GenderGP website
"Marianne Oakes, Dip Couns
As a fully qualified counsellor, with a post grad diploma in Gender Sexuality and Diverse Relationships, Marianne is our most experienced counsellor in the field of transgender care. She heads up our team of specialist gender counsellors at GenderGP. Marianne combines her own experiences as a trans woman with her affinity for others going through their own gender journey.
She came into this particular branch of therapy after struggling to find someone who could support her with her own transition. Marianne brings a unique insight to her practice, both from her own first hand experiences and her understanding of the impact which transition can have on families and loved ones.
She enjoys working with people of all ages, including children and their families, creating a non-judgmental space in which parents can talk openly about their own issues in relation to their child’s transition.
Client types:
Marianne works with people of all ages as well as neuro diverse individuals. She offers support to those suffering with GSRD and generic mental health challenges such as trauma, depression, anxiety and grief. She also works with families and partners who may be struggling with accepting a loved one’s transition."
www.gendergp.com/gendergp-network/marianne-oakes/
It is very apparent listening to the podcasts with Webberley and Oakes that Oakes has little awareness of family dynamics, child development, impact of grief, trauma,abuse, ADHD, autism and/or co-morbidities.
I would not be surprised if the recent exchange below becomes a case study in the future as it illustrates clear points of Safeguarding/Child Protection failure and the impact/s of gender identity ideology on a 10 year old child and family that should never have ended up being used to promote an unregulated online business.
Gender GP
"On this episode of the GenderGP podcast, Marianne and Helen are joined by the mum of a trans child. She shares her story of the challenges they’ve faced, the journey they’ve been on together, and the brave child at the heart of it."
www.gendergp.com/fighting-for-care-for-my-trans-child/
(transcript extract)
Marianne Oakes
Just to add to that, Lindsay. Is you haven't just got to have the Gillick competence to understand the medication, you've got to have the Gillick competence to understand the implications of not taking the medication, and actually that's a whole area that people forget, there's a choice here for all of you, you know for Danny to start puberty blockers or not. And yeah, there's side effects of puberty blockers. But if he doesn't take them there's a risk that he's gonna, you know his mental health is just gonna spiral, there's a risk that it will go into a tailspin that you'll end or, you know, with a life of, God knows, you know mental health issues with addictions are [unclear]. I'm not saying that it would happen. We've got to understand that that is a very high possibility. When we look at the, you know, the suicide risk. So so, not helping, there's probably more to consider by not giving the medication.
Lindsay
Absolutely, and you know what, as well I think it's so important to talk about the risks because they're always brushed under the carpet. You know, never at Tavistock, or through my GP, have we discussed, self harm, you know, depression, anxiety, suicide risk. All of these things aren't discussed but they're very much there. And that is what we need to know about so that if that does happen, we can support our children.
Marianne Oakes
I was gonna say one of the first young people I saw when I started working with Helen. They came to my therapy room in Wilmslow. And, you know everything else I've done online, but this one, I think there were about 13 or 14, this child. And the grandparent brought them, they were living with the grandparents. And I met them in the waiting room and I just said do you want to come through and I ask the grandparent did they want to come too, and they said "no I want to come through on my own." And you know, okay, as they came into the room I said "you want to take your coat off", and they took the coat off, and the scars on their arms, I nearly retched. I mean it wasn't just little vein tag cuts, they were swollen, all the way up both arms. Such was the pain being caused by dysphoria, and you know if they could have gone to their doctor before it got to that and being given the blockers, then that would never have had to happen. And this is what I say that there's a whole area of this is ignored completely, people don't want to, don't even want to acknowledge that that's a possibility. They're so focused on the side effects of medication.
Lindsay
I completely agree with you. I've seen it myself with Danny, he struggles with anxiety and low moods. This week has been really tough for him, I actually kept him off school yesterday, he, I've never seen him this low. He is normally such a chatty bubbly child. I took him to school today, and he never said a word, the whole way and that's never happened. And I can see that he's sad, and I said to him, you know "are you alright?" And he said "no," and I said "are you feeling sad" and he said, "I do feel sad, mum." You know, and it's just not, it's not on, it's not fair.
Marianne Oakes
It's not needed.
Lindsay
No, it's not needed.
Marianne Oakes
Everything you've said, Danny came out at young enough age that he should never have had to go through any of that, you know, I would say." (continues)
NB Lindsay is mother to 10 year old female child, D. D has diagnosis of ADHD and seen by CAMHS. D's parents are separated and disagree about medical interventions. Lindsay sought referral to NHS Tavistock GIDS via GP when D was 5 years old.
(extract)
Lindsay 16:50
"It's been quite a distressing experience. I personally feel. Danny's dad feels completely different. He respects what they say and thinks we should be guided by what they tell us that, as a parent, I feel completely different. I can't, I can't allow Danny, to not have hormone blockers until he's experienced periods. This is the advice I've been given. Sorry, it chokes me up thinking about it. So, for the last year and a bit, the meetings with Tavistock, Danny hasn't been he's been once to Tavistock to see them. Once in the whole time we've been with them. And he's been seen twice on Zoom, and it's so frustrating that Tavistock feel they have got enough knowledge about my child by seeing him three times to make these decisions about his future. It's wrong. It's absolutely wrong. And before I have any meeting with Tavistock I always say to Danny, I always have done: "Have you got any questions?" And he's always said to me, "When can I start the tablets?" He associated hormone blockers with those tablets, that's just how he interpreted it. So I'd always say to Tavistock, "Danny's got a question, when can he start hormone blockers?" And I was always told: "When that time comes we will support you with that." And I had complete faith that they would, but sadly that hasn't happened. A meeting in the last year, I mentioned hormone blockers, I said "Danny is developing he's definitely at Tanner stage two." I asked if there's a blood test they could do to see whether he was going through puberty and I was advised that there isn't a blood test available to check that, which isn't true, because you can check that. And I've now been told by Tavistock, that they would expect Danny to go through puberty, have periods, and then they will put him on the pathway to consider hormone blockers. Now we all know that that pathway isn't a quick pathway. I've had to make a complaint against one of our caseworkers at Tavistock, because I mentioned to her that I contacted Gender GP to sort out hormone blockers for Danny because I had to. And I was advised heavily, not to go with Gender GP, because they've been struck off, this that and the other. And I was told by this caseworker if I allowed a prepubescent child to go onto hormone blockers, it would be akin to mutilation."