A tragic but insightful detransitioner

[WomenShouldStillWinWomensSports]

The heartbreaking story in the DM today of a boy who was bullied and gaslighted by his classmates into believing he was something he wasn't, whose religious mother demonised him for being a young adolescent developing interest in sex, who at age 17 went to a mental health professional for help and was told he was transgender, and went through full MtF transition only to realise he wasn't trans at all.

This one is particularly striking because he wasn't caught up in an internet trend, it sounds more like it was pushed on him by everyone around him until he believed it and was shunted through these invasive interventions.

I'm struck by the young man's insight into why this happened to him and what he thinks needs to change to the current system of medicalising teens.

Here are some quotes I thought were particularly apt:
"Speaking about the time, he continued: 'I felt like I was playing a role, a role that I was faking - which is obviously exactly what every trans person does but they mostly don't think of it that way."
and
"'The transition didn't solve anything, it only made everything worse and it was killing me.
'I tried to kill myself on several occasions. I was miserable.
'In the beginning of this year I knew that there were only two options for me - go through a detransition or die."

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-12250695/I-trans-surgery-woman-19-four-years-later-Im-man.html

I find this whole practice of castrating healthy teenage boys and performing double mastectomies on healthy teenage girls absolutely abominable. This is the scandal of the century and we will be judged in the history books for allowing it to happen.

It would be much better if the daily Mail hadn’t used the horrendous euphemism ‘bottom surgery’ throughout.

@IncomingTraffic I agree, the language surrounding reporting of this needs to change. It needs to be clear exactly what has been done because people need to face up to the reality of what is being taken away from these healthy children.

Absolutely.

hopefully he can begin to get to the roots of his psychological difficulties. the relationsghip with the girlfreiend seems a bit of a strange one to me. My suspicion is that he is actually gay - but still in denial due the disgust towards male bodies he was brought up with.

@NotHavingIt It's entirely possible, or he could even be bisexual which would add another layer of confusion in a society that largely sees it that people are either completely straight or completely gay. I think the revulsion at men but wanting them to hurt him is something he needs to unpick in therapy and hopefully come to terms with his orientation.

No, he said he was only convinced he was gay because of peers. He was never attracted to men

I found this interesting:
"She is a biological woman and I was playing the role of a fake one.
'It was weird for me during those first months. I wouldn't have detransitioned if I was in a relationship with a man. "

Only when he spent time with a real woman did he realise he wasn't one.

Poor guy

I’m not sure anyone could possibly read that article and have any insight to decide they understand his sexuality better than he does. Or that it’s at all helpful to speculate on it either.

The important thing, from this man’s perspective, is that ‘gender affirming’ care failed him enormously.

I do find it annoying that people think effeminate men or butch women must be homosexual. People are more complicated than that.

Poor lad. This is exactly the sort of young person I want to protect - somebody instinctively gender non conforming. His only crime was being effeminate and his peers pressured him into believing he wasn’t a man.

Genital mutilation surgery should be illegal.

I have followed Daniel on Twitter for a while - it’s an incredibly sad story. He was failed.

I'm sure the surgery would make the question of sexual attraction more difficult too.

It's not unusual for sexual attraction to be confused in teens anyway, and not to really settle until some time in the 20s. He was still very young when he stated to undergo medical interventions. And men who are castrated and on hormones tend to report significantly reduced sex drive.

It may be impossible to know what would have happened to his sexual development if he'd just carried on growing up normally.

I find this odd too, you see it in discussions of people like Jazz Jennings, who they assume would have grown up to be gay.

Sorry, no, just because a three year old acts "girly" does not mean he will be a gender non-conforming man when he is grown, much less gay.

This ^. If it was happening in some Third World country the liberals would demand sanctions. If not bombs.

I hope some class action can see these young women and men awarded massive damages. They will need every penny. Certainly the greatest medical scandal since Thalidomide.

I think that's probably more because Jazz has always been very open about their attraction to boys from at least early teens. And there have been comments from them in the shows that quite strongly suggest they were at some level aware that they were gay and that this was unacceptable to parents. It's a tragic case on many levels.

“although he is hoping to get a transplanted penis in an experimental surgery that will help him feel complete again”

This sounds unlikely.

I thought that, too. Getting a penis transplant, however experimental, seems to be another manifestation of the "you can change sex" gender woo woo and it's disappointing that detransitioners haven't necessarily clocked that sadly, the damage is irreversible. Doing things to the outside of their body doesn't fix the ongoing endocrine problems or other lifelong issues they will face.

It'll be interesting to see what comes of his hopes for a transplanted penis, or a reconstruction, whatever.

I did once watch an M2F surgery online and the entire penis was removed, but I have also read that sometimes a 'stump' is left (why, I have no idea as I wouldn't have thought that would be wanted by the patient). But if a stump is left, it'd probably be easier to attach a new one. Either way, I can't think there'll be a very high success rate.

What does Daniel mean by the way we move our hands and fingers, btw? Anyone know?

It actually sounds like he’s still in the grip of a predatory medical practitioner who, even at this point, is seeking him the lie that surgery will fix his problems.

That poor young man. Maybe if he’d lived in a family with more moderate religious views and went to a school where homophobia was not acceptable, he wouldn’t be in this situation now. It’s not clear from the article if he’s actually in the UK. Not that it matters, apart from the school bullying as I’d have thought that would be spotted.

I don't click on Mail links, but if the article leaves out the fact that he's in the Czech Republic then it's unusually poor.

It says he’s from the Czech Republic but it’s not made clear where he grew up or had the surgery. That’s why I was so surprised homophobia would be allowed in his school if he was in the UK.

This is spin I'm afraid.

Jazz was transitioned as a toddler,and had puberty completely suppressed. He has never had sexual feelings at all, or sexual arousal, or an orgasm.

Being attracted to boys doesn't mean anything like what it would for a someone who hadn't been the equivalent of made into a child eunuch.

Jazz has also been on dates with girls, btw. In both cases, it seems to be an attempt to have some sort of connection, to get some sort of affirmation. But that is not sexual attraction.

Interesting, though, that "if he was with a man he wouldn't have de-transitioned".

These euphemisms are interesting, because if we didn't know what, say, 'bottom' surgery' and 'chest feeding' refer to we would guess completely wrong.

'Bottom surgery' sounds as if it's something to do with the rear of the pelvic area, perhaps the anus, and 'chest feeding' something carnivorous animals might practise when they give their young pieces of lung tissue from their catch.