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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

What constitutes modern day feminism

635 replies

katienlisa552 · 05/04/2020 10:45

What does it mean to be a feminist in the 21st century? When I and indeed the members of my family who I would consider to be feminist were growing up it was about fighting for equal rights for women such as equal pay and better representation of women in high powered jobs and given that the Labour Party has yet again elected a male leader says to me that there is still along way to go. However I and my family members find ourselves becoming more and more uncomfortable with what some might call the more extreme side of feminism.

I fear that certain views of feminism are allowing a rather unhealthy and quite hateful form especially in relation to trans rights. As a member of the lgbt community and although I’m not trans myself I do have friends who are and I also volunteer for a local charity who support and offer counselling to trans teenagers. I see first hand the damage done by the attitudes promoted and supported by some sections of the feminist community dressed up under the guise of ‘free speech’. The trans right issue is a complex one. I don’t think children should be allowed to transition or be given hormone blockers to prevent puberty because I’m not convinced a child has the maturity to make those kind of life changing decisions although that doesn’t mean I don’t believe that children can’t be trans because I see it everyday through my work with the charity and it’s a fact of great shame that at least 70% of young trans have self harmed or tried to commit suicide because of the prejudice they face.

The biggest contentious issue appears to be that of self indentification. I fail to see how it erodes my rights as a women if a trans person chooses to self identify and personally I find the notion that people chose to self identify because they want to harm others somewhat far fetched. Yes I accept that there are some sick indivuals that do this but the fact is the majority of sex offenders offend as men not men who are self identifying as female or the other wan around. I remember mixed sex changing rooms when I was growing up and I don’t remember a vast increase in sexual assay because of it.

Now despite being accused of it on here several times by people who hide behind the guise of feminism to attack anyone who dares to defend trans rights as someone who condones sexual assault I do not in fact as a surviour of sexual assault I find that extremely offensive. Anyone trans or otherwise who commits any kind of sexual assault deserves to be castrated and strung up. Maybe one way around the shared changing room or toilet issue would be to have single cubicles or toilets as we do at our charity so it doesn’t matter who uses them because there’s only u on there. As a parent and someone who works with children who have been absued I can totally understand the argument for parents wanting to know who the child is sharing a changing room with. Personally I wouldn’t allow my son or my nieces who I regularly look after our without a grown up until they were of teenager age and then allow in groups of friends.

I’ve no doubt that this post will either be ignored or removed as mums net seems to remove anything that resembles some who supports the rights of trans people but just as the people who use feminism to try and erode or stand Agasint trans rights I to have the right to express my opinion.

The debate of feminism and trans issues needs to be less toxic and more about open discussion and tolerance of others opinions will allowing healthy debate because trans people are people and have the same right to be heard and to be given the same freedoms as any other member of society. Do I think that all feminists are transphobic absolutely not and neither do I believe that all of the trans community min are good people. There’s good and bad in everyone and every group of society but since when is that a justification for the discrimination of a whole part of society

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katienlisa552 · 05/04/2020 14:51

I’m not a bloke unless of cause u think gay women are blokes

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Helmetbymidnight · 05/04/2020 14:51

how do you know youre not a bloke?

YetAnotherSpartacus · 05/04/2020 14:51

How did they get the OP so literate?

FloralBunting · 05/04/2020 14:52

I'm quite enjoying the performance art nature of the random unspecific responses. It's mildly diverting scrolling back to work out who AliasBespin might be responding to.

MrsDoylesTeaBags · 05/04/2020 14:52

Katie I thought you came here to discuss modern day feminism. So far you have not discussed anything to do with feminism. I mean you've shared a lot more than is necessary and healthy about your colleagues, charges and young family members. You've shared some pretty contratictory facts abut yourself, but you've not discussed feminism.

So what's that all about?

koshkatt · 05/04/2020 14:52

Nice story bro. Grin

katienlisa552 · 05/04/2020 14:52

The same way u are if u are

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Justhadathought · 05/04/2020 14:52

I’ve no doubt that this post will either be ignored or removed as mums net seems to remove anything that resembles some who supports the rights of trans people but just as the people who use feminism to try and erode or stand Agasint trans rights I to have the right to express my opinion

You'll actually find this board far more tolerant and liberal than most trans rights boards.

People who identify as trans already have equal civil and legal rights......what is wanted is 'additional' rights...and some of those additional rights conflict with the rights of women as a distinct group. this is the job of politics to deal with conflicts of interest - not to deny that there is a conflict of interest.

My advice would be for you to campaign for third spaces.. that way everyone can have their needs for dignity, privacy and safety met.

Trans identified people comprise a wide range of people......and they do not all share the same characteristics. We have young women ( most often lesbians) identifying as male; they have nothing in common with older AGP men....heterosexual & who have been cross dressing most of their lives; or even necessarily with homosexual trans women.

BovaryX · 05/04/2020 14:52

I’m a gay women

Do you self identify as plural?

katienlisa552 · 05/04/2020 14:53

I don’t really know how to define feminism

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1Micem0use · 05/04/2020 14:53

There is no one way that feminism looks like, there never has been. There's always been divisions/different groups within the feminist movement, despite having the same overall goal.
Mumsnet has a large number of gender critical, as they call themselves, feminists. In other places you can find feminists who are inclusive of transwomen.
It's important, I think, to listen to all the different groups and try to understand them. Even when you feel they've got it wrong.

FloralBunting · 05/04/2020 14:53

We noticed.

Helmetbymidnight · 05/04/2020 14:53

The same way u are if u are ?!?!

katienlisa552 · 05/04/2020 14:54

No I indentify as a lesbian that what a gay women is

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MarieQueenofScots · 05/04/2020 14:54

I believe that trans women are women and should be treated as such equally the same with trans men

How do you treat someone as a woman?

Here’s a scenario for you. I was involved in a discussion group surrounding the longterm physical effects of miscarriage. We ended up having to stop as a TRA started calling us bigoted for excluding transwomen. Now explain how a transwoman can have any physical effects of miscarriage and why vulnerable women should discuss intimate medical issues in front of a male?

FloralBunting · 05/04/2020 14:54

Ah, wondered how long it would take for another team member to rock up.

koshkatt · 05/04/2020 14:55

You have no idea what feminism is 'Katie'. You are just another angry TRA.

scotsheather · 05/04/2020 14:55

Bovary Grin

MarieQueenofScots · 05/04/2020 14:56

As a lesbian would you fuck someone with a penis?

I0NA · 05/04/2020 14:56

I'm quite enjoying the performance art nature of the random unspecific responses

Grin

I didn’t know there was a name for it.

koshkatt · 05/04/2020 14:56

Ah - they must have helped 'Katie' write the OP!

katienlisa552 · 05/04/2020 14:57

Well I can understand the basics of feminism as in equal rights for women and men I don’t understand gender critical feminists but then that’s probably because I support the trans community

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koshkatt · 05/04/2020 14:58

Can you not understand that feminism is for, and about, women and girls. Just women and girls. Not men?

Justhadathought · 05/04/2020 14:59

And how do trans rights erode your rights as a women it doesn’t people just use that as an excuse for bigotry

By permitting male bodied people into private spaces, services and sports which were created to cater for female bodied people, you erode female rights to the dignity, comfort and privacy of their sex; as well as to unfairness in competition.

Sex is registered in instinctive as well as unconscious ways. Sex matters. It is real.

katienlisa552 · 05/04/2020 14:59

I have had trans partners in the past

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