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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Accessible Toilets

999 replies

WarOnWomen · 03/10/2020 13:28

I've just seen this thread by Fair Play for Women regarding their stance on toilets. Maya F is also on the thread clarifying the issue.

twitter.com/fairplaywomen/status/1312062467191734273?s=21

They are saying that everyone should be comfortable choosing the toilets they want to without being forced to share with opposite sex. Yup. Trans people should also not have to share with people designated at birth. Yup, also agree. Have a mix sex category for people who don't mind and trans people. Sure.

They are saying these facilities already exist. Accessible toilets. This is where I feel lost and let down. These toilets are for disabled people. People worked hard to get these accessible toilets. I don't want my mum having to share these toilets with trans women, anymore than I want them in female spaces. It's just wrong. And don't disabled people have a say as part of the EA2010?

Please tell me I have the wrong end of the stick.

Accessible Toilets
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OhHolyJesus · 04/10/2020 10:36

For the purposes of this discussion I would want to see:

  1. A detailed and in depth consultation with all people who are registered as disabled in the U.K. to ask them how they feel about this proposal.
  1. A survey from all trans people with a GRC (as self ID is not legally recognised) in the U.K. to establish stats on the level of violence and abuse experienced when they use their single sex toilets.

Both would have to be asking very neutral questions and not be commissioned by a biased stakeholder.

No one person, whether an activist, feminist, trans person or woman speaks for all of any one group.

334bu · 04/10/2020 10:44

Getting back to the original post. I do not think that simply designating disabled toilets as " gender neutral" spaces for everyone is a fair solution. Disabled toilets are scarce enough, with many of them totally unsuitable for use by many disabled people because of bad design( toilet in a corner for example" ) and lack of equipment such as hoists. In 2020 the "urinary leash "is still the reality for many disabled people and this is truly scandalous in a first world country like ours.

WarOnWomen · 04/10/2020 11:00

@OhHolyJesus

For the purposes of this discussion I would want to see:
  1. A detailed and in depth consultation with all people who are registered as disabled in the U.K. to ask them how they feel about this proposal.
  1. A survey from all trans people with a GRC (as self ID is not legally recognised) in the U.K. to establish stats on the level of violence and abuse experienced when they use their single sex toilets.

Both would have to be asking very neutral questions and not be commissioned by a biased stakeholder.

No one person, whether an activist, feminist, trans person or woman speaks for all of any one group.

Yes, I couldn't agree more.

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merrymouse · 04/10/2020 11:02

But if they objectively aren't harming women, then them feeling unsafe in mens toilets seems as valid as women saying they feel threatened by TW.

The problem is that unless an individual or organisation can say 'that person is not a woman so shouldn't use this facility or service', (Regardless of who you think should be included in the definition 'woman'), then you can't exclude any man.

This is absolutely the fault of Stonewall et al and their insistence that there is something intrinsically wrong with gatekeeping.

Honestly, I assume that a lot of trans people avoid using any facilities when they are out in public, and that this is very restrictive. However, Stonewall is more interested in increasing market share than protecting the rights of the people they pretend to serve. You cannot protect anybody's rights if you can't explain who they are, and you can't operate honestly in the rights framework if you can't acknowledge the concept of conflicting rights.

However, I do agree that more unisex services are the way forward. In reality many, many people are restricted by lack of access to toilets and the only way to solve the problem is investment in infrastructure.

WarOnWomen · 04/10/2020 11:27

@334bu

Getting back to the original post. I do not think that simply designating disabled toilets as " gender neutral" spaces for everyone is a fair solution. Disabled toilets are scarce enough, with many of them totally unsuitable for use by many disabled people because of bad design( toilet in a corner for example" ) and lack of equipment such as hoists. In 2020 the "urinary leash "is still the reality for many disabled people and this is truly scandalous in a first world country like ours.
Agreed.

Here's a personal take on using accessible toilets. As she rightly points out, accessible toilets are for people people with physical impairments and medical conditions. I think I'm right in thinking that gender dysphoria is not a mental health issue so not eligible to access these toilets.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/metro.co.uk/2019/04/30/by-using-the-disabled-toilet-youre-putting-me-at-risk-9327740/amp/

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merrymouse · 04/10/2020 11:34

I think I'm right in thinking that gender dysphoria is not a mental health issue so not eligible to access these toilets.

Regardless of opinions on gender dysphoria, it's difficult to understand how making the accessible toilet the de facto 'gender neutral' toilet wouldn't reduce access for people who can't use the other toilets.

WarOnWomen · 04/10/2020 12:26

@merrymouse

I think I'm right in thinking that gender dysphoria is not a mental health issue so not eligible to access these toilets.

Regardless of opinions on gender dysphoria, it's difficult to understand how making the accessible toilet the de facto 'gender neutral' toilet wouldn't reduce access for people who can't use the other toilets.

I was answering MForstater's point here on why she thinks trans should be able to access these toilets.

For me, FPFW and Maya are doing what Stonewall et al have done and are doing to women. Imposing their views without consultation.

I know FPFW did clarify much later yesterday that, of course, groups representing those with disabilities should be at the table but it strikes me that it was a response to negative feedback on Twitter and thought of initially. As far as I can see, neither Nic at FPFW nor Maya have said that they consulted these groups to begin with. They haven't answered.

I also know that there's a group of women on Twitter who have started their own private chat to safeguard accessible toilets for themselves and their families as they no longer feel supported by FPFW.

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WarOnWomen · 04/10/2020 12:28

*not thought of initially

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testing987654321 · 04/10/2020 12:37

Is the problem that FPFW are trying to solve the problem that men who present as women have?

They don't want to use the men's. They then demand access to women's.
At this point the women are called mean if they say "no".
This then cleverly makes it the women's problem to solve, because the men have "nowhere to go". Despite the men's provision still existing.
So the women come up with the only solution they can think of.

I hope FPFW have a bit of a rethink on this.

jj1968 · 04/10/2020 12:42

@Malahaha

Whereas barging your way into a place where you are not wanted is typical male socialised behaviour.

Do you think most men would be happy taking a pee with someone who looks like Paris Lees stood next to them waiting to use the cubicle?

The stark fact is that within most of our lifetimes a trans women using men's toilets would have been likely to face arrest in the UK under obscenity laws. She may well have also faced arrest using the women's but pragmatically she would be less likely to stand out and much less at risk of being sexually assaulted or beaten up.

The provision of toilets has, in practice, always been based on gender. There have never been laws governing use of toilets based on sex, just as there have never been genital or ID checkers at toilets doors. And so the culture develop that trans people use toilets inline with their gender. This has been happening for decades in most countries and there is no evidence it has ever represented a risk to women despite a data set of hundreds of millions if not billions. New York alone has had specific laws allowing trans people to use toilets inline with their gender for a decade. It is a city of over 8 million people. I'm not aware of one reported incident.

There is ample evidence that trans women face sexual violence from men at the same rate as non trans woman. It therefore seems reasonable to assume that a trans women using the men's toilets would be just as much at risk as any other woman. She may also be at increased risk of transphobic violence or harassment. In addition, men's toilets are designed for men with a penis wearing male clothes, which doesn't apply to trans women who will probably need or want to use a cubicle.

So what is a trans women supposed to do? What would you do? The majority of women have reported not feeling uncomfortable with trans women using womens toilets (and the same of trans men sing the mens) and this is socially re-inforced by people's non trans friends. There is no evidence that this has caused harm. There is likely to be a risk of at worst sexual violence if she uses the men's along with all the other potential problems. Should she take that risk because a small percentage of women might feel uncomfortable? Would you be happy taking that risk? Should masculine appearing women also take that risk given they may equally make someone feel uncomfortable? Just how much should someone's comfort override someone's safety?

Cascade220 · 04/10/2020 12:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

jj1968 · 04/10/2020 12:51

I think @MForstater is right. There is no way this or probably any other government is going to mandate businesses to spend a fortune redesigning toilets spaces to include a third space, particularly when it has scant public support. So other solutions need to be considered which are pragmatic, workable and can be implemented reasonably quickly. I strongly oppose the sugestion trans people should use disabled toilets, but it's the kind of thing which will need to be looked out if this demand moves from the philosophical realm to the real world with all its practical problems. And it's those practical problems were change attempted to be implemented that I believe would lead most people to think you know what, letting trans women use the womens' hasn't really caused any problems, lets just sick with that eh.

WarOnWomen · 04/10/2020 12:55

@SpartacusAutisticus

I keep coming back to how it's just not ok to give away rights another disadvantaged group have fought for and gained, just because there is an attack on your own group's rights.

Yes.

Two things: why should women offer up the solution? Why should the solution be let's trample on another groups rights?

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Deliriumoftheendless · 04/10/2020 12:57

I’m sorry JJ I don’t understand why a transwoman would’ve been arrested under obscenity laws for using the gents in most of my lifetime. Can you elaborate on this as I’ve not heard of this happening and would like to know more.

testing987654321 · 04/10/2020 13:11

Do you think most men would be happy taking a pee with someone who looks like Paris Lees stood next to them waiting to use the cubicle?

No idea, why would men care if Lees is just waiting to pee and not doing anything weird?

The stark fact is that within most of our lifetimes a trans women using men's toilets would have been likely to face arrest in the UK under obscenity laws.

What? I have never heard such stuff before. Any evidence of this happening?

She may well have also faced arrest using the women's but pragmatically she would be less likely to stand out and much less at risk of being sexually assaulted or beaten up.

Eh? So you are now saying the same person could be arrested for obscenity for being either in the gents or ladies?!
Well anyone getting beaten up in the ladies is extremely rare, so you are correct that they wouldn't fear being there.

The provision of toilets has, in practice, always been based on gender. There have never been laws governing use of toilets based on sex, just as there have never been genital or ID checkers at toilets doors.

No, toilet provision has been based on sex. A woman has no use for urinals but does need a bin in the cubicle. Women can basically not use men's facilities.

And, just for the very last time, no-one needs to check genitals because it's obvious whether someone is male of female based on many features.

And so the culture develop that trans people use toilets inline with their gender. This has been happening for decades in most countries and there is no evidence it has ever represented a risk to women despite a data set of hundreds of millions if not billions. New York alone has had specific laws allowing trans people to use toilets inline with their gender for a decade. It is a city of over 8 million people. I'm not aware of one reported incident

The number of trans people has exploded in the last few years, so going back decades tells us nothing.

And "no evidence of risk"? Check out this never happens.
.

There is ample evidence that trans women face sexual violence from men at the same rate as non trans woman. It therefore seems reasonable to assume that a trans women using the men's toilets would be just as much at risk as any other woman.

Why is this women's problem to sort out?

She may also be at increased risk of transphobic violence or harassment. In addition, men's toilets are designed for men with a penis wearing male clothes, which doesn't apply to trans women who will probably need or want to use a cubicle.

Again, why is this women's problem? We have long queues often in the ladies and don't need extras in there.

So what is a trans women supposed to do? What would you do? The majority of women have reported not feeling uncomfortable with trans women using womens toilets (and the same of trans men sing the mens) and this is socially re-inforced by people's non trans friends. There is no evidence that this has caused harm. There is likely to be a risk of at worst sexual violence if she uses the men's along with all the other potential problems. Should she take that risk because a small percentage of women might feel uncomfortable?

Ignoring women's feelings despite supposedly being one.

Would you be happy taking that risk?
No, I'm a woman.

Should masculine appearing women also take that risk given they may equally make someone feel uncomfortable?

This again? Women are perfectly able to cope with masculine looking women. If a woman appears male at first glance she needs to do no more than smile or speak and it's obvious she's a woman.

Just how much should someone's comfort override someone's safety?

Exactly. Women's safety depends on them being able to take action when a man is in an inappropriate place, because the risks he poses. Having obvious men in the women's because of their feelings is not fair on women. If men don't feel safe in the men's they need to campaign for a reduction in male violence or individual toilets etc, not just use the women's.

CopsCantCatchCriminals · 04/10/2020 13:11

... I can fully imagine a load of transphobic weirdos hanging around any toilets..

I can fully imagine a load of transphobic men hanging around any toilets

There - fixed it for you.

(Note. NAMATW)

testing987654321 · 04/10/2020 13:13

Jj I am bored now, your comments make no sense and are thoroughly dismissive of women. Why someone with your attitude thinks a feminist space is appropriate for them i have no idea.

OvaHere · 04/10/2020 13:13

Do you think most men would be happy taking a pee with someone who looks like Paris Lees stood next to them waiting to use the cubicle?

But women are supposed to be happy with the Danielle Muscato's and the other 90% upwards of people calling themselves trans women/genderfluid/non binary who don't resemble women in anything other that the wearing of gendered clothing?

Everything you wrote above is a stream of whataboutism and centring male feelings whether that be trans women or bog standard men. Further to that you're here on a board for feminism doing it. Kind of proves Malahaha's point.

Bathrooms are really just the thin end of the wedge that's lead to truly extremist attitudes and horrific policy that oppresses women and targets the most vulnerable of us.

I haven't yet seen you on the thread where a trans woman is targeting mothers who have suffered a stillbirth or the other countless threads where the natural conclusion of letting any man identify as a woman are laid out clearly to see.

CopsCantCatchCriminals · 04/10/2020 13:14

Do you think most men would be happy taking a pee with someone who looks like Paris Lees stood next to them waiting to use the cubicle?

But women on the other hand should just man up and accept it. Obvs.

Terfarina · 04/10/2020 13:16

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Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

jj1968 · 04/10/2020 13:33

@Deliriumoftheendless

I’m sorry JJ I don’t understand why a transwoman would’ve been arrested under obscenity laws for using the gents in most of my lifetime. Can you elaborate on this as I’ve not heard of this happening and would like to know more.
Trans women historically faced police harassment or arrest often on the grounds of offending public decency in the UK merely for being in public. A trans women in a man's toilets would probably have been assumed to be gay by police and arrested for solicitation. In the US it was even worse with many states having specific legislation forbidding cross dressing.
OhHolyJesus · 04/10/2020 14:06

From February, the HoL debate in toilets. Note the discussion on single sex spaces and on disabled toilets.

hansard.parliament.uk/lords/2020-02-24/debates/D9459D1B-FADF-4765-AB3F-F55D4B322060/ChangingAndToiletFacilitiesInPublicBuildings

As I am not disabled in any or a wheelchair user so I'm going to listen to those who are.

Baroness Tani Grey-Thompson:

As a disabled person, I face that problem every single day. When an accessible toilet is not being used as a storeroom, there is a last-moment celebration. Every train I get on and every new building I go to, I have to think about whether there is an accessible toilet. I was in a restaurant last week. Everyone checked that it was accessible for me to get in there but, right at the last minute, they realised that the women’s toilets were downstairs. There was a panic because, if I needed to go, I would have to tell about 10 people and they would have to clear out the men’s toilets for me to use them. That is not a position that any woman wants to be in. We need to have more accessible toilets. It is great that there is recognition of invisible impairments, but this comes back to redesigning what we have.

A lot of disabled toilets are locked for a reason. Apparently, they are places where people go to take drugs and have sex. That is the excuse and the reason given for why they are locked. But the Radar scheme, which is available in so many places, does not show on the outside whether or not the toilet door is locked. I was in one of these toilets recently, when a gentleman did not realise and opened the door and walked in on me. We both panicked, and it felt like for ever before the door closed again. That is one option I have. If there is somebody in an accessible toilet who needs to be in there for a long period of time, the only other option I have is to use the women’s toilet. In that instance, I have to go with the door open. I am not sure whether I have publicly declared this before, but I am incontinent; I have to catheterise. I have to sit with my chair in the door of the toilet. Without going into the details, I am in a potentially vulnerable position when I catheterise myself. I need to wash my hands before and straight afterwards; it is even more difficult when I have my period. My biggest fear is that someone will run away with my chair for a bit of a laugh. As a disabled person, that is a very vulnerable position to be in.

And Lord Blancathra:

As one of 800,000 wheelchair users, I, too, have an interest in access to toilets and I agree with what has been said so far about their inadequacy. There are over 70,000 public buildings in the UK that wheelchair users cannot get into, let alone have the luxury of deciding which toilet to use. My blunt message to the Government tonight is this: when will you stand up to the small, militant, transgender fascist lobby and say that the rights of 32 million real women and 800,000 wheelchair users are more important than the rights of tens of thousands who identify as transgender?

Cascade220 · 04/10/2020 14:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WarOnWomen · 04/10/2020 14:25

OhHolyJesus Thanks for that link. It was very interesting, measured debate and very moving too.

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Malahaha · 04/10/2020 14:27

The provision of toilets has, in practice, always been based on gender. There have never been laws governing use of toilets based on sex, just as there have never been genital or ID checkers at toilets doors. And so the culture develop that trans people use toilets inline with their gender. This has been happening for decades in most countries and there is no evidence it has ever represented a risk to women despite a data set of hundreds of millions if not billions.

What a ludicrous statement, not even worthy of a reply.
"Gender" was never a concept up to a few years ago. It has always been SEX.
As for "genital checking" -- spare me. Never in the history of mankind has such a thing been necessary, and it isn't now.

And I repeat, for the hundredth time, and the 3rd time on this thread: It's not just about risk. Of equal importance is our sense of dignity and privacy.
I guarantee you, the quickest way to empty a changing room or shower of women is to have a non-passing transwoman walk in.

I have three granddaughters and live in Ireland.
I absolutely do not want to envision a future where they might be forced to share private facilities with 50 year old transwomen.

I cannot imagine any parent who would allow that.

A huge backlash is going to come -- self-id is relatively new in Ireland and I personally have never witnessed any tw here, nor any mixed sex toilets, not even in Dublin, neither in the airport, museums, art galleries and the like.

But if it gains traction, and everything starts changing to the benefit of tw, there WILL be a backlash. Guaranteed.

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