I'm afraid that's my point.
You never will understand it. She doesn't understand it. Nobody understands it. As painfully evidenced in AB's court case.
But women have spent years patiently working on trying to in the belief that it must somehow make sense if they try hard enough and listen carefully enough, and while we've spent that time and energy in the belief we're dealing with equal good faith and just haven't yet tried hard enough to get it or explain enough how this destroys women's rights and why that matters?
Women's rights have been shoved further down the drain. Because it's largely a lot of distracting noise to cover the real actions.
Not by any means criticising you, but this is one of the biggest weaknesses women who want to retain their rights have: this careful attempt to be reasonable is never going to be reciprocated, it's just going to be taken as a sign of weakness, and taken full advantage of.