M&S frets about customers' feelings re Mother's Day

[Abitofalark]

Amanda Platell writes that M&S asked shoppers if they'd prefer not to be reminded of Mother's Day:

"M&S seems to be tying it itself in PC knots by fretting over the feelings of women unable to have children — or is it attempting to placate those in the trans lobby for whom ‘mother’ may be an offensive word?

Whatever, the email we loyal shoppers received asking us if we’d prefer not to be reminded of Mother’s Day was absurd — not least because it managed to remind us of Mother’s Day anyway."

I assumed it was aimed at people who had lost their mothers and didn't want constant reminders in the run up to the day. I know that the first Mothers Day after I lost my mum was really difficult. The mails don't bother me now, but they would have done at one time. Amanda Platell is being ridiculous.

I appreciate these thoughtful gestures to try to limit upset for mothers who have lost children or vice versa. I find it distasteful that you are attempting to make this a trans issue.

@LizDoingTheCanCan

Most retailers do this.

Imagine how obsessed you'd have to be to try and relate everything to trans women.

A lot of online shops have done with in the last couple of years. I wonder if they starting doing it when covid first struck and so many mothers and fathers were dying before their time?

@NuffSaidSam

I think that's mainly to avoid upsetting people who are grieving their mothers. They do the same for father's Day.

Exactly.

I received this email. I'm ok with Mother'a Day now I am a mum. But it's been the worst day of the year for me for 16 years, since I lost my own mum as a teenager. So I appreciated this email a lot.

I lost my mother 4 years ago and my eldest son last year and though I have another child mothers day is a day best avoided to me. I appreciate the gesture from companies - for some of us ita a hard,hard day.

I was curious about Platell.

Her Wikipedia page says ‘She has lamented that for medical reasons she has been unable to have children’.

I find her tweet (?) disingenuous at best now. Or perhaps dashed off in an ill advised moment.

My friend works in PR and marketing - it's definately for the bereaved and lots of companies including not on the high street and thortful do it on mother/fathers day and valentines day.

Maybe it would be simpler if they didn't 'market' Mothers Day at all. It's not supposed to be a money making opportunity for shops. (Yeah, I know, that boat has sailed long ago)

@LizDoingTheCanCan

Most retailers do this.

Imagine how obsessed you'd have to be to try and relate everything to trans women.

Well, quite

Like other pp's, I've seen these emails for the last couple of years both before Mother's Day and also a few weeks before Father's Day. I've always assumed they are aimed at those who are dealing with a recent bereavement when they would still be feeling very raw. As for those who 'don't open random marketing e mails', , mist of the ones I see have Mother's Day or Father's Day in the subject line, so you don't need to open it to know what it is about.
It is many years now since dh and I lost our fathers, but I do remember how that first year was so hard seeing the special displays of stuff in shops, I am sure I would have found it very hard to have a stream of emails reminding me of it as well.

This just makes her look a bit obsessed - it’s really not to do with trans women.

For goodness sake, why would anyone be upset because the caught a glimpse of a Mothers day card ? My Mum died when i was young, i don't go to pieces on Mothers day, i don't think nobody else should celebrate it because my Mum is dead. Death is part of life and yes of course there are times even years later that grief stabs your heart but sending out emails asking if you want to opt out of a day is just down right ridiculous.

I’m struggling with infertility and have had quite a few losses, I’m hugely grateful to be given the chance to opt out of mother’s day. My own mother is not an easy relationship either. So it’s a day of sadness for me. This isn’t about TRAs thankfully.

@LowlandLucky how compassionate of you

My mum died on Valentine’s Day some years ago and I found being surrounded by all the paraphernalia in those first couple of years really difficult. I remember having to buy stamps to deal with probate stuff and they were fucking mothers days stamps! I would have appreciated that opt out at the time.

How is sending out one email 'tying themselves in knots'? And I've always thought it was completely obvious that this is aimed at being a (very small and unobtrusive) courtesy for the bereaved.

Genuinely don't understand why anyone would want to get marketing emails from anyone, about anything, ever. It's so intrusive.

I had an email from funky pigeon where you could opt out of Mothers day emails. I really think you are misunderstanding the sentiment OP and not everything is trans related nobody is trying to eradicate mothers they are trying to maybe save people a little bit of hurt on what can be a difficult day.

I've just always assumed it's aimed at bereaved mothers and those of us that have lost our own mothers.

You seem to be the one tying yourself in knots!
Sorry the GC brigade didn't agree with your assumption I guess you were hoping for a different reaction.

@LowlandLucky

For goodness sake, why would anyone be upset because the caught a glimpse of a Mothers day card ? My Mum died when i was young, i don't go to pieces on Mothers day, i don't think nobody else should celebrate it because my Mum is dead. Death is part of life and yes of course there are times even years later that grief stabs your heart but sending out emails asking if you want to opt out of a day is just down right ridiculous.

Do you think losing your mother at a young age has impacted your ability to empathise?

PhrenologlistsFinger Yes i am compassionate but surely by the time you are an adult you can ignore Mothers/Fathers/Grandparents day. Death is part of life and we all have to suffer it. Not having my Mum, Grandparents or my 2 babies that didn't make it hurts but i can't expect the world to stop for me.

@LowlandLucky Why do you care if some people want to opt out of specific marketing like this? It’s not going to affect you in any way is it?

Although I’m a mother my own died 3 days before daughter born and MIL 3 months after son was born. I don’t take it to heart ❤️ and hit the delete button simples.