Please can we talk about using the name Karen as an insult?

[NiceKaren]

I'm seeing the name Karen being used as an insult all over social media. It started as a meme, but in the last few days I've seen 'Karen' being blamed for panic buying, refusing to self-isolate and general selfishness. My name is Karen and in these tricky times it feels really unpleasant to see my name being used this way. It feels sexist, ageist and most likely classist too. Now I'm seeing it on MN as well and it makes me so sad. I can't help my name and while I used to laugh it off, I'm feeling quite upset by it tonight. Why do people do this?

I suppose I'm just posting for solidarity and wondering whether there is any point in trying to call this sort of thing out? Before, I felt it was just me being precious or unable to take a joke but now it feels quite personal and ugly.

It's also a demonstration of how women are grouped into 'types' much more than men, usually by men, as we are 2D characters rather than whole people. The entertainment industry has played it's part in this a lot, at least the stuff we have consumed in the UK for years often out of USA, with women in films props to further the man's story. While the men even if a stereotype are given a more rounded personality, and of course they always 'get the girl'.

NiceKaren
Totally agree, wasn’t brave enough to start a thread about this, but have felt increasingly disturbed about this in all areas of my life with respect to many different names.
In Chaucer’s time people were named after particular physical or personality features, some complimentary and some less so,
Similarly people were named after the nature of their work and this carried down to their offspring.
In modern times children are given names for any reason their parents feel is fitting, and it’s upsetting to see others try to impose negative connotations to a persons name.

Oddly enough, I've never heard a man refer to someone as a 'Karen'. It's always been women using the put down about another woman, in my experience.

I appreciate that others' experiences might be different, but it took this OP to make me realise the above. And now I'm quite depressed.

You have my support. There is a lot of ageism on Mumsnet and I've been close to walking away on a number of occasions because of it. I'm happy to join in calling it out.

I agree, its nasty and generally used in an "ok boomer" way for young people to be snide to middle aged women. Little shits. My DCs use it sometimes on me and they get pretty short shrift for it. If my name actually were Karen I would be livid that its used as an insult.

And even Dick doesn't really have it so bad - yes people will laugh at his name, but the likelihood is, he's actually called Richard so he has some other options!

And yes classism too.

I hate it too, it makes me wince when I see it.

I agree totally op.

I get it OP. I saw a thread on this board recently talking about Beryl and felt the same.

My teen started using Karen last year until I pointed out just who used the term and who ‘Karen’ was being used to represent. I also pointed out that it was often being used to suppress and undermine women’s opinions. Particularly of a certain age.

I love the name and the Karen i know is a wonderful woman. I hate that it's used as an insult and agree it's sexist and ageist like how dare these silly irrelevant old hags speak out or challenge anything.

Agreed

#Solidarity. Another way of putting women down. Has been Sharon, Tracey, or Becky in the past so try not to let it get to you. There are many awesome Karen's, with Karen Ingala Smith being super-bloody-great, and including the Karen people who originate from Burma
en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karen_people

As with the TE** nonsense for radical feminists, name calling is no substitute for a proper argument. Let the children play 🙄

Thank you everyone! I was wondering if I was being too precious about the whole thing. I really don't think in the UK we have a male equivalent. Totally unscientific but I also feel like I've seen more women using this as an insult recently, though perhaps I just notice it more when it's a woman doing it?

I do wonder if this hadn't been my name if I would have casually used some of the other name memes. I like to think not - don't think I have in the past that I can recall and I certainly wouldn't now.

I've been getting a lot of bbc clips of outnumbered on fb recently. If this is a common thing maybe the notion/naming has slipped into our subconscious(ness/es)

Thank you so much for that link @Socrates11 I can't believe I hadn't heard of the Karen people - going to do some reading up.

I think.a lot of the very personalized insults feel especially biting at the moment, as you say, everything is heightened.

I'm trying to focus on the nicer consequence of that, in the many people choosing to be more caring and better, but for those that had already embraced the selfish gene and delighted in abusing other humans, particularly women, their callousness seems to be heightened too, sadly.

FWIW, whenever I am writing a story, a female character will often start out as a Karen if I intend her to be a generally positive sort.

When my 12yo DS called me ‘Karen’ I pointed out it was an experienced older woman who called out the bullshit she encountered in society. So not an insult at all!

For those who like this sort of thing, I highly recommend the ONS name trends checker. Karen was most definitely at it’s peak in the mid to late 60s in the U.K. It’s great fun. Most popular mid 70s girl names was Nicola. I’m friends with loads!

I understand that people are frightened at the moment but the anger and vitriol online at the moment is awful (rarely on this board thankfully).
You're not being precious OP. And I know two wonderful women called Karen

A couple of famous Karen’s to make you feel better OP.

I’d like to know what is wrong with asking to speak to the manager anyway?
Why should we put up with shit service/goods and have the pleasure of paying for it?

(And all the Karens I’ve known have been lovely)

I stand with you.
#justiceforkaren

Would any bloke, like myself even dream of doing this to try to demean women, seriously? I do not demean women, but even if I did, would I pick a woman's name to do it?
Maybe, I am totally out of touch and maybe, I have never indulged in this sort of thing.
The people who do indulge, are maybe IMHO missing a few brain cells.

Plus the photo used in the meme is Kate Gosselin from Kate Plus Eight. Not even called Karen!

I think I cried when this Karen died.

Im a wendy. Bloody hate it... 😂