of life than the awfulness that Hatch claims, and my DD has got someone else’s chromosomes as well as her own (a very generous anonymous German dude)!

(4.5 years in remission, thanks to evidence based medicine!)

Helleofabore · 27/12/2023 19:08

Datun · 27/12/2023 18:44

I will leave it to readers to think about why a male adult who transitioned under the direct influence of a medical condition, apparently an unusual genetic issue, is advocating to any child or young person who is not experiencing that medical condition . Is it appropriate?

it's utterly bizarre that butterfly doesn't advocate for more research, when they claim to have had a horribly isolated life seeing only doctors, and that they have had to keep their true self secret for 20 years.

They appear to be a living endorsement of the need for more research.

So true.

You would think all trans people would be pushing hard for research. Because surely the research would prove all they repeat like mantras.

And yet… they denounce such research and denigrate people pointing out the deficiencies in the current research and treatments. It really is such a contradictory movement. As in they contradict themselves all the time and seem oblivious to their contradictions. And seem to blame those contradictions on someone else.

HagoftheNorth · 27/12/2023 20:30

Helleofabore 👏👏👏👏🙏 that is magnificent. Somehow, I don’t think Butterfly will be back on this thread challenging your post!

JanesLittleGirl · 27/12/2023 21:11

HagoftheNorth · 27/12/2023 20:30

Helleofabore 👏👏👏👏🙏 that is magnificent. Somehow, I don’t think Butterfly will be back on this thread challenging your post!

Purely because it's Panto Season; Oh yes they will!

Quietplaces · 27/12/2023 21:47

ButterflyHatched · 27/12/2023 11:27

Oh absolutely, the list of countries that generally outlaw LGBT people is very large indeed, and as a bisexual woman, most of those apply to me as well - no accidentally escaping by flipping polarities here!

A subset of 14 of those countries who already count trans people as being in violation of their LGB-phobic laws about sexuality by default even have extra legal categories to justify brutalising trans people. While most don't acknowledge transness at all, some see us as especially deviant and worthy of criminalisation. It's a pretty rotten venn diagram of awfulness.

Nobody wants you to be worse off than you are now or give up existing protections. The existing legislation in this country that protects trans people from discrimination already allows them to use the correct facilities. If this legal protection were to be removed, it would actively harm a minority group.

Thankfully the periodic attempts to chip away at these protections - which were desperately hard won and have only existed for less than half of my life - haven't succeeded yet. Time is running out before the Tories are out of government and the general window within which it is considered appropriate to debate the validity and rights of this particular minority group in parliament, let alone in general public discussion, is slowly closing.

I wonder if we will we see the same degree of contrition in the decades to follow as we have done from past opponents of the fight for LGB equality and protection? While it would be nice, it won't undo the harms being caused right now.

Allowing people to socially transition at school does present challenges to the way we currently handle things - largely because it highlights how inadequate the existing system is and how antiquated many of its underlying assumptions are. It shows us that we can - and must - do a lot better at protecting children from harm - something that many of the posters here have been all too aware of throughout their lives.

It isn't misogynistic to support children who are experiencing gender incongruence; to protect them from bullying; to help them work out what they need and how to best negotiate their situation, and to teach those around them how to be sensitive and compassionate.

Thanks for mansplaining that all to me. Fortunately for you, you are biologically a male and can side swerve most of the things I detailed. Eg, in the countries concerned they don't miraculously stop mid rape and stoning when you say "but wait, I'm physically female but I identify as a bloke!"

If you equate the transgender community's struggle for protections with that of the LGB community then answer me this - how do you square that with the fact that acceptance of gender over (biological) sex automatically means conversion therapy for lesbians (I don't feel qualified to speak for gay men!)? I've been repeatedly informed I am not entitled to refuse 'lady-dick' as biology doesn't matter one bit and if someone says they are a female I must not rule out sex with them or I'm being transphobic.

I'd like to support children with gender incongruence, protect them from bullying and help them negotiate their situation but unfortunately people who have similar ideologies to you are trying to get them gender conversions instead.

SinnerBoy · 28/12/2023 04:49

ApocalipstickNow · Yesterday 16:45

Irony Butterfly- love them especially In A Gadda Da Vida.

Oh, I haven't listened to that for years; I really must try to fix my record player.

FrippEnos · 28/12/2023 13:38

ButterflyHatched

I remain mystified by the 'compelled speech' angle.

That's ok because I remain mystified by those that whine and have tantrums about being mis gendered, yet insist on making up and forcing labels on other people.

If it is so important to have the correct pro-nouns because its 'respectful' then TRAs and their Allies shouldn't be forcing labels on others.

FrippEnos · 28/12/2023 13:50

ButterflyHatched

Why are you using the term "incongruence" instead of dysphoria?

StragglyTinsel · 28/12/2023 14:18

FrippEnos · 28/12/2023 13:50

ButterflyHatched

Why are you using the term "incongruence" instead of dysphoria?

It’s got more syllables so butterfly thinks it sounds cleverer.

ButterflyHatched · 28/12/2023 14:47

FrippEnos · 28/12/2023 13:50

ButterflyHatched

Why are you using the term "incongruence" instead of dysphoria?

Updated terminology. Quite a few of the trans guys I know have never been particularly dysphoric and spent years thinking that they couldn't possibly be trans and/or shouldn't transition because of it.

It is possible to be transgender and also not be crushingly sad - some trans people clearly feel dysphoria very strongly, and those were the ones who got picked up by psychiatric services as the early type definitions, but not all do.

We are still getting over the harm done by decades of 'transition is the worst possible outcome short of death and must be avoided at all costs especially if it leads to a person who Looks Queer' as a policy.

OP posts:
MargotBamborough · 28/12/2023 14:54

ButterflyHatched · 28/12/2023 14:47

Updated terminology. Quite a few of the trans guys I know have never been particularly dysphoric and spent years thinking that they couldn't possibly be trans and/or shouldn't transition because of it.

It is possible to be transgender and also not be crushingly sad - some trans people clearly feel dysphoria very strongly, and those were the ones who got picked up by psychiatric services as the early type definitions, but not all do.

We are still getting over the harm done by decades of 'transition is the worst possible outcome short of death and must be avoided at all costs especially if it leads to a person who Looks Queer' as a policy.

Right.

So, can you explain why someone who isn't even that dysphoric needs to have access to single sex spaces for the opposite sex?

RedToothBrush · 28/12/2023 15:04

ButterflyHatched · 28/12/2023 14:47

Updated terminology. Quite a few of the trans guys I know have never been particularly dysphoric and spent years thinking that they couldn't possibly be trans and/or shouldn't transition because of it.

It is possible to be transgender and also not be crushingly sad - some trans people clearly feel dysphoria very strongly, and those were the ones who got picked up by psychiatric services as the early type definitions, but not all do.

We are still getting over the harm done by decades of 'transition is the worst possible outcome short of death and must be avoided at all costs especially if it leads to a person who Looks Queer' as a policy.

Boom.

If they are dysphoric, what are they? And why do we have to shove up and accommodate them?

Answers on a postcard.

ButterflyHatched · 28/12/2023 15:07

MargotBamborough · 28/12/2023 14:54

Right.

So, can you explain why someone who isn't even that dysphoric needs to have access to single sex spaces for the opposite sex?

I can't speak directly for people who aren't dysphoric - it has pretty much defined my life since I was old enough to think! We clearly have similar needs though.

Not sure why I should get special treatment just because I'm clinically sad about the gender incongruence I experience and others aren't.

OP posts:
Topofthemountain · 28/12/2023 15:07

I think "updated terminology" means "ever shifting sands and making the terminology fit

WickedSerious · 28/12/2023 15:15

Topofthemountain · 28/12/2023 15:07

I think "updated terminology" means "ever shifting sands and making the terminology fit

Everything's so goddam fluid these days.

RedToothBrush · 28/12/2023 15:27

Topofthemountain · 28/12/2023 15:07

I think "updated terminology" means "ever shifting sands and making the terminology fit

Updated terminology = how we widen the bandwidth of white males being able to call themselves a minority and use this against actual vulnerable groups.

DialSquare · 28/12/2023 15:36

I see Butterfly has admitted that gaining access to female single sex spaces and the females in them is considered as special treatment.

catduckgoose · 28/12/2023 15:44

If there's no dysphoria then what is it? A cross-dressing hobby?

Boomboom22 · 28/12/2023 15:45

And finally, it comes out that really the goal is to get teens to have life limiting surgery for no real reason other than to make other adults feel OK about their own life choices. Right out there, openly said. The surgery should be available to all for no medical reason just because this will make them more likely to be accepted.

EasternStandard · 28/12/2023 15:46

Without dysphoria women are back to letting any male into their spaces just because what?

What are the men doing that allows access

Helleofabore · 28/12/2023 15:53

Boomboom22 · 28/12/2023 15:45

And finally, it comes out that really the goal is to get teens to have life limiting surgery for no real reason other than to make other adults feel OK about their own life choices. Right out there, openly said. The surgery should be available to all for no medical reason just because this will make them more likely to be accepted.

Yep.

After I noticed more and more teenagers openly stating that it was a lifestyle choice for them. That they did not have any dysphoria, it changed how I perceived this ‘life saving medical treatment’ narrative.

It really seems to be elective extreme body modification to fit an image. And in the UK paid for on the NHS.

It is always great to have someone who is a self described pillar of the trans community confirm this though. Brilliant stuff.

OldCrone · 28/12/2023 16:21

ButterflyHatched · 28/12/2023 14:47

Updated terminology. Quite a few of the trans guys I know have never been particularly dysphoric and spent years thinking that they couldn't possibly be trans and/or shouldn't transition because of it.

It is possible to be transgender and also not be crushingly sad - some trans people clearly feel dysphoria very strongly, and those were the ones who got picked up by psychiatric services as the early type definitions, but not all do.

We are still getting over the harm done by decades of 'transition is the worst possible outcome short of death and must be avoided at all costs especially if it leads to a person who Looks Queer' as a policy.

"Trans guys". These are young women who aren't dysphoric but who are having double mastectomies and taking testosterone. And you want to encourage this? While middle aged men, who are also not dysphoric (they love their ladydicks) aren't having any surgery at all, but take "titty skittles" to make their moobs grow.

Why do you think "transition" is the best outcome for young "trans guys" (young women who think they want to be men)? Particularly if they're not even very sad about being women.

This is the reality for women who physically transition:
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/4964729-scott-newgents-experience-with-transition-regret

Why do you want to push these young women down this harmful path?

If we needed any more proof that Butterfly is driven by misogyny, I'd say this is it.

Scott Newgent's experience with transition regret | Mumsnet

DALLAS MORNING NEWS EXCLUSIVE: "THE KINDNESS OF OTHERS. Full Piece Copied Below. [[https://archive.ph/mUYLz https://archive.ph/mUYLz]] "You're t...

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/4964729-scott-newgents-experience-with-transition-regret?reply=131525311

ButterflyHatched · 28/12/2023 16:23

Quietplaces · 27/12/2023 21:47

Thanks for mansplaining that all to me. Fortunately for you, you are biologically a male and can side swerve most of the things I detailed. Eg, in the countries concerned they don't miraculously stop mid rape and stoning when you say "but wait, I'm physically female but I identify as a bloke!"

If you equate the transgender community's struggle for protections with that of the LGB community then answer me this - how do you square that with the fact that acceptance of gender over (biological) sex automatically means conversion therapy for lesbians (I don't feel qualified to speak for gay men!)? I've been repeatedly informed I am not entitled to refuse 'lady-dick' as biology doesn't matter one bit and if someone says they are a female I must not rule out sex with them or I'm being transphobic.

I'd like to support children with gender incongruence, protect them from bullying and help them negotiate their situation but unfortunately people who have similar ideologies to you are trying to get them gender conversions instead.

I'm visibly physically female. I can't get read as male. I can't 'side swerve' misogyny, but I have a paper trail that reveals me to be a trans woman. I'm really not interested in a competition to see who wins oppression top trumps here and I'm not going to have another bloody 'oh no you don't' 'oh yes I do' argument in this thread so feel free to continue maintaining that you can always tell and that I've never once in my life experienced misogyny if you find the alternative distressing.

You are entitled to date -and not date- whoever the hell you want, and anyone who tries to guilt trip you into a relationship is being a vile, coercive creep regardless of what's between their legs. Not sure what that's got to do with conversion therapy though.

Glad you don't want children with gender incongruence to be bullied. Is transition (presumably what you mean when you say 'gender conversion' - I quite like that, sounds like something you'd find in a 90's cyberpunk short story by someone who'd never actually talked to a trans person before and thought they were being edgy and transgressive) ever an appropriate option for anyone?

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