Gendered hair, the struggle is real

[KatMcBundleFace]

Do we think that Metro is secretly gender critical? They keep publishing absolutely whingefests that really do not show the TQ in a good light at all.

Now of cause everyone should be able to have the hair cut they want..... it is just gender stereotypes after all. But I can't help laughing at the delicate ones crashing into the real world 👇

metro.co.uk/2023/01/15/going-to-the-barbers-as-an-lgbtq-person-means-hiding-my-identity-18080558/

Favourite bits:

"For me, short hair was what I’d longed for, and was symbolic of me becoming a man,’ he says.
Trans people make a lot of changes – both big and small – to feel a sense of trans joy. Hair, after all, is one of the first things people see.
But his first haircut when he came out was not just about choosing scissors or clippers – it was about feeling inner peace."

"Harry now goes to a mixed-gender hairdresser who treats his hair ‘gently and allows me to talk about my life, gender and my partner’."

Talking about your gender eh? Makes a change from "where are you going on your holibobs luv?". Let's ALL talk about our gender next time we are in the hairdressers... it'll go down so well! We all have inner peace after a good hair cut though, so I hear them on that.

Then we get to Eden, who works,
SHOCKINGLY in the charity sector and has a lot of pronouns. Confusingly all mixed up in the article.
"Eden, 27, who is transfeminine and works in the charity sector, says xe can’t use any old barbers as she has to out herself as trans."

Next we find out about the 😱 horror of having to book a "gents" cut when you're non binary.

Finally we get to David, who's had to be vague about their partners pronouns.
Because some women were once a bit mean when he was listening in on their conversations at the hairdressers .
😱😱😱

I'm going to hold all these people in my prayers.

@Thedaysthatremain I live in the South East too.😀 Have also lived in the North West and Glasgow and have found that hairdressers in general, once they have cut your hair a couple of times (or less) tend to talk and their love lives comes up . I don't ask! It doesn't bother me but I don't enquire about their sexuality. Barbers tend to be a bit more reserved but haven't hide who they are married to or whatever either. Sometimes when someone is chatting about a night out , a person can disclose what sex their partner is . It's not such a big deal these days. I get some people might prefer a silent haircut , so just say that. I don't believe that most experienced hairdressers /barbers can't use clippers. Maybe it is another issue?

Thought it was trans euphoria. Obviously this person is not doing it right.

Interesting to see them tripping over Eden's xe/ xem pronouns. Haven't seen that be pandered to in MSM this far.

Coincidentally read this this weekend: www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/news/liverpool-news/trans-man-turned-away-barbershops-25967656

It's not Chase's story that's a problem here but the mangling of language by the journo which really shouldn't have been allowed to stand:

"A transgender man said he spent his youth being refused short haircuts by hairdressers due to his perceived sex."

Perceived sex? There is no such thing!
I hope this is just idiocy and not the latest attempt to fudge reality.

Exhausting. Do these people ever watch the news?

Actually, I can sympathise with this a bit. I was growing out a number two buzz cut and went for an interim cut. The hair dresser totally butchered my hair and gave me a cut like a medieval monk. I told her the cut was hideous, and I would only pay her if she gave me a fresh number tell buzz cut. She completely refused, not on the basis that she hadn’t butchered my hair, but because she didn’t believe I wouldn’t complain more after the buzz cut.
This was many years ago though. I can’t really imagine baby hair dressers are like This now.

Sorry for horrible phone formatting!

I would have thought there'd more alphabet soup friendly barbers in Brighton and Hove of all places.

I am a gender non conforming woman, I have no problems getting my hair cut just how i want it, but then I have a good relationship with my hairdresser.

Maybe instead of whinging, people could build positive relationships. Just a thought.

And by whinging I mean GOING TO THE PRESS about your haircuts.....

I just can't 🤣

I hadn’t read the whole article and I now rescind any sympathy.

Maybe instead of whinging, people could build positive relationships.

Or just have personalities instead of umpteen hard-done-by special identities. Wild idea, I know.

I’ve just notice the xe/xem pronouns - which my phone doesn’t recognise.

One of them complains about the barbers being heteronormative. Basically saying they have to change to suit him? Why should they?

From the Metro article - "‘I went to a barber, nervous about whether they’d let me in or not, and I was surprised at how rough everything felt,’ Harry says. ‘It was head forward in a sink, quick clippers here and there, and little talking unless it was about the footy last week.’"
If that's what it takes to get the cheaper price, I'll pass. I used to take DS to a barbers, a spray of water and straight in, 15 minutes max in the chair. You get what you don't pay for, as it were!

I struggle to have sympathy, I admit. I have worn my hair in a variety of styles over the decades, everything from half way down my back to a half-inch all over (getting a particularly shit perm cut off ASAP). Feather-page, Purdey, mullet, a variation of the Princess Diana / George Michael that everyone wore in the 80s regardless of sex, asymmetric, something akin to Thomas Shelby twenty years before Peaky Blinders, you name it I've probably worn it. And don't get me started on the colours! At no point have I been made to feel 'wrong' for whatever haircut I was after, masculine or feminine.

I do think the polarisation of fashion right now is a bit restrictive, but it's only as restrictive as you buy in to. I find the notion of a gender-affirming haircut quite bizarre, given the variety I have had.

And like you OP, I have a good relationship with my current hairdresser. Having found her, I've followed her from salon to salon. She's skilled, that's what counts.

Total navel-gazing bollocks! If you’re looking for offence, you’ll find it everywhere. I live in the back of beyond and I’ve had no problems having long hair, shaved hair, punk hair over the years. My hairdresser cuts both men and women’s hair and yea, they have and use clippers!

The trouble is that most of these people are actually in thrall to gender stereotypes, despite pretending they’re not. Poor Harry there seems to be implying that they can only have short hair if they ‘become a man’. If they “longed for short hair”, wtaf didn’t they have it cut that way?

So sick of this self-indulgent ‘we’re the special people’ crap.

For sure. A good hairdresser / barber is worth keeping if you can!

"Pricing and styling can rely on gendered stereotypes: think a standard gent’s cut being a fair amount cheaper than a ladies’ cut.

This can be tricky for trans and non-binary clients..."

Not just a straightforward issue of women having to pay more and it therefore affecting women then? It's tricky for the T and the NB but has no implications for anyone else of course.

The article is verging on a piss take or satire. The levels of energy and effort outlined by the case studies, the careful variation of pronouns segueing to neo pronouns as we go through the article, the ramping up of the emotional language, "joy" the descriptions of the struggles....

I personally think it's been written by someone with an unclear agenda, maybe they're gender critical fluid...

I think it is pretending to be a woman but admitting that you are pretending , although still being outraged if someone else doesn’t want to pretend with you. It also means that you don’t have to have any possibly uncomfortable procedures or nasty pills.

It differs from the other trans sectors who are ‘actually women’ , and who are outraged if other people don’t recognise their truth.

or so I read, although that was two weeks ago so it might have moved on by now.

I can’t relate to these stories of hairdressers/barbers refusing to give women short cuts! I’ve had short hair my whole life, 50+ years. I’ve been to countless hairdressers all over the country and abroad, including barbers. I have never once been refused or had a hairdresser baulk at doing a short haircut, using clippers etc. I’m clearly female and not being mistaken for a man.

it’s just ridiculous that a woman says she can’t have a short haircut as a woman, but only as part of being trans. And, I suspect, disingenuous, as anyone can see short-haired women all over the place, on tv, etc etc including both butch and feminine women. It’s a bit like Elliot page saying how great it was to be able to wear a suit upon becoming a man. Having been pictured in numerous suits. Just nonsensical claptrap to try to pretend being a man or a woman is based on what stereotypes you adhere to.

Aw yes but is the hair cut gender ambiguous enough to express her nonbinary identify? It needs to be very specifically male and female expressiveness to confuse others and also make them say "Aaaawww! You are both male and female!" While they soon and romantisize the combo. Kind of like chocolate vanilla swirl ice cream.

Clearly a mullet is what they should have chosen! 😃

🙄

Oh yeah, you got me, clearly I am lying about ever having difficulties getting my hair cut the way I want it.

Surely everyone in the world has difficulties getting their hair cut the way they'd want it! Or is it just me who is miserable after a trip to the hairdressers..?

Oh yeah, you got me, clearly I am lying about ever having difficulties getting my hair cut the way I want it.

it’s often hard to get it cut exactly how you want it, but I don’t think it’s hard to find so one to cut a woman’s hair short.

Why does it matter if some barbers won't cut women's hair? Just go to one that does, doesn't need to be lgbt anything. I have my hair cut at the barbers as a woman, I go back to the first one I went to as they have never had a problem with it.

Do you have to get behind the wheel and drive there though? That's what makes this newsworthy...because people going out of their way to return to a salon they've clicked with is a sign of something apparently...