Share your experiences of gender neutral toilets

[Trou]

I went into my first gender neutral toilet this week and I have to say I wasn't impressed. As I walked in two young men stared at me as they were spraying water all around the sink area. As I was washing my hands a man came in and started undoing his trousers before he was in a cubicle. Ok not crimes of the century in either case but quite grim. Never experienced these things in a traditional woman's loo. I was the only woman in there so I felt very odd. Going to the loo at work used to be a nice 5 min break to collect my thoughts. Now it's stressful. Not impressed. Anyone else tried one of these new gender neutral toilets and if so what where your impressions?

That’s the problem, is that people discussing this issue seem to forget / ignore the fact that there are many different physical configurations of public bathrooms and that, especially in older buildings, just converting them to gender neutral spaces might not be the right thing? Often these decisions are made with the best of intentions, but ignore the architecture and building layout.

I personally think gender neutral bathrooms (if done right) are the best solution. However, if the space isn’t suitable, then applying the 2010 Equality Act to segregated spaces is the next best thing.

In all instances, regardless of layout or sign on the door, toilets should be clean and safe spaces for anyone to enter. If there’s an issue with either cleanliness or safety, then this should be tackled.

A uni in my city has male, female, disabled and GN toilets. The GN toilet is just one big cubicle roughly the size of a disabled toilet.

During a recent night out I got fed up of waiting outside the female loos so went to the GN toilet instead with no queue. No issues at all. A woman used it after me and told me she ‘felt like a rebel!’

I didn’t check for a sanitary bin though. And I probably should have checked for a camera.

In all instances, regardless of layout or sign on the door, toilets should be clean and safe spaces for anyone to enter. If there’s an issue with either cleanliness or safety, then this should be tackled.

That's the thing though. Mixed sex toilets are not clean and safe in many instances. Insisting that this be tackled is yet another task on the list of things for women to sort out. I don't want that task.

The old system was not broken and doesn't need fixing. Women aren't clamouring for mixed sex toilets.

I agree ResistSexism

I read an account of a nightclub that went woke and installed gender neutral toilets. As the evening wore on women had to run the gauntlet of drunk blokes in the loos. Funnily enough none of them enjoyed it and I got the impression they won't be going back. Vote with your feet.

At work, 2 cubicles shared sink. Smelly, twice have come in to men using the loo with the door wide open.

Recently had to complain as sanitary bins were removed for more than a week.

Not enjoying the experience

This is going back some years but we used to drink at a bar in Bolton that had a makeover and became very "cool". They had had male and female toilets but post-makeover these became unisex. They were called unisex but this was 1999/2000, before this madness started.

The toilets were awful. Stinking, filthy, full of groups of predatory men, drunk men etc.
Women stopped going in the bar, and we told the manager and we wrote and told them. They changed them back to male/female very quickly. I dont really have a point except its frightening how much things have changed, but we do have some limited power, I think. It has to hit these companies in the pocket before they will listen.

Lyme Regis seafront. They are like little solid boxes - all sides and door floor to ceiling. No normal sinks either just those metal hand washer things. Observations whilst in the queue were that men don’t wash there hands as much and that men complain more - as it means they have to queue -alien concept I suppose - and they have to round women’s things - I’m quoting here. I think it was the sanitary bins he was referring too or maybe it was just biological women not sure 🤔

I worked at a place where we had both unisex and gender specific toilets. The ladies' were in a very cold corridor and the seats were very cold. I didn't want to go there as I had problems with urinary infections and cold toilet seats can worsen that, but after ten am you couldn't use the unisex toilets as there would be a big puddle of pee on the floor. Yes, one of my male coworkers peed a large puddle on the floor every singe day. I ended up using a ladies' in another department a couple of minutes away.

Was at an event Wednesday and the loos were mixed

It tended to be male presenting people went to the gents and female presenting to the ladies. Had a guy come out of a cubicle whilst I was washing my hands and I sort of startled and then remembered where I was.

Apart from that I can't say I've really noticed it when individual cubicles.

At work we have male, female and neutral

I don’t care if there are individual cubicles, whatever the configuration I do not want to share with men.
I don’t want to worry about cameras, I don’t want to be frightened that a man might be hiding behind a door , I don’t want to use a loo with urine sprayed everywhere, or that smells of male urine.
I just want what I have always had, what was considered safe and dignified for women and girls, eg a single sex space.
The reasons for us having this space to start with have not changed , the thing that has changed has nothing to do with me, my life, or my daughter’s lives. If adult males want to feel as though they are women , (or worse “girls”) that should not be my problem to solve.

Honestly 20 odd years ago in a very trendy nightclub in London.
Then a lot of the clubs started doing the same.
Of course they were just called restrooms and not gender neutral back in those days.
All kinds of stuff was going on and nobody cared.
I didn't mind because I was young and stupid , extremely drunk most of the time and we all used to pile into one cubicle and talk and take turns using the loo.
That was straight women and gay men, all close friends 😂
Terrible behaviour .
So glad I'm not young and so silly anymore.
Would I even set foot into these new mixed sex toilets now ?
Not a bloody chance in hell.
This self identifying business is just too much.
I was talking to two of my old flat mates ( gay males & my sister who's lesbian) after watching the seahorse documentary a few weeks ago and we all agreed that gay people who once would have been considered camp / femme or butch are being encouraged to identify as trans.
My sister runs a pub in Soho and says it's got ridiculously out of hand.
A handful of trans people are trying to get mixed sex loos in a LGBT pub and she's fighting hard against it.
You can only imagine the abuse she's getting.

It's all about money, I think.

Women writing to bars, restaurants, clubs etc telling them they are taking their money elsewhere to their rivals.

Fewer women in the room spending money (or having money spent on them).

And - how do I put it - fewer men coming in because they've learned there are more women at different venues that do have single sex loos.

I don't know where I'm going with this, it's been a long time since I was in the clubs & bars world!

Anyone remember 'Ally McBeal' and the super cool mixed loos where the best conversations happened? If we only knew then ...

I hosted a couple of school friends last week and took them out and about to various London museums and galleries.
They come from several hundred miles North of where I currently live.
They complained loudly about the smell in all the gender neutral toilets.
They expressed their astonishment and disapproval at the fact that nearly all the toilets were gender neutral.
I had to shush them on several occasions when they spotted obviously male people in stereotypically female clothes/makeup/heels.
They were both stunned into silence when going through the make up department in a large store. Thank goodness.

We have gender neutral loos at work (4 individual rooms along a corridor, each has a sink inside). They all stink of male piss, there is wee on the floor every day. I've been there a year and three times so far have opened a cubicle door to find a man pissing inside having not locked the door behind him, which is certainly more embarrassing for the man than for me but it's still a very uncomfortable situation for all. We all cope with it but I can't help but think that everyone would enjoy their experience more if we had 2 x cubicles labelled women, 1 x men and 1 x neutral.

Throughabushbackwards Could you and your colleagues ask for that ? Hardly unreasonable.

I'm not brave enough. All above me have properly drunk the trans kool-aid (we've had the gender jelly baby talk and all). I know it makes me a coward but I can't risk my position or the state of my professional relationships at this point in time.

My experience is that I go for a wee, wash my hands and leave , just as I do in "traditional" toilets
The only issue is I find that men rarely seem to lock the doors strangely. I think they're used to urinals so don't feel the need

I think men who get their dicks out before they go into the cubicle need reporting for indecent exposure, personally.
And if you don't feel up to reporting it, at least mention it in the Trip Advisor review.

My work (nhs hospital specialist centre) has all "gender neutral" toilets for patients and staff (all outpatients, no wards) and have have done since the new building opened a few years ago. They are fully enclosed walled cubicles off the corridor with sinks, bins etc all inside. They are not called gender neutral and just labelled as toilets. They are kept clean and tidy and as far as I know nobody has been upset by them. Personally I prefer them to traditional icicles within a ladies toilet as it feels much more private and people can't hear you go etc.

I was at an event yesterday in a small building.
There were two toilets, both individual rooms.
There was a mixed queue of men and women.
Once in the rooms, they were fairly spacious, one WC, sink, sanitary bin, and a little basket with pads in.
Clean, fresh smelling, and everyone queueing was quiet and polite.

Work has gender neutral, single cubicles.
They are fine, but I miss the old days.

It's not like being in public with men. It's suddenly being alone in private with a strange man.

Thank you for articulating this Antibles. I've been trying to work out why I feel so uncomfortable in shared loos and you've hit the nail on the head.

Most toilets aren't single cubicles with floor to ceiling doors etc though strawberry.

The one I was in the other day the sinks were shared and there were gaps under the doors. Not big ones but they were there.

Also see the sign they have had to put up that I shared in the thread.

Does that sound ok for women to you?