Transwoman in the changing room at school pool

[PoolFloat]

My mum goes to aqua aerobics classes at a sports club in a private school. Recently, a transwoman has joined the class. My mum was told that they use a different changing room to the one next to the pool but today they came out of the pool and put their swimming hat into a locker before returning to the pool to join the class (there is adult free swim beforehand).

The club has a safeguarding policy which states they will: prioritise the safety and well-being of children and adults at risk

I'm not sure if my mum is considered at risk? She is 88 and nearly all the women in the class are in their 70s and 80s.

The changing room has a communal area with only four cubicles so most women get changed in the communal area. Now they are reluctant to do so.

My mum has asked me to help her draft a letter from the women in the class saying how uncomfortable they are that this person is in their changing room but doesn't know how to word it.

Can anyone help please?

So sorry your mum is going through this OP and, quite aside from the risks of assault (which are serious), why on earth should these women be expected to strip for a male stranger? This is appalling

I'm not getting why he even had a locker in the female changing room? He'd hardly have two lockers.

So the Op's speculation that he had probably reverted to the changing room he'd been asked to vacate sounds plausible.

Read the thread @Beebeebaby your poorly constructed arguments have already been asked and answered.

And some gerontophobia thrown in for good measure. And we are described as the bigots???

I would think. How many men do you see in women's changing rooms wearing swimsuits?

No woman should have to share a changing space with a male @Beebeebaby no matter how they identify. It's a question of privacy and dignity.

I am finding it hard to contain my anger over this whole subject.
I have been watching a series of videos on youtube by Matt Walsh. "What is a woman"

So many people people who have drunk the Kool Aid- unable or unwiling to define the word woman- a trasgender surgeon, University tutor who teaches gender issues.
What is going on?
Is the idea that I am a woman now simply a belief?

it does not make her a paedophile or sex offender so why is it a safeguarding issue ?

None of the other male gym members are necessarily pardophiles etc but because of safeguarding they are excluded from the female changing room, this particular male person is no different from them.

Could you explain what the benefit is, if any, to the OP's mother, if the changing room becomes mixed sex?

But a setting has been designed for such women - a women’s changing room. And a male person has entered that.

do you it realise if a new “changing room for females of sexual abuse only” changing room was set up a male person could/probably would enter that as well.

She doesn’t have to be personally afraid of anything. She could just have a perfectly legitimate desire to not be seen naked by a male person without her consent. She could just have a perfectly legitimate desire to not risk seeing a penis which she doesn’t want to see.

My mother isn't ignorant. She doesn't want to get changed with a male bodied person in the room and neither do any of her friends.

There is something very disturbing about people who object to women having healthy boundaries. However old they are.

Such behaviour puts all women at risk. It doesn’t need to be the trans person who is the risk.

i’ve spoken about this before but 30 plus years ago a school friend of mine was badly raped in the women’s toilets at a national trust property. She was about 10yo, she needed surgery fterwards her injuries was so bad. The man (not a trans person) had sneaked into the toilets and lurked in a cubicle until someone was there by themselves. If someone had seen him he would have been told to get out. These days such a man could walk in openly and would not be challenged.

the more male people in female areas is normalised the more risk there is for all.

about 20 years ago I was assaulted in the jacuzzi at a gym. Nobody else was in the pool area at the time which was unusual but there were people in the sauna which faced the pool and he realised that and backed down. However the women’s changing rooms were often deserted in the late evening and again if male people back then had been more acceptable in women’s changing rooms I’d have no doubt he was the sort of person to prowl about in such a space looking to attack women.

if challenged he could just say he was trans. 🤷‍♀️

Tip:
Always check for ageism before accusing others of ignorance or bigotry.
You're welcome.

There is something very disturbing about people who object to women having healthy boundaries. However old they are.

Yes. I doubt you'll get any sensible discourse either. Sometimes, just being able to diss women on the feminist section of a predominantly female site, is fulfilling enough.

I’ll be honest, I feel sorry for them too.

are the changing rooms individual little cubicals? If so I don’t see the issue.

@Dreamwhisper that's a great example of using language to mislead by deception.

customer service as in accommodating her the OPs mother's needs and wishes for a female single sex space even if their wider the pool's changing room policy is that they the changing room policy don't by default exclude transgendered people males with their corresponding single mixed sex space (that matches their gender identity)

Or are you claiming that a human correctly classified into the male reproductive classification should be described as a human female?

It sounds like the sorting set up you get in a private gym.

A large space which is used as a communal changing room, with a few cubicles at either end, but not enough for everyone to use.

Can I ask you the same question? What is the benefit to the OP's mum and her friends of allowing males into the changing room?

are the changing rooms individual little cubicals? If so I don’t see the issue.

So why can't this male customer use the individual little cubicles in the male changing room then?

I only know my gym and pool changing rooms and showers are all in the same space. But all behind individual cubicals/small locked rooms.

I’m not saying they shouldn’t.

im just trying to make sense to what the set it and situation is at the pool.

clearly the pool are aware of what’s going on and need to address the situation for everyone.

I swim a lot and sometimes cross paths with the water aerobics people who are mostly as you describe (elderly women). Our changing rooms are unisex which works fine most of the time. I think the trick to it working fine is to have staff walking about and to have lockable cubicles.

You mentioned the women using the communal part to get changed. Could they use individual cubicles?

I think it would be problematic for a transwoman to use male changing room as their safety would be under threat. The pool really needs to provide a solution so that the transwoman and your mum feel safe.

I use the Acquatics Centre in London and all the changing rooms are mixed.

You get into a private cubicle to change of course, but but there are no separate changing rooms for men and women, anyone can wander around and pick whatever locker they wish to use.

The space is also cleaned by male and female cleaners.

They have put separate shower spaces though.

There have never been any issues.

Frankly I am sick and tired of all these thread where people are ganging up on transgender women and suggesting they pause a threat just by existing...

It really saddens me and makes me ashamed of that brand of feminism.

I have no idea why you think that someone who just wants to enjoy a swim would primarily be there to assault women just because she happens to be trans. To me that is absolutely shocking.