Stylist magazine deleted my comment on IG

[Mars27]

So, Stylist magazine posted on their Instagram a post earlier today with the "lovely" Charlie Craggs. It's a new weekly campaign from Strong Women UK (oh, the irony).

I can't copy and paste the post from my phone but then that's not really the point. I wrote a comment along the lines of "Hey Stylist, how about interviewing real women to talk about real women's problems such as endometriosis, domestic violence, discrimination at the workplace at the end of your maternity leave, etc?". I started getting abuse and obviously my comment was deleted. The abuse I was getting was from other women and I cannot understand for the life of me how some women cannot see that lived experience as man is different from a woman's, how insulting it is for that person to be taking the space from a female writer and so many issues stemming from that.

I know it's mostly like a generational divide and I feel so sorry for the women of tomorrow as they will be living in a truly horrible world (for them, obviously, as the patriarchy will reign supreme).

But its just doubling down on woman = uterus. If we do all agree that womanhood is not defined by reproductive system then why does someone who would prefer to appeal female cause such alarm to us? And if the ultimate goal is gender equality then why again do we condemn people based on the way they'd like to present themselves?

I understand the point repeatedly made that you don't think you can be a woman without having female genitalia - fine, if that is where you draw the line of womanhood you are entitled to that but what you are not entitled to is defining how others decide to draw a similar line, or condemn people if they feel more comfortable identifying as a female over a male. It poses much more of a risk to them than it goes to you - someone in these threads asked me to "prove" that transgender people in the UK are subject to violence. Transphonic hate crimes have doubled since 2019, and much of that research draws into online discourse fueling it, aka forums like this where people think they are defending feminism but for some reason are unable to do this without condemning another group (i.e doing the same thing that has historically been done to us). A teenager was recently murdered for being transgender - does no one see why this stuff matters? How much does it truly matter to you that someone is writing about their grief in a magazine?

But the ways real women are oppressed and the unique experiences we have are due to our biology.

A man who feels like a woman will never, ever experience life in the way women will.

Ever

www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/hate-crime-transgender-uk-figures-b2196759.html

Nobody is arguing women are 'just' their reproductive systems. Most of us are arguing that society needs to stop ignoring, belittling, diminishing and keeping us down for our reproductive systems. Society needs to protect, support and provide for us based on our reproductive systems.

Ignoring the differences between men and women, or saying women have nothing in common at all, not even biology, means society can't do the last part, the part women and girls need to happen to be able to fully participate in society.

What you are saying is the second part is not necessary and society should just ignore the differences in reproductive systems because some people with male reproductive systems want it to happen. Can't you see that this will have serious repercussions for female people as everything will then default back to what works for male people?

how does (a) reinforcing how important our uterus, and therefore our child bearing capacity is to our identity and (b) treating other people who identity as women as unequal and deluded - remotely help balance the scales?

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We have no duty to consider the feelings of men in our ongoing fight for equality. There are too many biological women all over the world still suffering oppression to be concerned with including men.

What actual tangible equalities do they not have that other people of their sex have?

Transpeople bring to the front issues XX have experienced for years. I only took 4 months maternity leave, I don't take time off for XX issues and I certainly don't let people identifying as male intimidate me. Yet I still face issues like if I was to apply for a job it wouldn't be unusual for a company to find a reason not to hire me as I might take further maternity leave (not going to happen) or need flexible working for childcare (only 2 years and he can sort himself out). To me this is a bigger issue than a bloke in a changing room or toilet.

With gender identity becoming fluid it will become harder and harder to discriminate based on gender as a characteristic. It will also cut costs for business and allow XX who don't want to be tied down by the "woman" banner to flourish.

Transwoman have pushed forward the gender neutral fight by decades which can only be seen as a win.

I understand what you are saying but I also think we society needs to stop ignoring, belittling, diminishing and keeping down those who find themselves stuck in a limbo, not feeling like they identity as male and experiencing serious mental health consequences being forced into that box. And there will be serious repercussions if we continue to pill onto people living through that. Do you not think there will be repercussions to saying someone writing about the death of their friend is not worthy of having that space? Or do the feelings of that person not matter?

The article states hate crime is on the rise overall, so not just for trans people.
Half the hate crimes (for all characteristics so also religion, age and race) is words and actions, so let's say half the rise of hate crime against trans people is words and actions. Does that include misgendering, demanding a male person leaves the womens facilities, saying a male person can't join a womens service?

40% is violence based overall (so for all characteristics). Lets say it is also the case for trans people. Who does the violence against them? Women or men? If men, then stop blaming women for violence done by men against male transwomen. Women demanding the right to boundaries are not responsible for actions done by men.

"Home Office report links rise in police-recorded transgender hate crimes to ‘discussions on social media’"

terfisaslur.com/

Good job women don't report all the abuse they receive on line to the police. And NO, just to clarify, I do not think on line abuse directed at anyone is acceptable but the bar for what constitutes transphobic is very low, saying you are a lesbian who only dates born women is transphobic, we used to call that sort of coercion corrective rape but it's progressive now.

So are women discriminated against or suffer sexual abuse based on their feminine thoughts?

Or the fact they're biologically female.

Equality isn't just about legal protection, which is why feminists are still arguing for female equality.

It's probably down to a provocative shade of lipstick.

Do you not think there will be repercussions to saying someone writing about the death of their friend is not worthy of having that space? Or do the feelings of that person not matter?

Not as a Strong Women UK. There are also mens magazines or general for both sexes magazines or in this magazine but then not as a strong women. That is the only objection we have. Strong Women is meant to provide role models for women, so centering a male person sends completely the wrong message

Transwoman have pushed forward the gender neutral fight by decades which can only be seen as a win.

How? It's all based on sexist stereotypes.

it's about broadening and idea of what a woman is and what she is capable of beyond just her reproductive system

If you include men in 'the idea of what a woman is' you are not broadening the idea, you are losing it.

The thought processes of some on this thread are completely centring male needs.

I fail to understand how that in any way benefits women.

Transwoman have pushed forward the gender neutral fight by decades which can only be seen as a win.

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 no. Fuck off

go on. Tell us how TW have enhanced the fight for women’s rights? What about the sex inequality women face in health care? What have TW done about that? What about the fact women still face discrimination in employment? What about the daft 1in 4 women experience domestic violence ? What have TW done about that?

How do you have pregnancy, periods, PCOS, FGM, endometriosis etc without a vagina/vulva? Not sure how it works without the genitalia being involved. A requirement, even.

it's about broadening and idea of what a woman is and what she is capable of beyond just her reproductive system

1. Feminists have been doing this for years. Breaking down the glass ceilings. Busting sex/gender stereotyping.

2.transgender women are broadening the idea of what a man is. And what they're capable of wearing.

Oh trust me, equality is never possible without legal protections. So by saying woman is someone of either sex, any legal protections for women are not worth the paper they are written on.

This is why saying transwomen are women is setting feminism back decades. It not just removes existing protections, it also make it impossible to fight for new protections because people of the female sex are no longer a separate group. So how do you fight sexism? 'it seems people with a uterus earn less than people with testicles' 'I was fired because my employer though I would use my uterus to get pregnant'- or something?

They are discriminated against on thoughts tho. It's that desire to raise a family, keep people happy, not win if it means an ugly fight that leads to discrimination of those who usually identify as woman. I don't know a single male half of a couple who has stayed home with a baby or went part time yet I know of multiple female half's. Interestingly the male:male couple we know through scouts both went back after 3 months shared adoption leave and make it work so they don't impact on anyone else.

Those who identify as male are less likely to want to stay home with newborn, don't largely care what people think and are more interested in getting results than keeping people happy.

Sexual assault is rare in this country and is used as a weapon in this kind of discussion. People who identify as male are just as likely if not more likely to suffer serious violence such as knife crime. If we are talking about crime knife crime, gangs and county lines are bigger threats to society than sex crime and largely effect those identifying as male.

What do you perceive your womanhood to be based on if not your biological reality? Curious to know what makes you a woman if not that?

I don't follow you point? Hate is hate I don't think it matters hugely that half of hate crimes overall recorded are words or behaviour that causes distresses, there's still the other half which is physical violence. None is acceptable. And I am not sure there is any data on the gender of who is committing those crimes, so its an assumption to rule out any women have been responsible for these crimes