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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

Banned from another breastfeeding support group

97 replies

veronicagoldberg · 07/04/2022 14:51

I'm absolutely furious.

I have put so much time and effort into helping other women, giving advice, offering support on the Breastfeeding Oldet Babies FB group, only to be banned for politely asking not to be referred to as a "chest feeder".

It was one of my favourite Facebook groups. And now, I can't even access the page. I'm incandescent.

I agreed to their rules when I joined, which was that terms like "chest feeders" might be used if a transman posted (guess what - no transman ever posted in the 2 years I was a member...) However, I took exception to a post that referred to all group members thus.

I've written an opinion piece about it, and am wondering where to send it.

Banned from another breastfeeding support group
OP posts:
Thelnebriati · 07/04/2022 14:59

Start by posting it on your page, and add that they are discriminating against you based on several characteristics that are protected by The Equality Act.
Facebook arent responsible for the group but they are the host, so should have a way for you to flag that. Is there anything in their Help pages?

Thissucksmonkeynuts · 07/04/2022 15:03

Awful group that one, I got banned for being homophobic/transphobic and all the rest because I said that the best thing for a baby was being breastfed by the woman who gave birth to it.
It's a very strange mix of women , some who are deeply woke and some who are deeply Christian and belive their husband's should have sex on tap. And then there's the ones who dope their toddlers with melatonin so they don't have to wake up at night.

WhiteFire · 07/04/2022 15:08

I am sorry to learn that they too have gone down that rabbit hole. Mind I left many years ago after a poster was awful to me about babies and toddlers who thumbed sucked, my 1st and 2nd both thumb sucked and she basically said that if a child thumb sucked it meant that the parent neglected them.

For a group of women who are supposedly so in tune with their body to carry on like this is mind boggling, however this is also no denying that there is a certain right on type person who ends up in these parenting circles.

Obviously not all of us / them are like that but they do make up a vocal section of the groups.

OliviaBond · 07/04/2022 15:10

Men have breasts, I don't understand the logic behind chest feeder even being needed

Original poster
veronicagoldberg · 07/04/2022 15:12

@OliviaBond

Men have breasts, I don't understand the logic behind chest feeder even being needed

It's anatomically incorrect too. There's a huge difference between chest pain and breast pain, for example. Show up at A&E complaining of chest pain, and you'll be seen a damn sight faster.

OP posts:
MayMorris · 07/04/2022 15:43

@OliviaBond

Men have breasts, I don't understand the logic behind chest feeder even being needed
Men do not have the anatomical structure of breasts women do. E.g. milk glands So they have muscle and subcutaneous fat- a chest in other words

Actually if you’ve never seen a picture of the inside of a breast vs chest it is amazing…I’m late 50s and never saw it till a few years ago. All the pictures you see of anotomical”chests” are male…there a bit of a push on that medical text books (of all things) must show both 🤦‍♀️😱

Here’s a picture…they almost look like flowers- ish!
focusedcollection.com/200634896/stock-photo-female-chest-breast-anatomy-black.html

IamSarah · 07/04/2022 15:45

Wow that's outrageous.

I think the Critic would be interested in your opinion piece. If you DM me I'll send you the editor's details.

nepeta · 07/04/2022 15:47

Breasts are something both men and women have. To demand that the word 'breasts' be changed in meaning into something that only applies to the female body is weirdly sexist, but it is also another example of the way the rights the transgender movement demand certainly include to redefine all words we use.

So what would breast cancer now be? Chest cancer? These changes are irresponsible. They require reality to bend over backwards to be inclusive to the suffering of only one group of individuals. What about people with OCD? There are loads of triggering words and discussions which might trigger them, and they should clearly be allowed to specify which alternatives are better for them.

WelcomeMarch · 07/04/2022 15:48

But they're a breastfeeding group. They're even called that. What on earth is their problem?

DomesticatedZombie · 07/04/2022 16:06

That is appalling, OP.

DomesticatedZombie · 07/04/2022 16:06

@WelcomeMarch

But they're a breastfeeding group. They're even called that. What on earth is their problem?
Shock
Hutchy16 · 07/04/2022 16:19

I’m not sure you are giving us the full details. I can’t believe you would be banned for politely asking not to be called a chest feeder, because it is absolutely your right to be called a breast feeder. I think that it probably escalated far beyond this…

WTF475878237NC · 07/04/2022 16:22

Hutchy16

You haven't been peaked yet I take it?!

Thewheelsfalloffthebus · 07/04/2022 16:25

Men have milk ducts too. What do you think nipples are?

Thewheelsfalloffthebus · 07/04/2022 16:28

Sorry, just to clarify. When I said men I meant people of male sex. All mammals of both sexes have milk ducts.

Stellaris22 · 07/04/2022 16:33

If you agreed to the rules of the group, then failed to follow said rules, then it seems logical to get the response you did. It must have been a repeated failure to follow the rules you agreed to.

Furx · 07/04/2022 16:35

hutchy yep, that’s what we all thought too….

…. Until we didn’t

WarriorN · 07/04/2022 16:43

If you've been thrown out you can report them pdq.

They then get on a watch list.

I'm in the group so could spend some time reporting issues

3WildOnes · 07/04/2022 16:44

That breast feeding group is particularly bonkers anyway. Woman are always discouraged from weaning and night weaning. Most group members seem to think toddlers will come to psychological harm from being denied unlimited access to the breast. So I’m not surprised to hear this.

Blogblogblogblog · 07/04/2022 16:46

Chest feeders reminds me of the Catholic story of the pelican who tore into her own chest and fed her chicks on her blood so they wouldn’t starve. It’s about great self sacrifice. The other legend it that the mother kills her chicks, but on the third days pecks into her chest and drips blood on the dead chicks to resurrect them. I can’t find the rather gruesome painting we had on the school wall. Here’s one less gruesome chest feeding picture:

Banned from another breastfeeding support group
Banned from another breastfeeding support group
Blogblogblogblog · 07/04/2022 16:47

…..Or two! I think it came out twice Grin

DomesticatedZombie · 07/04/2022 16:48

@Hutchy16

I’m not sure you are giving us the full details. I can’t believe you would be banned for politely asking not to be called a chest feeder, because it is absolutely your right to be called a breast feeder. I think that it probably escalated far beyond this…
'That didn't happen. And if it did, you deserved it.'
Pawtriarchal · 07/04/2022 16:48

@OliviaBond

Men have breasts, I don't understand the logic behind chest feeder even being needed
Because without the distinction they wouldn’t be able to virtue signal.
Iwonder08 · 07/04/2022 16:58

Why did you decide that a breastfeeding support group is the right place for the trans argument?

WhiteFire · 07/04/2022 17:09

@Iwonder08

Why did you decide that a breastfeeding support group is the right place for the trans argument?
How did we get to the place that asking in the "Breastfeeding Older Babies and Beyond" group not to personally be referred to as a "chestfeeder" is starting a trans argument?

I had major nursing aversion, being referred to as a chestfeeder would not have been helpful.