Are you non binary...

[Bearsinmotion]

According to Wikipedia?

Non-binary, or genderqueer, is a spectrum of gender identities that are not exclusively masculine or feminine‍—identities that are outside the gender binary.[1] Non-binary identities can fall under the transgender umbrella, since many non-binary people identify with a gender that is different from their assigned sex[2] but does not necessarily, as some intersex people are also non-binary.

Non-binary people may identify as having two or more genders (being bigender or trigender);[4][5] having no gender (agender, nongendered, genderless, genderfree or neutrois); moving between genders or having a fluctuating gender identity (genderfluid);[6] being third gender or other-gendered (a category that includes those who do not place a name to their gender).

Gender identity is separate from sexual or romantic orientation,[8] and non-binary people have a variety of sexual orientations, just as cisgender people do.

A non-binary gender is not associated with a specific gender expression, such as androgyny. Non-binary people as a group have a wide variety of gender expressions, and some may reject gender "identities" altogether.

I'm happy to answer questions..

Oh no you're not!

He's behind you, etc.

I genuinely think non-binary is not just about not identifying with stereotypes, but is related to autism. When unable to participate socially in the same way neurotypical women do, it's easy for someone on the spectrum to attribute this not to their autism, but to not being a 'real' woman. Even feminist women who are very gender non-conforming, but who are neurotypical, still communicate with others with the extra social abilities that those on the spectrum don't have. I think this leads some autistic women to conclude that they aren't women because they don't have these social abilities, when even those women who they meet that are gender non-conforming like them still feel somewhat alien to them. This is because we've been told for decades that women don't have Asperger's, or if they do it's incredibly rare. We're only discovering now that it's far more common in women than the male scientists had told previously told us, due to their biased ideas about pink and blue brains. I think female autistic visibility and opportunities for autistic women to connect is incredibly important. No wonder autistic women will think they are 'trans' or non-binary if they never see other women who are like them, and have the message rammed home day after day that if you're not able to do all the touchy feely/mean girls stuff.

... sorry, that was a bit garbled, still drunk from last night, probably! 🥂

According to that list yes! I am female but feel more masculine than feminine. I like to wear androgynous clothing and hate anything patterned or frilly or too feminine looking. I wear bras that don't accentuate my breasts as I don't particularly like having them. I have an analytical mind and personality wise am more similar to a lot of the men I know. In my marriage I am the more practical and pragmatic one and my husband is the more romantic, sensitive one.

But I also have...a vagina and uterus! And am therefore female.

To me sex and gender are the same thing.

Yet, they're not. Gender is about the roles and expectations from society.

In that sense, I don't think we can ever identify as a gender, because it's mostly ruled by perceptions from others. That's why people who want to be seen differently have to ask others to put them in the whatever gender they want, but it doesn't quite work out well.

You may well ask men to call you they or consider you as non-binary, but they will always think of you as female.

Most of us just get on with it, and act and dress how we feel like it.

I really like the idea of a female autistic pride event, where autistic women could meet one another, have some visibility and celebrate the fact that 'some women are autistic, get over it!' It should be run by autistic women themselves, to avoid the kind of marketing of autism by those who think you need to 'sell' autism to people by demonstrating all the cool tricks autistic people can do, essentially treating them like performing dogs. It's a tricky one though, because parents of severely autistic children may think there's nothing to celebrate, and that the high functioning ones are leaving out the difficulties their families face. I think it's very important that autistic women have some sort of role models to identify with though, so they don't think they have to take a lifetime worth of damaging drugs and have their breasts cut off just because they feel different to other women.

Everyone is non-binary. We have cultural, social gender norms and we all roll with them to a certain degree while rejecting other according to our own comfort level. I do many things because they are what women in my society do and for no other reason. Some I'm fine with, some I'd really rather not but do anyway because rolling with it feels less uncomfortable than rejecting the norm. And others I reject entirely because following the norm is more uncomfortable than rejecting it.

And every single other human on the planet is the same, we just all have our own lines. In fact, I know 3 women who have in recent years started to identify as non-binary. They all have the same short, carefully maintained, shaved on one side, hanging over the eye on the other, haircut that is currently in fashion for women who "reject gender." Men don't often have this haircut. They all shape their eyebrows and have no other facial hair despite all being the age where we start to get a bit of a tash and beard. They all wear a breast binder. And they all shave their arm-pits and legs in summer.

I find them to be some of the most gender following people I know. They aren't being gender neutral, they are slavishly following a very, very particular women's fashion, where they take a lot of effort to supposedly reject the 'preening' of women. It's massively misogynistic but also ignorantly hypocritical because they are paying far, far more attention to carefully cultivating their appearance, to the point where they physically hurt themselves, than most of the women who's gendered vanity they supposedly reject. While still conforming to shaving their legs when they are on display because unless you are a competitive swimmer, gendered social norms are the only reason to shave your legs.

Well, I think we're all binary as far as sex goes. And all non-binary (fluid) when looking at gender.

I'm a woman:

• I have a shaved head
• I have a football season ticket
• I wear Doc Mart boots
• I have 27 dresses
• I have long, artistically painted nails
• I love high heels
• I love my lingerie collection even more

I'm a woman. Where I am on the 'gender spectrum', who the fuck knows?

That's my nutshell view on this ever more complex (although I'm not sure quite why it needs to be) issue

Gender is a structure of oppression, not a menu of identities.

Identifying as non-binary is seeking to opt out of your place within that oppressive structure, and to hell with everyone else.

DW is regularly asked for her pronouns and assumed to be non-binary in our woke circles because of her clothes / demeanour, but she identifies as a woman out of solidarity with me and with all females.

I am gender critical, a gender blasphemer, a gender atheist, a gender anarchist, and anti-gender. I will not say I am "gender free", because none of us can be truly gender free until we are all free of gender and of gendered oppression.

" just don't understand this need that people have to define themselves according to gender, and to label their 'gender identity'. All this drive to label themselves, to declare their pronouns. Why? What purpose does it serve?"

Claiming to be minority/victim? Establishing a special. status? Declaring yourself to be part of an new elite using the language of equality?

Identifying as non-binary is seeking to opt out of your place within that oppressive structure, and to hell with everyone else.

It's not just 'opting out' though. It's massively reenforcing the structures that my generation and the generations previous to us fought to dismantle. That said, my generation got a lot of our rebellion wrong too. In the 90s I was one of those idiots who rejected "womanly" things and preferred to be more male because my internalised misogyny stopped me from seeing that many traditionally female things were of equal value. Feminism seemed to be on the track that women could be as good as men and we proved it by being good at 'men's' things. Then we finally started to hit this realisation that women and 'women's things' were actually equal. Liking sport and sci-fi does not make be better than a woman who likes flowers and romcoms. Not wearing make-up or heels doesn't make me better than a woman who loves make-up and heels. Enjoying DIY doesn't make me better than a woman who really loves embroidery. It's absolutely fine for a woman to aspire to be a stay at home mother or a nurse or a childcare worker. Those are actually really important professions. I really loved where we had started to head, and as it happens I think it was actually really super for men too. Because by equalising the traditionally feminine, more and more men were freer to embrace those interests too. We still had a very, very long way to go but we were finally starting to get on the right path. And now we have gone sooooooooo far backwards in a very, very short space of time and we could all suffer for it it lasts much longer.

It’s totally that zana. It’s a way to say ‘I’m a bit more special than you’ basically.

Remember the particularly boring types who had those ‘You don’t have to be mad to work here, but it helps’ signs. They were so krazee. Hopefully one day we’ll be able to put the non-binaries in the same bucket. Tedious attention-seekers.

A bit of humour I spotted in the Annual edition of Private Eye.

Ace dat from the Eye!

These fuckers really need the piss extracting.

Aren’t we all non binary by that definition? 😂

It’s a load of bull, and that’s the best way to put it. Nobody 100% fulfils all of the gender stereotypes placed upon them. I’d argue anyone that tried to do that, is far more mentally unstable than somebody who is actually so much of a narcissist that they identify as NB.

I am not a non-binary person in the same way my house is not a squared-circle shape.

Not just that there is no such thing as a squared-circle shape; there could not be one such. It is logically impossible that my house is a squared-circle shape. Notice that here we need to know what a squared-circle shape purports to be before we see that it is a nonsensical notion.

Likewise, it is logically impossible that I am a non-binary person, because there could not be a non-binary person; there is no such thing as a non-binary person in this strong logical sense. Notice, again, we need to know what a non-binary person purports to be before we see the truth of the matter.

Does this mean that if someone claims to be a non-binary person then I am "denying her/his/their existence"? In a sense, yes; but only in the sense of pointing out their description of themselves is false, if that can count as a sense of "denying existence". (Can it?)

If I point out to someone who claims to live in a squared-circle-shaped house that their description of their house could not be true, would I be denying the existence of that person's house? In a way, perhaps, but ... well you know the rest.

I used to think of ex falso quodlibet as an occasionally useful formal logical tool. It has been interesting in recent times to see it play out in practical terms within the gender farrago. Does it go without saying it is not appropriate as a basis for social policy? I am somewhat horrified to find that not.

I reject the whole concept of gender identity, as much as I reject the existence of any deity. "Gender identity" is just made up bollocks, as is gender in the first place. To identify with any of these shitehawk categories is giving them legitimacy, so I refute them all in their entirety.

Do you remember the good old days, when having preferences for certain things over others was just part of your personality?

I like to think that I have a binary sex, because der, sex is a binary.

But I am non-binary gender, so don't fit in either the trans or cis boxes.

It kind of reminds me of this girl I was briefly friends with at school who liked to think she "wasn't like other girls". On the one hand she seemed to have this notion that all of us "other girls" were identical hyper-feminine Barbie types (and I
don't know where she got that from because we really didn't have anyone who fit that sort of stereotype at our school). And on the other hand, she herself actually seemed closest to this type in terms of how she dressed etc, only a black-clothed version with a few piercings and interesting coloured hair (in the days when every other person didn't have blue hair).

Why is there seemingly a link between non-binarism, pro-neurodiversity autism activists, and blue hair?

If gender does indeed exist on a spectrum, then everyone is binary to some extent.

To those claiming to reject social gender stereotypes, however, this wouldn't be a popular view. It would negate the grand gesture of 'coming out' as non-binary, and the announcement that 'their' pronouns are now 'they'.

Rebelling against gender stereotypes requires everyone else to conform to them in order that some individuals' identities can be validated. It's a curiously old-fashioned, conservative view.

Addendum: it's also amazingly egotistical.

Sorry - that should have read 'everyone is non-binary'.