Too good not to share

[BoreOfWhabylon]

Seen on TwiX on a thread announcing that Eddie Izzard is running for Brighton Pavilion

x.com/DaytimePubSmell/status/1725273634606915730?s=20

He came from Eastbourne with a thirst for knowledge
He studied drama at Sheffield college
That's where I caught his eye
He said he's gonna stand for Labour
I said in that case I'll vote against yer
He said fine. And then in 30 seconds time, said
I wanna live like female people
Well what else could I do?
I said "I think I'm gonna spew"

I took him into town to Primark
I dunno why but I had to start it somewhere

So it started there

We went into the women's section
He had a laugh and then had an erection
I said Christ. Can't see anyone else with a bonkon in here

Are you sure

You wanna live like female people
You wanna see whatever female people see
You wanna be like female people
You wanna be like your ex girlfriend Susie
But he didn't understand
He just smiled and had a wank

Cut your hair into a bob
Buy some dresses from a shop
Wear a pair of plastic tits
But keep all your other bits
Still you'll never get it right
When you lie awake at night
Watching hours of sissy porn
Coz you won't accept female's born not worn, no

You'll never live like female people
You'll never do whatever female people do
Laugh along with female people
Laugh along even though they're laughing at you
And the stupid things that you do

You [redacted] fool.

😂Thank you for sharing!

Hilarious. Thank you.

Excellent.

I so hope someone records it!

Ha! I just new this would be about this! Was waiting for someone to share. Absolutely hilarious. And obviously fine and gentle piss talking because it's a man doing it, not an evil TERF hag-witch crone.

Christmas number one!!

Might be just identifying as a man, I suppose.

Genius

True. But it's all about identity innit? So as long as one is publicly identifying as a male human, which it is, then it's absolutely fine to take the piss. Whoever himself is, I love him/her/them/it.

Brilliant!

Actually, KJK has a not bad singing voice. She could record it and turn up at every one of Eddie's appearances to blast it out over speakers.

That is genius 😂😂😂

This is the TwiXter's profile

😂😂😂😂😂

Thanks for that. Could her Jarvis singing it in my head.

Oh, I am going to have to work that phrase in to the conversation with my ex tomorrow when he has (supervised) contact - “ludicrous dickbiscuit” is just amazing 😂🤣

That is unbelievably good. Especially the chorus.

<twirls>

Although I wasn't sure whether Dickbiscuit was one word or two. The name's Biscuit, Dick Biscuit 😂

'Call me Dick. Richard Biscuit was my father's name'

CAKE: Do you have any brothers?
DICK: Dunk and Digestive
CAKE: Sisters?
DICK: Sarah. He was eccentric, not mad.

I could see Mr Menno doing a good YouTube video with these lyrics 😊

Bore thankyou so much for that

LudicrousDickbiscuit 👏👏👏
😂

Brilliant!😂
I was waiting for the word that rhymes with 'bob'. It wasn't there. But it is in my head though.

Fantastic. I'd do a clapping emoji but fuck knows what might happen.

I took him into town to Primark

😂