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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

17 year old daughter has asked for full sex change.

109 replies

LipstickLou · 31/03/2021 06:55

DD has had lots of issues at school after an attack aged 13. Last week she tried to hurt herself claiming if I didn't support full gender reassignment she would kill herself. She has worn male clothes for 3 years and called herself by various different boy names among her friends. We now have CAMHS involvement. Last year she told me she was a girl and liked boys. I now find her boyfriend is bi sexual with a preference for boys. Her close friends are all LGBTQ. I feel she is being pressurised by these people to have operations that are irreversible. She is the youngest of the group and no longer goes to college. She has followed various YouTubers including 'Miles'. These friends are constantly in the background talking to her at 2am in the morning. I am sick with worry that she will raise the money and go abroad behind my back. I am also heartbroken. She was the queen of pink. She hit puberty at 11 and is quite top heavy which she hates. I am at my wits end. And before I am trolled my best friend is gay and I have employed a number of transgender people. Has anyone received any help for a teen such as mine DD? I really don't think she is thinking about the consequences and her father agrees.

OP posts:
TaraR2020 · 01/04/2021 17:45

You're very welcome, it sounds like a heartbreaking situation for both of you and wishing you all the best Flowers

LipstickLou · 03/04/2021 19:57

So I thank you for all all the positive messages of sport. My DD self harmed this afternoon's, sighted i don't understand having hacked my computer, She read my mumssnet post , she has a IQ of 162, so the lady who said i should block her tell me how, i am listening?
For full disclosure I have cancer, Be careful what you say. Your opinion could cost the well being gf others. I just wanted some similar experiences.

OP posts:
LipstickLou · 03/04/2021 20:04

support

OP posts:
persistentwoman · 03/04/2021 20:16

I'm so sorry to hear that LipstickLou. You both need support in different ways

I've no wise words other than to keep on listening, supporting and loving your child. I'd probably delete my account and reopen a new one when the dust has settled and you've discussed the issue of not hacking other people's internet accounts so you're guaranteed confidentiality in the future.

How is DD doing at the moment?

TaraR2020 · 03/04/2021 20:40

@LipstickLou I'm so sorry to read your update, how is your dd/ds doing now? I hope they're not badly hurt and I also hope that someone is looking after you Flowers Flowers

midgedude · 04/04/2021 08:09

How dreadful for you

You say she hacked your computer...if she did it's most likely through knowing a standard password / code that you use

If she is capable of more , GCHQ might like her talents and I think have a number of programs to capture interest
( she might find that interesting anyway )

Did she use your computer and mn account or did she just read mn ... I suspect that others online may share pointers to trans related mn threads ...and recognise the situation?

Demonstrating immature behaviour and trying to cut off any support for you. Not good.

Caaarrrl · 04/04/2021 09:01

OP, the whole style of your latest post is completely different. I am wondering if it is still actually you?

RufustheSniggeringReindeer · 04/04/2021 09:25

It is certainly different caaarrrl

LipstickLou · 04/04/2021 10:02

Again thank you all for the support. Daughter has had an approach from a potential employer because of her skills. At the moment she is not well enough to accept. I was horrified with her act of self harm yesterday but she did sit with me and talk about her thoughts. I am grateful to those with real experience of this situation. If I had quoted the facts she wouldn't have believed me. This definative decision from her came a week ago just after the discovery of my illness. A close friend has read the thread and she thinks that the facts are there and that it reaffirms my love and support for her. She said you don't like my friends, I said only some of them. She did eat her meal last night and is OK this morning. The sooner she restarts her counselling the better. Her desire to try mediaction may help her feel better about herself. I can't help being worried and broken hearted. I don't have a sympathetic family. They are a selfish lot and luckily not very social media savvy! Thank you all again.

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