They them pronouns

[Yeahnahyeah]

So I just watched a you tube video by a non binary blue haired person who was reporting on her pride parade experience. This person uses they/them pronouns.

They spent well over ten minutes complaning that wherever they went that day (watching the parade, coffee, meeting friends) sooo many people did not use the correct they/them pronouns; it was constant, and offensive, etc etc.

The thing is, I only very rarely hear my pronouns used. (She/her ). I find it hard to believe this person heard them so many times over a few hours, so I'm calling it out.

How often do you hear your pronouns on an average day?

And I feel really stupid and a bit resentful that I have had to use 'they' throughout this post, or do the rules on here not extend to they/them?

I just read a post where a woman very kindly explained that pronouns do not function like white-out for those dissatisfied with reality.

I think at a certain point they will come up with an alternative to 'you' as well

I'm all for a return of the singular thou, thee, thy and nominative plural ye.

Much more interesting than whining on about third person pronouns.

One of my non-binary patients came in the other day for a routine check-up and had a mini-tantrum when I accidentally slipped up at one point and asked her mom if she would like "her" to get the flu vaccine. (I had dutifully used they and them for the whole visit up to that point.)

It is now crystal clear to me that the whole gender movement is the consequence of a self-obsessed population. Genderism is the symptom, but the underlying disease is narcissism. We have exchanged concern for others for just me, awareness of our community for only that which affects me, and any sense of greater purpose in life to just my own personal "feelings" of happiness, (not even genuine contentment). It's sad and it disgusts me.

What did you say - how did you react to ‘the rage’. It’s like when a minor royal has a hissy fit if you called them by their name rather than title.

I saw an HCP in hospital scrubs the other day wearing a badge with "they/their" on it. It struck me as positively cruel to patients who are vulnerable, scared and probably a bit overwhelmed by being in hospital to insist they refer to a clearly male person as "they".

Genderism is the symptom, but the underlying disease is narcissism. We have exchanged concern for others for just me, awareness of our community for only that which affects me, and any sense of greater purpose in life to just my own personal "feelings" of happiness, (not even genuine contentment).

The only pronouns these people really care about are 'I' and 'me'.

It’s the mememe generation plus social media. Self-centred All flair and no substance. Lack of critical thinking and compassion.

People whining about ‘they called me ‘she’ when obviously I feel like a ‘he/them’ when the planet is overheating and the amazon is on fire. The doomsday clock is ticking away and all people seem to give two hoots about is ‘I feel like a man today so I’ll wear a hat!!’.

I think the they/their annoys me because it’s plural. Surely the pronouns should be it/its for a single non-binary person

Surely the pronouns should be it/its for a single non-binary person

Good point.

Whenever I hear people, inevitably under the age of 30, wanging on about they/them, what their pronouns are, being triggered, literal violence etc I always start humming Green Day in my head. "Do you have the time, to listen to me whine?" And the answer is no I bloody don't! People with jobs and/or kids and/or caring responsibilities and/or a busy life have got more important things to worry about.

It really is a disease of a narcissistic, self absorbed mememe subsection of a generation that spends far too long online and not enough time out in the real world.

Are they the grotesque bastard children of Emos (with a good dose of entitlement thrown in)?

Apologies to any ex/emos - who just got on with their lives, tried not to piss everyone off and wanted everyone to stay the hell away.

Actually they remind me of hippies back in the day - well the darker side of it anyway.

I think the they/their annoys me because it’s plural. Surely the pronouns should be it/its for a single non-binary person

Not really, tbh. The use of 'they' as a singular third person pronoun to refer to someone of unknown sex is quite standard usage.
It's not standard in the case of a person of known sex eg a specific individual or a pregnant woman.

Perhaps we could easily circumvent the 'pronoun' issue by insisting right from the start that everyone be referred to as 'they'. Personally never been confronted by this ludicrous thing, but couldn't go along with it if I was. I'd just get in there straight away and suggest this.

Somehow, don't think some people would be happy at not being singled out for special treatment, though.

'They' is valid at as general pronoun, and I often use it myself, in written text, for the purpose of neutralisation.

Some people seem to have problems with using neutral pronouns grammatically correctly even though we have, of course, always used they etc when we don't know what sex the person is. I read part of an article the other day (PN) where they had written their's ie with apostrophe . I know they aren't proper journalists but come on!

Brilliant idea. Let’s call EVERYONE they..

Reminds me of this

Adding an apostrophe to theirs, ours, its is a very common, and in my view understandable mistake.

Maybe not so much for a 'journalist' though, and certainly not for an editor. Do PN have editors?

Some people seem to have problems with using neutral pronouns grammatically correctly even though we have, of course, always used they etc when we don't know what sex the person is.

I'd be fairly sure these people use 'they' as a singular frequently, without even noticing. Because, in the absence of knowledge of a persons sex, it's the normal thing to do in English, we don't routinely say 'he or she' (and heaven forfend we return to using 'he' as a default as would sometimes be the case in the past!).

The problem of course arises when faced with a specific person whose sex is obvious. Even if you're concentrating, there's the Stroop effect in play.

FFS, didn’t mean to post it twice.

Adding an apostrophe to theirs, ours, its is a very common, and in my view understandable mistake.

Bloody autocorrect is liable put an apostrophe in a possessive its. But I'd usually notice!

If it was they for everyone how would certain people be validated though?

But agree that they is pretty acceptable in the singular and I use it quite a bit. It’s harder when you’re referring to an actual person whose sex you know though rather than a hypothetical.

Language is a convention and there are languages without gendered pronouns. There is no NEED to mention my sex in absolutely any description of me. But I suspect that no TRAs want to get rid of gendered pronouns, they just want to control who can use them.

I'm glad the idea that you never hear your own pronouns has been refuted as nonsense. In any group conversation people will refer to others present with he or she! Using their name everytime would be ridiculously clunky.

Similarly rubbish about using 'it' or people not knowing how to use they/them (or as I've seen on Mumsnet people deliberately doing it wrongly to try to 'prove a point').

I was arranging a new hires work environment earlier today, sex unknown (because we haven't actually hired anyone yet!) and no one has any problem understanding sentences like "They will need a desk". If I'd said it will need a desk people would have thought I was bonkers.

I'm by no means pro-gender bollocks but pretending that 'no one hears their own pronouns' or 'you can't use they/them for a single person' just makes it sound like you don't know what you're talking about.

Kind of rude to say refuted as nonsense when the examples given were from personal experience. You might not agree or have the same experience.

Beamur I think it would be pretty unusual though to never hear gendered pronouns used about yourself unless you never work or socialise or spend time with more than one person at a time. I think most people just don’t clock how often it happens though.

. I think most people just don’t clock how often it happens though.

Yes - because using 'he' and 'she' in the contexts described are so normal.