Taking me ages to get through this thread..
We've got another mumsnetter above you saying that I'm wrong and mumsnetters do extend that courtesy to transpeople by calling them their preferred pronouns, despite the majority of posters on this, and other threads, saying they will not be told which pronoun to use
Eh..you know that mumsnetters are just singular people with differing opinions, and there is no 'MN consensus' or anything on any topic!? I do find it odd, how people seem to think that if one, two, or many mumsetters think something, this means all of them do. NAMNALT. Each differing thread will bring out a differing range of opinions, based on whos online and who facies replying to it tbh..
But I think, from years of talking about this topic, its still the majority who will use the wrong pronouns in order to make trans people feel more comfortable. I do, however I simply cannot bring myself to use her for the likes of rapists (which seems a bit hypocritical, as thats basically me saying 'I am willing to lie to make you feel better but only if you are a good person). Many of those who will no longer lie..did lie about it for a long time, its only the demands of transactivists, and learning more about 'queer theory'..and talking to trassexual people in some cases, that have made them stop. Though I will lie, I do understand where those who will not are coming from, especially with how much every piece of language relating to female people is being butchered these days. Never see tranactivists kicking off with men/mens charities about using the word man for some reason..odd really. As usual, only women are targetted. Similar to how when MEN physically attack transwomen, its blamed on feminists, as those nasty feminists have influenced these violent men into being violent. Because of course, violent men always listen to what feminists have to say and act how feminists would want them to, thats why so much male violence is a part of so many womens daily lives 
Transactivists claim you cannot know someones sex by looking at them. Odd how they always seem to know which people to abuse, ad they also know which tras people to shove to the bottom of the pile (ie. its always about centreing transwomen). The obsession with genitals thing is bonkers btw, theres so much more to sex than genitals, and accusing feminists of being focussed on genitals is, again, more DARVO. They seem to think its some huge 'gotchya' when talking about sex segregated areas, if they strawman this imaginary want of feminists, of people on changing room doors who check genitals on the way in. Weird fantasy, in the huge majority of cases, sex is massively obvious, and anyone who claims otherwise is lying to themselves for whatever reason. Wome might be able to tell sex from a glance easier than men, it does seem that way anecdotally. This is possibly evolution in action, women need to know who is male for their own safety.