'Kiss on the cheek'- a crime or sexual assault

[ScrimpshawTheSecond]

I feel terrible for the woman here. She helped out a lorry driver who then kissed her on the cheek - and she is now terrified about corona virus.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-derbyshire-52699104

Men, if you're reading this - just fucking don't do it. Ever, let alone to an elderly woman during a viral pandemic.

I hope they catch the man and he understands what he's done.

A kiss on the cheek as a thank you is not sexual.

My teen made me a coffee. I kissed him on the cheek to say thank you..

Trust me my kiss was not well received.. Well on the surface anyway..

But it certainly wasn't sexual and neither was it assault

Taken in the context of the lack of consent in this case it would be investigated as a sexual assault

There is more to it than the lack of consent. The act needs to have a sexual intent. Kissing might be. The jury in the Paul Gascoigne case found him not guilty because of the lack of a sexual element.

Kissing is not by its nature sexual: others have given examples of that. Kissing may or may not be sexual and prosecutors should look at the context of the act. Lack of consent does not make the act sexual. If the kiss was lascivious then it may be judged to be sexual even if done under the pretext of giving thanks for help.

@Auntlouisa is the lack of awareness also applies to queuing?
If you saw someone not queuing would you be happy to say it’s a lack of awareness because they are from ?
I’m pretty sure people would find it extremely rude, regardless of the country.

Same applies with kissing imo. I am not particularly aware. No more than most people. The fact that 99% of people would be uncomfortable receiving a kiss from someone they’ve never met is quite obvious. I wouldn’t use that as an excuse

Re a kiss being sexual, who can decide if it is sexual? The person receiving a kiss?

By experience, a kiss can be a non sexual way to say hello. Or a sexually loaded kiss (many memories as a teen/young adult where such a kiss carried very clear intentions/message). The difference from the outside will be a second or two longer. And the intention the receiver will feel but might be hard to pinpoint/show from the outside.

I have to say, I have no idea how you could prove that at a tribunal.

It seems very hard to judge, given the limited information. I've found it overwhelming when I've been rescued from a breakdown (blown fuse but I'd have never thought to check) because it's such a polar shift from your plans falling apart to everything being fine. I didn't kiss them but I certainly hugged them tightly enough to get relieved tears on their shoulder. I'd have a hard time judging someone in a similar situation.

It's really weird to kiss a stranger in the cheek in the UK. I mean unless you're in the pub and all drunk and have met your new best friends!

It doesn’t sound (on the facts given) as though it was a sexual assault for the purposes of the Sexual Offences Act 2003 (see sections 3 and 78 of that Act). It was however a battery, and in the context (Covid) a very unpleasant one. The police should have pursued it as such; sounds like they got it wrong.
Awful behaviour from the man involved. Hope they catch him.

I'd forgotten about Gazza's trial. I guess the thing that's often overlooked is the comparative size and strength of a male foisting a kiss on a woman. Perhaps v hard for males to understand how intimidating and intrusive that can feel. Even notwithstanding social distancing, covid etc.

Would the kiss itself infect someone? On the cheek. I'd be more worried by the man breathing and speaking near my face.

A kiss involves bodily fluids, so yes, quite possibly. I think any contact or close proximity has a risk of contagion.

I used to be terrified of my great aunt's big smooching kisses!

I can’t believe people are splitting hairs here.

Whatever happened here, the woman was clearly shaken and upset enough to report to the police.

If a stranger tried to kiss me on the cheek in normal circumstances I’d feel weird, let alone at the moment.

Saying “it’s only a kiss on the cheek” and saying worse crimes exist is ridiculous - if someone punched me I’d report them for assault, despite the fact that people get stabbed and murdered.

And I can also imagine plenty of circumstances where the man could have been intimidating and forceful and made the woman feel vulnerable and afraid... but it’s “only” a kiss on the cheek isn’t it...

I used to be terrified of my great aunt's big smooching kisses!

That's what springs to my mind. Aunts and female family friends sexually assualting myself and my brother hundreds of times with unwanted, un-consented kisses.
My MILs friend still does it to DH, even though she knows he hates it.
I flinch when our French friends kiss me on the cheeks, but I'm sure they don't consider it sexual assault.

I dislike social kissing full stop. It has always made me very uncomfortable, but I have gone along with it for politeness.

But from now on I'm going to stand my ground and decline with a step back and a raised hand if someone swoops in, so perhaps that's one positive for me to come of of this current crisis.

Aunts and female family friends sexually assualting myself and my brother hundreds of times with unwanted, un-consented kisses.

This is why I dont foist kisses on my son, and have asked others not too as well. He has said he doesn't like it, and I dont want him to grow up thinking it's ok to ignore other people boundaries and force things like kisses on to them.

Saying “it’s only a kiss on the cheek”

Has anyone said that? Posters have said it is probably not a sexual assault because of the lack of sexual intent.

Poor woman, no wonder she's terrified. Perhaps he just forgot, perhaps he's a prat like the supermarket shelf lickers, perhaps he doesn't believe in the virus ..whatever reason it should be assault given the pandemic.

Plus she may self isolate now leading her to lose income on top of her health risk.

Touching someone wo their consent is still touching someone wo their consent.

So someone touching your arm when you’re on a packed tube together is sexual assault?

Never heard of a kiss on the cheek being sexual. Cheek kisses are what your nan gives you. Never been kissed on the cheek by a partner.

Yes, Pertella, I'm doing my best to raise my kids with strong awareness of bodily autonomy, boundaries and consent.

Maybe he did it without thinking? Like when you accidentally call the teacher 'mum' or sign off on a work call with 'love you'? I've never done this but I have hugged people I barely knew then thought 'wtf' afterwards. Hopefully they didn't think i was a predator. I'm as feminist as they come but isn't it possible it was just an 'action slip' and for a split second he treated her like his own mum? He might have been kicking himself all the way home.

Possible, RuffleCrow. I just wonder if he would have done the same if it were a big, burly man. Maybe he would have?

It's probably unlikely that he would have kissed a man but that doesn't mean it was sexual. By that logic, him shaking hands with a man would be sexual assault as he wouldn't have done it with a woman.

I don't mean that that makes it sexual, so much as that makes it something a stronger person would impose on a more vulnerable, weaker person. Which makes it a dominance and assertion or bullying gesture.

By that logic, him shaking hands with a man would be sexual assault as he wouldn't have done it with a woman.

Men and women shake hands all the time