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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Is this a man or a woman?

364 replies

GreatBigBird · 13/07/2021 23:21

YABU: woman

YANBU: man

www.cp24.com/news/woman-charged-after-allegedly-sexually-assaulting-boy-6-in-toronto-park-1.5507641

I can’t even begin to express myself.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
Whatwouldscullydo · 14/07/2021 08:15
Angry

Criminals you don't expect better from. Law enforcement are supposed to be the good guys. They aren't supposed to further abuse the victims.

GreatBigBird · 14/07/2021 08:19

I’ve sent this message through the report function:

“I want to clarify that 'move the thread' wasn’t a request, but a resigned acknowledgement of what was probably going to happen (and better than it being deleted). I put the thread in AIBU purely for the voting function and now I no longer have that. Can the thread please be moved back to AIBU? Thanks.”

OP posts:
TalkingOutYerArse · 14/07/2021 08:22

[quote Justa47]@GreatBigBird

Disgraceful act but also is your drama around some one clearly trying to take advantage of a system.

Sick people everywhere does not mean trans people are bad.[/quote]
That's not what is being highlighted and you know it.

Clymene · 14/07/2021 08:23

@Sophoclesthefox

That’s a man, baby.

Of course it’s been shuttled off to the naughty step, you can’t expect The Monitors to have to comb through thousands of threads over the whole site to find their proof that MN is mystifyingly obsessed with trans issues! Be reasonable! Get them in here so they’re nicely contained, it’s not nice to try to alert women that these days we assume positive intent from burly sexual predators, who would never try to deceive people.

It Never Happens.

Mumsnet - making parents' lives easier. Except we're not allowed to to talk about sexual predators around our children because ...

It might make their lives more difficult? Confused

I mean who exactly is being protected here and why?

RufustheBadgeringReindeer · 14/07/2021 08:24

@ErrolTheDragon

A correctly defined AIBU with clear choices and voting turned on should stay put, I’d have thought.
Youd think wouldn’t you

But only if it is on one ‘side’ of the discussion

Its fucking infuriating….and then to be told it doesn’t happen by MNHQ!

SnoopyLights · 14/07/2021 08:24

@Warmduscher

Presumably the child told the police he was assaulted by a man, so how come this person was arrested and charged if this person is a woman? That’s some serious misgendering by the Canadian police force.
It's not just happening in Canada. This is a recent news report from the UK. Four women were attacked, all of them identifying a man as their attacker, but police arrested a woman who was originally mistaken for a man.

Three more women were violently attacked in East Dulwich over the weekend after police failed to respond to a 999 call from a woman who was strangled in the street in front of her child.

As the News reported earlier today, a woman was left waiting for a response car that never arrived last Friday night after calling 999 four times.

She said she had been approached and strangled by a stranger in front of her ten-year-old son shortly before 9pm.

She reported that the unknown man had attacked her out of the blue on Wood Vale and tried to smash her head against a wall while her distraught child ran to try and find help.

Speaking to the News she described her fear that her attacker not only remained at large but could go on to attack other women, saying strangulation in particular is a ‘red flag’ for further, escalating violence. Her attacker was seen remaining in the same area for some time after, but a promised police car never arrived.

Police have now admitted they were unable to race to the scene after dealing with a series of emergencies across the city the same night. The victim, who asked to remain anonymous, was eventually told officers would visit three days later, on Monday this week.

While praising individual officers for their support she criticised their inability to attend on the night and, in particular, she was afraid the attacker would go on to hurt others.

She told this newspaper: “I called four times that night as no one turned up. Eventually it got to 1.30am and I hadn’t been able to go to sleep.

“I was so tired and they said that someone would come round to my house on Monday.

“The police could have found him straight away but now there’s not much they can do.”

Sadly, her worst fear has been realised. Over the weekend reports have circulated that three other women were targeted in exactly the same location, including a knife attack.

The victim’s injuries were, fortunately, not life-threatening but there is no update on the seriousness of her condition. Two other women were also threatened with knives in the same three day period.

Today (June 15) a 53-year-old woman was arrested on suspicion of grievous bodily harm with intent and remains in custody while enquiries continue.

Police say they believe she is the only suspect, and had initially been mistaken for a man.

This week the Met launched a new scheme to help reassure women in the aftermath of the kidnap and murder of Sarah Everard.

Officers from Southwark and Lambeth are holding ‘walk and talk’ events for women to highlight safety concerns and help identify areas which can benefit from more targeted patrols.

The Met will now have to answer tough questions about whether this is enough if 999 calls go unanswered – and why this suspect was able to go on and commit a string of further horrific offences.

TalkingOutYerArse · 14/07/2021 08:24

@RainbowMum11

Does it really matter - a child was assaulted and that isn't ok irrespective of the perpetrator
Yes it matters. This man is claiming womanhood. Is this child going to be made to say 'that woman assaulted me' and lie in court if it goes that far??
DaisiesandButtercups · 14/07/2021 08:25

I hope that MNHQ grants your request to be moved back to AIBU GreatBigBird.

As you say the poll is important and more will vote than will comment. Clearly it was getting a lot of interest considering it was only started late last night.

RufustheBadgeringReindeer · 14/07/2021 08:25

And male obviously

AlfonsoTheMango · 14/07/2021 08:25

YANBU.

DaisiesandButtercups · 14/07/2021 08:27

And yes obviously YANBU!

GreatBigBird · 14/07/2021 08:31

Wow @SnoopyLights that’s scary.What a joke. How have we got to this?

OP posts:
Gumbomambo · 14/07/2021 08:34

Yanbu. Disgraceful. It matters. Poor child and to be told that it was actually a woman that assaulted them? Jesus fucking Christ. A massive bloke like woman with a female penis.

Holly60 · 14/07/2021 08:40

@Iggii

How confusing for the children assaulted to be told it was a woman who did this to them Sad
The thing is, they will be told it was a transwoman. Because it is. Children are not thick and can understand nuance …
Feelingoktoday · 14/07/2021 08:43

Of course it matters this the sex of the criminal is reported on. If the stats become screwed because sexual offenders identify as women we will end up moving from 98% of sexual offences being committed by men to 50% being committed by women - if not more. Then what - reduce police resources, change child protection guidelines, etc etc. Women’s natural gut feelings of who is safe and who isn’t will be ignored. We will be told that of course women commit these crimes in the same ratio as men.

littlbrowndog · 14/07/2021 08:44

In the report it don’t say he was a transwoman

It says he was a woman ☹️

MidsomerMurmurs · 14/07/2021 08:45

@Justa47
Disgraceful act but also is your drama around some one clearly trying to take advantage of a system

Sick people everywhere does not mean trans people are bad

How on earth is this someone “trying to take advantage of a system”? This literally is the system. It’s not like this person had to lie. If this person claims to be a trans woman, they are.

What you posted sounds like you think this person isn’t “really” trans. That’s utterly transphobic. If someone says they are trans, they are.

What most other people on the thread have noted is that this person can be a trans woman if they say they are. That’s absolutely fine. But this person is a man. Saying you are a trans woman does not change your sex. “Man” refers to an adult human male. It refers to sex.

And of course, crimes committed by men must be recorded accurately, and convicted male prisoners should go to male prisons.

AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken · 14/07/2021 08:46

@RainbowMum11

Does it really matter - a child was assaulted and that isn't ok irrespective of the perpetrator
Of course it matters.

It means the perpetrator will likely be put in a female prison.

It means the victim/s will be forced to refer to the perpetrator as “she” in their statements, potentially in court.

It means a six year old boy will be told by police, counsellors and other professionals that he was a abused by a woman, despite the fact he suffered the abuse at the hands of a male and being exposed to a male’s body parts.

That six year old boy will be forced compute that horrific trauma in a way that ignores his reality in favour of the feelings of the perpetrator.

How will he ever recover if he is not allowed to even communicate about it truthfully?

GreatBigBird · 14/07/2021 08:48

This is the reply:

Hi GreatBigBird, and thanks for your thoughts.
We received a number of reports requesting that the thread was moved to the S&G topic.
We also took your own request that the thread be moved at face value
As the discussion is very much concerned with questions around sex and gender we moved it over to that section.
Unfortunately we can't reinstate the voting buttons.
Best,
MNHQ

I shouldn’t have been so quick with my second post, but I didn’t want the thread deleting and disappearing - nor did I want to get a warning.

OP posts:
AllTheUsernamesAreAlreadyTaken · 14/07/2021 08:50

They’re terrified of all this, aren’t they at MNHQ?

God forbid we use incorrect pronouns on a non-sex and gender thread. After all, it’s only discussing child abuse 😳

GreatBigBird · 14/07/2021 08:50

Ive googled this case and 'trans' is never mentioned in any of the reports that I’ve seen regarding it.

If sex is mentioned, he’s called a 'woman'. I think he’s a man. Trans is not mentioned at all.

OP posts:
AlfonsoTheMango · 14/07/2021 08:51

Here we have a situation where an adult's feelings are more important than a child's safety.

Horrifying.

Sophoclesthefox · 14/07/2021 08:56

The thing is, they will be told it was a transwoman. Because it is. Children are not thick and can understand nuance

Who is telling them this is a transwoman? The report says “woman”, and the drive in Canada is very much to refer to trans people as their identified gender, without the trans prefix.

I also think you’re vastly over estimating the ability of sexually abused six year olds to understand the nuance that the man who abused them is a kind of woman. Frankly, I think it is more likely to retraumatise the child if people around him are telling him that women can have penises.

Why should the abusers feelings be prioritised over the child’s reality?

Not surprised HQ won’t move it back. This is the position now. Pfffftttt.

floppybit · 14/07/2021 08:56

There is report error button at the bottom of the article, so I reported the following error: "This is not a woman. This is a man. Yet another crime committed by a man blamed on a woman. This is dangerous misreporting. As a woman I am horrified by what is being done to us."

PaleGreenGhost · 14/07/2021 08:58

Seriously this got moved?

There comes a point, surely, when the ideology you support asks too much of you, and something seems wrong. Is that not the moment to stop and evaluate your beliefs? People do do this. Lose their religion, change their allegiance , admit they got something wrong. It is a sign of integrity and intelligence, not weakness.

This is in plain sight. This is where we are heading. Whether by mistake or by design, this is dangerous, especially for children, especially for women.