Banned from women-only FB group

[maet]

A trans woman edited by MNHQ because OP is using second language posted in a women's only FB group wanting free emotional labour and "validation" from untrained women to help them with getting over their abusive ex boyfriend.

I stated it wasn't appropriate to ask untrained women to take on their emotional labour, especially considering what had happened to them was so traumatic (according to them they ended up in hospital), and especially not for free and suggested they seek professional help instead.

Cue trans woman and women stating I was being transphobic, and "wouldn't understand the fear a marginalised group would go through."

I was told I hadn't been through a traumatic experience before so couldn't possibly understand what the OP was going through.

I've been banned from a group specifically designed for women. Nowhere in the post did I mention anything about the OP being trans.

I am so sick of this shit. The world has gone mad.

*The world has gone mad
Indeed.

Pfft. bold fail. Should have previewed.

It's irrelevant to the topic under discussion

It wasn't irrelevant to this thread.

The OP made several rude comments the gist of which were Decomposing had nothing better to do with her time than waste it on here. The OP apparently is oblivious to the fact the same could be said of her.

I suppose Composers could simply have said something like "you know nothing about me, but personal reasons dictate, that yes, I am very limited in what I can do"

After getting the explanation the OP continued to make snide remarks about "not getting out of the house".

the debate is not about making people feel like they're arseholes The OP's comments about Composer having nothing better to do came across as exactly like that.

As for the @ issue. Personally I think it's a fuss about nothing but the OP was asked not to do it. She continued to use it and is getting excuses made for her.

It's not normally a 'go to' at all though is it. Everyone is very aware of the intended effect.

If someone says, oh get a life, doesn't mean anyone has to then set out what their life is?

It's not an ask for details, personal information, medically history, and inappropriate to a discussion about something totally irrelevant to it.

...I guess you don't see that, we do though.

Just ignore it? Or say "why don't you get a life, you're on here too?"

That is what Composers did initially. The OP persisted.

Oh well, hurrah, let's make it all about this now, and totally derail.

I will not comment on it again, because it's further derailing, and I suggest others follow suit

It's hardly a derail when the entire thread is about the OP's behaviour in online forums/groups.

I for one now find it a lot less surprising that she was banned from a Facebook group.

..I guess you don't see that, we do though

Who is "we" ?

What I'm seeing is excuses, excuses, excuses being made for a rather rude and hypocritical poster.

People shouldn't post explicit details out of the blue and not on an irrelevant forum. that is the point of the thread. Its used by abusive people as well as those who are ill.

Allowing people to do that will kill a forum faster than anything, because thats all you will end up with. The people who need the forum will leave.

I haven't been rude or hypocritical. This isn't an AIBU, this is in the Feminism discussion board. A lot of posters seem to forget that. It's been overtaken by people who seem to want to silence women for speaking out on issues that concern them. Ironic. I'm letting this thread die. If I knew how to get it deleted I would.

I for one now find it a lot less surprising that she was banned from a Facebook group

Yes me too. The details of what she said given in opening post bear little resemblance to the much more reasoned version which appeared later.

It's been overtaken by people who seem to want to silence women for speaking out on issues that concern them. Ironic. I'm letting this thread die. If I knew how to get it deleted I would.

Why do you want this thread deleted if not to silence women who have disagreed with you?

I haven't been rude or hypocritical

You have been both.

Can you really not see how hypocritical you are in criticising Decomposers for wasting time on here when you are doing exactly the same?

Try reading back what you said to her over the last few hours you have both been posting (wasting time) here.

I suppose Composers could simply have said something like "you know nothing about me, but personal reasons dictate, that yes, I am very limited in what I can do"

You're right, that's a better response. I let my heart rule my head.

It's not to silence anyone. It's just to forget about it. I'm over being banned from the group now. Next time I will just keep quiet. I'll stop voicing my opinions. It's been nice getting different perspectives, but in the end people seem bored and are spoiling for a fight, and I'm not.

I’d like to remind others that the OP has said many times that English is not her first, or even second, language, so both expressing themselves clearly the first time around and abiding by requests to not @ is more difficult for her.

Stop being bullies.

There's some wankers on here.

I’d like to remind others that the OP has said many times that English is not her first, or even second, language, so both expressing themselves clearly the first time around and abiding by requests to not @ is more difficult for her.

The OPs English is impeccable, including using colloquial phrases too. I doubt they are having any problems comprehending what is being said.

Why do you want this thread deleted if not to silence women who have disagreed with you?

Maybe because pathetic people on this thread are harassing her about language when it’s been said many times this isn’t even her second language, and that repeating the same fucking things over and over with someone you clearly disagree with and have since page 1, is irritating as hell!

Oh come off it Jessica . The OP has very good English. Her snide and hypocritical comments about wasting time are not defensible. We're all wasting time on here. There was no need for those comments.

I know there have been errors, and I'm borrowing phrases and using quotation marks because I'm not sure if they're accurate or in context to what I'm saying. My English is far from impeccable, and I'm okay with this. I'm not using it as an excuse either, I'm happy to be told when I've made errors in English.

The OPs English is impeccable, including using colloquial phrases too. I doubt they are having any problems comprehending what is being said.

There you go again! Immediately thinking the worst and disbelieving the OP- who has said in this thread she finds it difficult. You’re unbelievable. Truly fucking lacking in self awareness.

There you go again! Immediately thinking the worst and disbelieving the OP- who has said in this thread she finds it difficult. You’re unbelievable. Truly fucking lacking in self awareness.

How am I being disbelieving? I can see with my own eyes how well the op can communicate in English - better than some native English speakers.

The op is being self deprecating in saying her English isn't very good - she's clearly much more accomplished than she realises.

My English is far from impeccable, and I'm okay with this. I'm not using it as an excuse either, I'm happy to be told when I've made errors in English

I have not noticed a single grammatical or idiomatic error in your English.

I have, as I said before, noticed hypocrisy and rudeness in your comments about Decomposer. You seem incapable of understanding how hypocritical it is to accuse her of having nothing better to do / tell her to get a life when you are wasting as much time on here as she is.

Your command of the English language has nothing to do with your rudeness and hypocrisy.

Maybe because pathetic people on this thread are harassing her about language

The OP was not being harassed about her language. That is a blatant twisting of facts.