Thanks for your posts Wednesday and Arabella.
One of the things which has helped many women with breastfeeding is the connection with other mothers in mother centred support groups (woman only spaces) where experiences can be shared freely, and the acknowledgment of the unique nature of the breastfeeding relationship between mother and baby. This is an exclusive relationship, mother and baby find the right balance between themselves after an often challenging first couple of months. Even if she is not breastfeeding, motherhood is a distinct role in a woman’s life and mother and baby have a unique relationship which should be acknowledged and supported by wider society. As many have argued it becomes hard to do this without meaningful language.
The use of the word mother is for many a source of strength and the recognition of the new state of motherhood can help us adjust to the massive changes in our lives which result from it.
Midwives used to visit mothers at home to offer support with this for the first 28 after the birth (every day for the first week then perhaps 3 days the next week and depending on the need of individuals after that) at which point the health visitor took over. If we want to give everyone born the best chances in life then we should allocate resources to supporting women during pregnancy birth and the postnatal period.
Gender neutral language neutralises women in my opinion and so disempowers us, it is the opposite of what feminism and maternity services should be about.
Thank you Igneococcus for the link, brilliant article by Lionel Shriver!