The cotton ceiling for gay men

[MindTheMinotaur]

Someone just asked on another thread, if there is a cotton ceiling equivalent for gay men. I thought I'd post this link

Sorry in phone and can't post link, basically Clinique have produced a guide for trans men cruising in saunas which includes advice on how to avoid disclosing your sex. Easily available on Google.

Clinque as in the beauty company?

No organisation called Cliniq the guide is available as a PDF. I really am rubbish on a phone, sorry

I see thanks. I thought that was odd.

cliniq.org.uk/resources/cruising-a-trans-guys-guide-to-the-gay-sex-scene/

cliniq.org.uk/resources/cruising-a-trans-guys-guide-to-the-gay-sex-scene/

Finally.

Thanks Ova!

Hm that strikes me of kind dangerous for the trans guys. They are after all female, trying to deceive men who expect them to be male.

Clinique 😂

Getting back to the subject In hand. Men aren’t socialised to be nice so it’s spectaculary bad advice to give transmen to decieve men in this way. Very dangerous.

"...a guide for trans men cruising in saunas which includes advice on how to avoid disclosing your sex."

• Keep your towel on?

I really don't know how gay men would feel about this. I have closeted friends who cottaged in the 90s, it seemed a very...erm...carefree approach to pickups from what they told me about it. I think most saunas have security and take care of customers but I've no direct experience.

‘This leaflet uses the term front home to describe the vagina’

...I ....I mean... I just can’t....even.

I mean WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCKITY FUCK???? Front hole???

*front hole

Not front home

But men’s parts are called ‘cocks’

Fuck off

A guide to obtaining sex by deception! Yay!

Also, why does what purports to be a public health guide use the terms 'fucking' 'arsehole' and 'go to the toilet to shit'

You think they think that's how all gay men talk all the time?

There was a thread not too long ago on datalounge (a gay site) about a similar article. Most were not nice, kind or respectful about it.

It seems like a very dodgy situation to get yourself into as an ftm although gay men aren't generally known for violence against people they perceive as women so possibly they would just be rejected repeatedly in a way that felt cruel rather than be physically harmed.

I don't think you can ever be sure though because people tend to act in very visceral ways to this type of deception.

www.outlife.org.uk/fs155-what-is-sex-really-like-for-a-gay-trans-man

This article by one of the workers at the clinic interviews a transman who is regularly using saunas and hiding his status.

I searched awhile ago for this, so I think the deception part was far more apparent in the article I've just linked to than the guide- sorry for being misleading.

I was basically interested in whether there was the same pressure on gay men to accept trans men as partners and if this was something they were uncomfortable with or if there was more acceptance.

Well. That guide has been very enlightening. In a bad way.
I find the photos really shocking and sad , looks like a masculine gay guy getting bj's and otherwise dominating "gay" trans men. ie confused women who as far as one can judge from the pictures might otherwise be heterosexual women or lesbians. Mind I'm feeling a bit confused now too. What with front holes and cocks. (It helpfully points out cocks might be the real deal or they might be the gay guys clitoris, enlarged or not. Christ can we just go back to biology like we used to know it.

I don't think there is the same pressure (yet) because culture still defines men as the pursuers of sex, so to some extent they still get to pick and choose and socialisation means ftm's are unlikely to exert the same pressure as mtf's do towards lesbians.

If you view these things as a biological hierarchy rather than through the gender prism gay men still have the upper hand here.

I also suspect there will be more gay/bi men who are okay with sex with an ftm under anonymous/cruising circumstances than lesbians are within their dating circles because of the general difference in attitudes towards sex between men and women.

However I don't think many would be okay with deception even if they would have given the person a chance upon knowing the truth.

Here's a link to the data lounge thread. Not for the faint hearted.
Reply 7 made me laugh though, crude as it is.
On a serious note I really worry for these young women convincing themselves they are gay guys and heading off to male saunas in search of sex. I really can't think of many more risky behaviours and yet they seem to be oblivious.

https://www.datalounge.com/thread/22392276-trans-man-kicked-out-of-london-gay-sauna-for-not-having-a-penis

It was actually a different thread I was thinking of. Can't remember the title though - I guess maybe it is starting to become a more pressing issue in the gay male community if these articles are becoming more commonplace.

I remember reading a blog post a few months back around the same time that I heard about the cotton ceiling by a transman that was about “vagiphobia” so it does exist but like pp have said, I can’t see it ending well for someone with a female body who tries tricking someone with a male body. Can’t remember much about it so can’t provide a link, sorry.

Ova. I also suspect there will be more gay/bi men who are okay with sex with an ftm under anonymous/cruising circumstances than lesbians are within their dating circles

From that outline link it seems Jamie chooses dark steamy rooms and backless pants. Need I say more.

I do find it sad though. Obviously it's way out of my sexual experience or indeed what I would ever consent to but I can't help feeling Jamie just gets off on the validation. I can't see what else there is in that sort of experience. But hey ho. Just park me in the bay marked "prude". No need for re-education.

find the photos really shocking and sad , looks like a masculine gay guy getting bj's and otherwise dominating "gay" trans men.

Yes, I thought that about the photos as well. Knowing those 'men' are female, the photos are kind of..... uncomfortable.

And the thing is, with the rise in ROGD amongst young women, there is going to be more and more of this (I don't know what the percentages of transmen are straight/gay is) and there will be more and more young women putting themselves into risky situations in order to try and 'be men'.