My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Feminism: Sex & gender discussions

Share your experiences of gender neutral toilets

181 replies

Trou · 21/11/2019 21:46

I went into my first gender neutral toilet this week and I have to say I wasn't impressed. As I walked in two young men stared at me as they were spraying water all around the sink area. As I was washing my hands a man came in and started undoing his trousers before he was in a cubicle. Ok not crimes of the century in either case but quite grim. Never experienced these things in a traditional woman's loo. I was the only woman in there so I felt very odd. Going to the loo at work used to be a nice 5 min break to collect my thoughts. Now it's stressful. Not impressed. Anyone else tried one of these new gender neutral toilets and if so what where your impressions?

OP posts:
Report
ScreamingBeans · 25/11/2019 20:01

I went to Nando's in Bluewater a few months ago, they have gender neutral loos.

They stink of piss.

I've not been back.

Report
StuntNun · 25/11/2019 20:13

My local Pret has a gender neutral toilet: three cubicles and three sinks exactly the same as a standard ladies only shared with blokes. The only time I was in there my preschooler decided to unlock and open the cubicle door while I was on the toilet. I can't see myself ever going to that Pret ever again to be honest, not while there still are plenty of places I don't have to share the loos with men.

Report
Uncompromisingwoman · 25/11/2019 20:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fraggling · 25/11/2019 21:18

You need to read my posts my friend.
It's not my view.

Report
Fraggling · 25/11/2019 21:22

Stunt,

Yes. When I had one in a pushchair and a toddler I would try to get end cubicle and leave door open. As can't leave baby outside in pushchair, don't want to leave pushchair outside unguarded as shopping on it etc and also where put baby while using toilet? Etc

This is normal in ladies bogs we are understanding and look out for each other.

Has anyone even thought of the lived reality for women and girls? Nope.

Report
Uncompromisingwoman · 25/11/2019 21:26

Sorry Fraggling - you were being ironic. I missed your previous posts Blush

Report
Fraggling · 25/11/2019 21:27

No worries :)

Report
RuffleCrow · 25/11/2019 21:33

Do you mean unisex? They're legally only allowed to be single units not shared rooms with cubicles aren't they?

Generally the individual unisex loos i've used are stinky, urine covered and grim. Much worse than the ladies.

Report
TheMostBeautifulDogInTheWorld · 25/11/2019 21:34

One of the problems I wasn't expecting to have with them, but I do, is to do with my mother. She has fairly advanced dementia and there is no way we can let her lock a door any more, it's just not safe. So, in the classic single-sex loo arrangement she goes in and the door gets pushed shut and I stand outside (holding it closed if possible but if not, well, everyone understands) and just let the other women there know she is there, and as I say everyone understands.

The mixed sex ones we came across were at the John Radcliffe hospital in Oxford. They're actually really well designed for almost all situations - they have groups of them, where there are single-room loos (including their own basins) some of which are set up for additional needs with assistance bars and so on, some baby-change ones. They're even not tucked away in dark corridors - they're not areas where people are going to lurk looking suspicious.

But that last point made them difficult for our particular situation, because if the door had floated open it would have been incredibly public and embarrassing for my mother. So, we always had to go to the extra-access or baby-change one in any block so that there was room for two people in the cubicle, and my mother had to put up with me being with her - which wasn't exactly a problem for either of us, but it's a level of invasion of privacy that she doesn't usually have to put up with. She has dementia sure and can't do locks,. but she can still pull her own knickers up and down, for fucks sake. Except in the John Radcliffe hospital.

It just felt really sad, if you know what I mean? Hospitals are stressful enough without all that.

Report
Doryhunky · 25/11/2019 21:42

In a restaurant. Single cubicle loos giving onto basement corridor. Man pissing in toilet with door open.

Report
imamearcat · 25/11/2019 21:56

We went on holiday to France and pretty much every public toilet was unisex. Is everywhere in France like that?

Can't say it particularly bothered me. Was a bit smellier than your average woman's toilet and suppose it did feel a bit odd... especially take my young DD to the toilet.

Report
PrettyPurse · 25/11/2019 22:18

Went to a new themed restaurant near where I live. Mixed cubicles. The one l went in was disgusting. I won't go there again purely because of the toilets.

Report
ScreamingBeans · 25/11/2019 22:50

I think women need to complain every single time they have a bad experience in mixed sex loos.

Even if it's just the smell. Ask if it can be cleaned as you may need to use it again.

Make it a fucking nuisance for these companies to have mixed sex loos and they'll be less keen on them.

Report
LizB62A · 25/11/2019 22:57

Yes, our previous office had mixed toilets on one floor.
I went in once, never again.
Stank of piss and there was piss all over the seats and floor.
Horrible.....

Report
Waterandlemonjuice · 25/11/2019 23:42

I dislike them. I will not go back to places without a women’s loo and I will complain where I can.

Report
username198372 · 26/11/2019 00:11

We got them in the office! When I first joined I was absolutely horrified.
8 months on.. I am absolutely horrified!

It's stressful, it stinks and disrespectful to gender specific needs (sorry but they do exsist apparently)

Absolutely horrid idea, should be abolish. Bring on the Building regs!

Report
Dangerfloof · 26/11/2019 12:39

The sinks were on a wall of glass, basically a wall was a window
No more standing in front of the hand dryer trying to dry an item of clothing that you just washed because spills, no mooncup washing, blah blah. Getting sick of saying the same stuff everytime.

My so far one experience of mixed sex loos was at one of the visitor centres in Galloway forest. I forget which centre, but it was a small one. Only one toilet block with showers and a communal sink. Went in cubicle saw wee on the floor, went to next cubicle saw wee on the floor. Was desperate for loo so had to use. Wont ever go back.

Report
littlbrowndog · 26/11/2019 12:53

Yeah they never think of parents with babies and toddlers

Report
TwoOwlSocks · 26/11/2019 17:30

Two toilets side by side in a brand new uni student 'hub' type building. One marked with male and female signs. The other marked the same plus a disabled sign. I thought they would be single rooms behind the doors.

I opened the non-disabled door expecting a single loo with sink etc but it was a set of 4 or 5 cubicles and there were 3 men standing talking just inside. Even though the sign on the door included female I was so discombobulated I backed out and let the door close.

I gathered myself and, cos I really needed to pee, went back in. They were hanging around by the sinks talking so I squeezed past and chose the cubicle that was sort of round a slight corner at the far end.
As I passed the other cubicles I could see at least two loo seats had been left up.

I know it sounds silly but I felt really self conscious about them being able to hear me pee and I hung on until they left. When I came out there was another single guy who had just come in. After him was another single woman. It was really interesting to see she did what exactly I had done and made a beeline for the cubicle the furthest away and most 'private'.

Report
EmeraldIsle81 · 27/11/2019 03:32

An overwhelming number of posters reporting poor toilet hygiene eg pee on the floor and round the seat, also very strong urine smells etc. Is there some reason men's pee smells very strong compared to women's? Also any male posters here want to comment on the accusations of poor toilet hygiene habits...?

Report
midcenturylegs · 27/11/2019 07:26

@TwoOwlSocks not silly at all, I've been in a similar situation and just ended up "holding on" until we reached a service station with sex-segregated toilets. I worked in hotels as a Uni student where we had to clean the restaurant toilets. Always used to toss a coin as to who could clean the women's toilets as cleaning the men's a disgusting task. Another sign of misogyny I think, just expecting someone else (ie a female) would be cleaning up after them. The women's toilets were fine.
I don't know why men's pee stinks more.. maybe it doesn't actually it's just the fact that it has a chance to fester on the toilet rim, on the floors, on the walls (yes, grim).

Report
GCAcademic · 27/11/2019 09:42

Men's urine definitely smells more, I remember watching a programme where, in an effort to deter some animal or other from the grounds of whatever the place was, male employees were asked to urinate around the perimeter. They said that it was to do with the strong smell of men's urine.

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Kanin · 27/11/2019 10:11

I've been to small cafes and worked in small businesses where there will be one loo for both sexes. I've not had a problem with these as they are usually self contained - floor to ceiling walls and door - and usually kept clean. But I've been to a couple of places where the loos are labelled as gender neutral - blokes look embarrassed and assume they have the wrong loo, walls with gaps at base and ceiling - handy for cellphones, urine on seat and floor. What I have found irritating is that in a few cases the gender neutral is for both sexes, but there will be a dedicated loo for men with urinals.

Report
WomaninBoots · 27/11/2019 17:50

Male animal pee smells more because sex.

Even my (gelded) male horse's pee stinks more than the mare's wee generally. Except when she's in season... But again... sex! And they still smell different and his is a worse, more musty, smell.

Grin I spend too much of my life dealing with horse piss clearly!

Report
GoldenBlue · 27/11/2019 17:50

Conversely i saw a man knock on the door of the unisex loos before going in today, clearly nervous of bumping into a female in there. So for some men there is discomfort too

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.