Pronoun rules at work

[RatinaMaze]

My workplace have just announced that “they/their” pronouns will be used for all staff members by default now. Apparently this neutral pronoun removes any unintentional offence and normalises non-binary colleagues. There is a caveat though; staff members who have transitioned may feel upset by not being able to use the pronoun aligned to their gender so, in these cases, the individuals can use he/him or she/her as appropriate.

Let me repeat this. Biological men and women are no longer allowed to use he/she pronouns in the workplace but transpeople are.

You know what would normalise non-binary? Encouraging bio-males to use he/him and bio females to use she/her but doing so while wearing what they want and pursuing whatever hobbies they want. Susan in Accounts might have shaved her head, wears no make-up and enjoys taking cars apart at the weekend while Mike in Marketing might wear eyeliner and/or a dress and spend his evening decorating cupcakes. That is called having a personality and it is already normal. I don’t know anyone who lives every minute of their lives in a way that adheres to the stereotype of the gender norm that society has associated with their biological sex. We are all non-binary, except we don’t call it that because it is a normal state. We don’t need to impose pronouns to normalise this.

I can't speak up. I can't afford to lose my job.

So what they’re saying is that they’re singling out and treating their ‘gender reassigned’ colleagues differently to their ‘non-gender reassigned’ colleagues, correct me if I’m wrong but isn’t that discrimination?

Also they’re discriminating against women by not calling them she/her but are calling some people who’s legal sex is male she/her, isn’t that discrimination?

Another person who would have thought this was a joke years ago. I don't want to be "they".

Interestingly they/ them is common rather than assuming male default.

e.g. if you ask an accountant they are likely to say X, as opposed to he is likely to say X.

A couple of years ago I was at a presentation where this didn't happen and to have all roles assumed as he was really jarring, it made me realise how embedded that is.

And of course that was a feminist thing to stop e.g. if you ask the manager he will tell you X but if you talk to the receptionist she will tell you y.

Sorry terrible examples!

I'd be ok with no titles and they/ them across the board probably, but changes to language like that take YEARS. The idea you can opt out puts a massive burden on people to remember a lot of stuff about other people. I'm bad enough with names and faces! Big companies still need an intranet look up system for this.

The other problem is that apparently when we see other adults we notice

First sex
Then skin colour
Then things like age, height,
And onto clothes hair etc

As animals, sex is a fundamental automatic classification and I'm sure the oldest one there is. All animals know male/ female don't they. Because reproduction etc.

So pulling that away and saying you can't guess and you don't know and you might have to go against the most basic categorisation there is will be really hard.

It would be easier to desex it entirely. But, as the company in the op has catered for, that's not what some trans people want.