Yes you should tell her she's talking bollocks!!! Cos she's vulnerable.
This will be the third time I've posted the following this week.
Posted the following on another thread this morning, but it feels more appropriate here. It is worse when considering in the context of actively giving this information to autistic children:
I'm just reading DeTrans by Dr AZ Hakeem and its fascinating to read back comments here about an inability to understand the world in certain ways displayed by a lot of trans people because of the huge correlation with autism.
The way he describes it, it sounds a lot like its almost a social communication version of not developing the concept of object permanence. Object permanence is understanding that an object still exists even if you can't see it - think babies who get very excited at peek a boo because they don't grasp that you are still there the whole time.
Instead he says that trans people with autism lack a 'theory of mind' - the inability to really discern what another person with who they are interacting is thinking combined with black and white thinking - which leads to them living by rules which they decide to be right and expect others to see the world as they do, and if others don't follow their own rules they get very upset and think everyone else is wrong.
This taken to the extreme means that they have very black and white ideas of what males and females should look like and how they should behave and divide the world up in this way. They then decide that because they like or do things for the opposite sex they therefore ARE the other sex. And everyone else sees the world in the same way. A bit like a baby who thinks cos they can't see an object, it no longs exists and that no one else can see it either.
He proposes that this goes as far as thinking that once they are 'presenting' as the opposite sex by these stereotypes they pass and because they haven't got the concept of the rest of the world thinking differently, they believe that everyone else sees them as the opposite sex simply because they've put on the corresponding clothing regardless of the other glaringly obvious clues to sex.
In their heads it IS all about them and what they think. If they think that putting on make up makes them look female then every one else will perceive them in the same way. Regardless of all the other things that mark their sex being obvious.
Its just about how they organise the world - so affirmation is probably just about the worst thing you can do, rather than unpick this and teach that things are not gendered. If this is all true, to affirm at all in a medical capacity isn't just irresponsible its actively grossly negligent and discriminatory.
The fact we have numerous posters who can not conceive that sex discrimination relates to biological function they don't have and will affect everything from the design of things to impact on everyday life rather than presentation and stereotypes, really really highlights the point. We've seen so many examples all saying and doing the same thing. Its fascinating to see in real world play outs.
We CAN NOT order the world along these lines because it doesn't reflect reality and how the world works - it only reflects the beliefs of people who can't see things from the perspective of others.
By definition this is about as far removed from being inclusive as it is possible to be.