Sabina Nessa: The Deafening Silence

[Jaysmith71]

Just a local London story. Far less interest than Sarah Everard, also in London. Far less interest than Gabby Petito thousands of miles away.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-58639602

Now whatever is it about Sabina Nesser that provokes this apathy???

@Jaysmith71

Just a local London story. Far less interest than Sarah Everard, also in London. Far less interest than Gabby Petito thousands of miles away.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-58639602

Now whatever is it about Sabina Nesser that provokes this apathy???

This has to be bait. I’ve had relatives from abroad ask me about it. It’s a major story, but sorry that’s not fitting with your priors

But I have seen this in the media for a while now - she caught my eye because she really looks very much like my SIL. Maybe we just ‘don’t see’ another poor woman’s face in the press.

The story is all over the media & has been for a few days now. Not sure what the purpose of this thread was?

Focus on the part of society who is (mostly) doing this - men. White men, Asian men, black men, Eastern European men...

Well those social media warriors are very irresponsible then.

What if their actions effected the case?

What if it's deliberately being kept quiet because very young children are a factor in this case and don't need to know the details?

Fair enough if it was her family and friends raising awareness, but most likely it's people who want to virtue signal.

I first saw it on FR24 on 20 September....so doubt that was due to social media posts.

I have been following it since it was first reported on Sunday or Monday, I am not in the UK.

www.euronews.com/2021/09/23/sabina-nessa-police-make-appeal-following-teacher-s-murder-in-london

The media are certainly fickle and shallow and definitely favour an 'attractive' victim.

Gabby Petito was an Instagrammer who left behind a lot of media ready content which must have influenced the level of coverage her case has received.

It's interesting that she and her alleged killer reportedly both had documented mental health issues but not much has been said about his beyond that.....

Yes we need more focus and resourcing by the media and the police on the daily violence against women and the causes of it.

But equally it isn't realistic to expect all murders of women and all domestic abuse cases to be given equal and wall-to-wall media coverage. Sadly, there are just too many and that's the main issue.

And while more way more women are killed by men than are killed by other women, men are still much more likely to be victims of murder as well as the perpetrators of it.

A vigil for Sabina Nessa has been organised and will hopefully be well attended.

I've seen more than one person on my social media sharing a post to the effect of 'why is the media not covering the Sabina Nessa murder?' along with a link to a BBC or similar article about it, which is a bit confusing.

Instead of the huge focus on female vulnerability I wish there was more focus on the cause of ALL murders (including murders of men who are also killed in large numbers every year with less comment).

It is male violence.

@Briset

Yes, you're right it is (90%+) Male violence.

And yes, as a penis owner, I am slightly ashamed to admit that.

This thread, along with the lady on Radio 4 this morning was talking about the lower priority of Bangladeshi women (As well as other minorities).

Suddenly, the problem is no longer a problem of violence against women and girls, but against a sub-set of women and girls.

So, going the other way, violence against women and girls is a subset of violence against human beings.

Just for the avoidance of doubt, and to reiterate:

Yes, I know the problem is male violence.

Unfortunately, some men are violent. Whether that's nature or nurture, someone a lot more qualified than me will have to comment.

I also wonder if domestic violence towards women is only so rife because heterosexual couples are the vast majority and the woman just happens to be there.

I certainly suspect that if it were a gay couple, the "Alpha" male would be beating the shit out of the "Beta" male for exactly the same reasons.

I'd certainly be interested in the proportion of domestic violence within gay couples vs heterosexual couples.

Unfortunately some people (The minority) are arseholes by nature. I used to work with a guy where the standing joke was "He could start an argument in an empty room." He didn't care who his target was, they were just a target to him.

Nobody deserves to be murdered or raped, or attacked just for going to the pub, and yes, it's usually a bloke that does it.

I can't help but thinking that people (men) need to turn away from violence full stop. How do we achieve this?

I suspect the fact that typical manly activities involve large amounts of testosterone and competition. Does this encourage violent tenancies?

Do we stop glorifying war and violence in films & TV?

Do we chemically limit testosterone?

I genuinely don't know....

Yes, I agree it's a tragic thing that happened, along with that poor family, but I think tackling the problem of male violence against women specifically, is trying to solve the problem in the middle, not the root cause.

And again, I can hear the calls of "Whataboutery" (I love that word)

Yes, I know and agree the problem is male violence.

Ps. I do apologise for the huge block of text, for some reason the paragraphs didn't separate!

I don't agree that it's local news. We live live in a very rural area, and I know about it and so do others. We are shocked and disgusted.

It coukd be racism, but I think part of it is horror fatigue. The deaths of women are so incredibly commonplace it seems the vigils and national outcries make zero difference in the end :(

This was also the week where a (reportedly pregnant) mother, two of her children and a friend of one of the children were murdered in their home. I know it’s not ‘trumps’ in horror but this story was particularly horrifying.

I'd certainly be interested in the proportion of domestic violence within gay couples vs heterosexual couples.

Statistics for domestic violence and intimate partner violence are readily available for people who are interested. E.g.,

www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/crimeandjustice/bulletins/domesticabuseinenglandandwales/yearendingmarch2018

I am absolutely disgusted by the BBC reporter interviewing little children outside the school. Just why? It made me feel so uncomfortable, for them and for Sabina's family and friends.

@endofagain

I am absolutely disgusted by the BBC reporter interviewing little children outside the school. Just why? It made me feel so uncomfortable, for them and for Sabina's family and friends.

That is awful. It's really hard to deal with death in schools with young children. It needs to be handled really sensitivity.

Why are they interviewing children?

That's really shocking.

In saying that, my dds friend lost w imm3adiate family in a house fire. She happened to be staying out for the night. Journalists turned up trying to interview people outside the school, not sure why I am shocked.

But didn't imagine they would have done it with primary school children.

Though I would presume their parents consented.

There have been 96 murders in London so far this year. Hardly any make it past local news. I've jusr been through the list of names. I only recognise Sarah Everard and Sabina Nessa.

Paul Maurice anybody...?
Doesn't matter.

@AICM

There have been 96 murders in London so far this year. Hardly any make it past local news. I've jusr been through the list of names. I only recognise Sarah Everard and Sabina Nessa.

Paul Maurice anybody...?
Doesn't matter.

You mean this case?

news.sky.com/story/paul-maurice-death-sean-maurice-appears-at-old-bailey-accused-of-killing-his-dad-12412943

Where a son killed his father in their house? I'm not saying it's not terribly sad but it is very different to somebody just walking in public and being randomly killed and their body dumped. Being randomly attacked whilst minding your business strikes a bit more fear in young women!

They are not even comparable!

Don't know why there's so many threads seeing it's being ignored, it's all over the national news inc TV yesterday

Like I said... doesn't matter.

Agree with PP and would go further than saying the focus needs to be on our system actually treating VAWG of all severity properly as going straight to the most extreme crimes is very unusual.

Catching these men and dealing with them with an eye to protection of public, if they are repeat/ escalating etc. This would prevent plenty of DV and sex offenders before they had loads of victims/ did something horrendous.

The current approach from society esp with serious attacks on women is to express shock sadness horror etc. Which all need to be expressed.

But where is the anger? Where is the disgust at the massive failure of our authorities when it comes to the full range of crimes that are predominantly committed against women and girls? Why aren't we shouting? I mean I include myself in this.

And why is this seen as a women's issue rather than an issue for the whole of society?

We've been making noise about VAWG for decades. And some things have happened eg DV not under the carpet any more, nor CSA. (Although the handling of it is all too often shit). Marital rape criminalised early 90s. Sexual harrassment not just seen as banter as often.

But how can things actually be improved? I mean yes there's a lot of talking discussion more awareness. But dealing with it effectively is still really poor.

@NiceGerbil

Agree with PP and would go further than saying the focus needs to be on our system actually treating VAWG of all severity properly as going straight to the most extreme crimes is very unusual.

Catching these men and dealing with them with an eye to protection of public, if they are repeat/ escalating etc. This would prevent plenty of DV and sex offenders before they had loads of victims/ did something horrendous.

The current approach from society esp with serious attacks on women is to express shock sadness horror etc. Which all need to be expressed.

But where is the anger? Where is the disgust at the massive failure of our authorities when it comes to the full range of crimes that are predominantly committed against women and girls? Why aren't we shouting? I mean I include myself in this.

And why is this seen as a women's issue rather than an issue for the whole of society?

We've been making noise about VAWG for decades. And some things have happened eg DV not under the carpet any more, nor CSA. (Although the handling of it is all too often shit). Marital rape criminalised early 90s. Sexual harrassment not just seen as banter as often.

But how can things actually be improved? I mean yes there's a lot of talking discussion more awareness. But dealing with it effectively is still really poor.

Yes and I would also include flashing, stalking etc as crimes to be treated much more seriously than they currently are.

To me these can be precursors to more serious crimes and those individuals should be punished more harshly and monitored closely.

@PlanDeRaccordement

Doing some searches and it is also being reported on in the US by Sky, CNN, Washington Post, Fox News

But why would the story be reported in the US at all?

@AICM

There have been 96 murders in London so far this year. Hardly any make it past local news. I've jusr been through the list of names. I only recognise Sarah Everard and Sabina Nessa.

Paul Maurice anybody...?
Doesn't matter.

In both Sabina Nessa and Sarah Everard cases there was a murderer at large on the streets until they were caught, the urgency in the widespread reporting of that is quite different to a murder that happen within a home and the killer is immediately caught.

But I'm surprised that how the news works needs to be explained to adults