What shall I call myself?

[justchecking1]

HR are asking all of us to state the gender we identify with 🤦‍♂️

I have decided I am going to go with a kind of fluid approach whereby I will identify with whichever identity proves to be most personally beneficial to me at any given time 😊

What title shall I give my newfound gender? Gender manipulative? Gender egocentric? Can you help me come up with a suitable name to satisfy the admin-droids (or does the category already genuinely exist?!)

I wonder if the best approach might be to identify as human. Because so much of feminism for me seems to come down to my belief that I want to be counted as fully human in the face of a male dominated society which insists I'm only about 80% of one at best).

Make a cuppa and read this

genderfluidsupport.tumblr.com/gender

I hate to start at the As, but I definitely think it is

Alexigender: a gender that is fluid between more than one gender but the individual cannot tell what those genders are

I hope I never have to deal with this...

I'd be very tempted to respond that forcing you to reveal your gender identity publicly is transphobic and prejudiced, harassment and probably illegal.

Or:

Egogender: a gender that is so personal to your experience that it can only be described as “you”

[no shit, Sherlock].

Fuck with their heads:

Systemgender: a gender that is the sum of all the genders within a multiple or median system

Oh, it's this

Quoigender: feeling as if the concept of gender is inapplicable or nonsensical to one’s self

Male.
Might get a promotion.

I agree with 'male, where's my pay rise?'

I want the title to be in some way reflective of the fact that I think all this is a crock of crap, but that I am perfectly prepared to exploit this for my own benefit if that's the way the workplace seems to be going. Yet I want it to be serious enough that I can argue it as a genuine identity if someone in HR decides to call me on it

That list IS serious.

Just ignore it. Its none of their business. Its not a protected characteristic so there's no point in gathering the info. It's an exercise in pointless futility.

If you pick one from the Stonewall umbrella they have to affirm it because Stonewall says it's real.

I'm genderfree but I reserve the right to change my gender at any given moment.

Did you see the thread about the woman who was genderfree and applied for an award at work? The thread was identifying (in a real sense) so it was taken down but I do hope she won... the TRA lobby were furious on Twitter it was just brilliant!

"I identify as a trans woman"

"But you're not trans"
"But trans women are women, in every possible way, aren't they?"
"of course, but..."
"Are you suggesting trans women are different from other women?!"
"No, but...."
"Are you trying to invalidate my identity?"
"..."

Blow their minds and say Woman.
That is after all, what you are.

Collgender: the feeling of having too many genders simultaneously to describe each one.

No further explanation needed. Apparently. Although I'm confused as fuck.

Changed my mind. This one's better:

Exgender: the outright refusal to accept or identify in, on, or around the gender spectrum

Maybe channel Prince and just request a symbol. Or a shape maybe?

#genderfree

Therefore: I’ll wear whichever clothes best suit the weather, have pockets to carry my shit. I’ll have hair as long as I fancy - on my head and my body - and no one will care. I’ll take the highest pay available for my experience, and I won’t lose out because this is all about gender, not systemic oppression based on sex, right? Right?

Genderfree. It’s the way forward.

Exgender

Is this one for real?

If so, I might just be trans after all!!

It's on that Tumblr link further up, must be legit. Nobody can object because that would be literal violence.

I'd go with Aerogender: a gender that is influenced by your surroundings . The relevant surrounding influence can then be "whatever group is up for an award/ promotion". Your pronoun can be the blank tile from scrabble and any one who asks you how its pronounced is transphobic.

How can people take this shite seriously? It's as if a bunch of 12 year olds noticed for the first time that humans have different personalities and decided this was some groundbreaking observation that no one else had yet discovered.

No no, Affectugender: a gender that is affected by mood swings - then no one can ever accuse you of being hormonal or suggest its that time of the month because that's invalidating your identity. Terms like "hysterical" and "emotional" will immediately become hate crimes.

That list - what a pile of total complete and utter shite!
Honestly, who makes this stuff up and were they on glue at the time?